Practicality
by silentnc
Summary: TEMP HIATUS. Bella moves to Seattle to start college when she meets Edward, a guy she is drawn to but who is unattainable, and James, a nice guy that she decides she might settle for. But does she really know James, who is becoming very possessive? ExB AH
1. Chapter 1

**Discalimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I own nothing.**

**A/N: This is my first attempt at Twilight fan fiction, I hope you enjoy.**

**Thank you to herinfiniteeyes for betaing and encouraging me to post this (finally). If you like awesome lemonade go check out her stories.**

I didn't bother to lift my feet as I shuffled out of my room and down the stairs into the kitchen. It was honestly not a very smart move on my part. I was accident prone to the core and could usually manage to trip even if I deliberately paid attention to where I was going. Thankfully I arrived at the table in one piece as I sat down with a bowl of cereal and the newspaper.

I opened the paper to the classifieds and scanned the apartment listings quickly. I had checked them a few days ago so I didn't expect to find too many new ones. I had called on a few earlier in the week and even went to see one the day before, but the place was far below human living standards. Of course, with my budget, I couldn't expect too much.

I had been avoiding the ads listed by those looking for roommates. I didn't really want a roommate, especially one I just met. It seemed disastrous to move in and live with someone you barely knew. However, I was running out of time to find a place. I sighed and finally made myself glance at a few of them.

One caught my attention immediately.

Looking for roommate. Located close to campus. Low rent.

It seemed simple and honest so I made a note of the number. Low rent probably meant that it was a dump, but being close to campus without living in a dorm was all I could ask for. The fact that it mentioned campus allowed me to hope that the person placing the ad was a student as well.

I was very excited about starting college. Actually, I was more excited to offically leave high school behind. I had grew up in Forks, Washington, small town USA, where everyone knew everyone and no one had any secrets. It seemed that everything I hated about high school like wild rumors and relentless gossip followed you into adulthood. It reminded me of a soap opera, where everyone was tangled into everyone else's life and there was a constant stream of drama. I couldn't much blame them, what else was there to do? Nevertheless, during my 18 years spent there I cherished my privacy and had successfully kept to myself, and I was quick to make my exit.

I was temporarily bunking with my brother, Emmett, and his wife, Rosalie. They lived in Seattle and not too far from the University of Washington. They had offered their extra room to me once I decided on UW and I had been staying with them for the latter half of the summer. However, they had recently discovered that they were pregnant. They insisted I was still welcome and there was no rush to move out, but I knew they needed their space and would want to prepare their nursery.

Emmett walked into the kitchen and playfully tussled my hair as he passed.

"Mornin' Bells," he said way too cheerfully for the early hour. He grabbed a bowl from the cabinet, sat down next to me and poured himself some cereal.

"Morning," I said gruffly. I looked around. "Where's Rosalie?"

"Puking," he said causally without looking up, adding milk to his bowl.

"Emmett!" I scolded. "Why aren't you up there with her? You should be soothing her!" I swatted his arm with the back of my hand.

"Hey!" he flinched and looked at me wide-eyed. "I tried ok! She told me to get the hell out!"

I rolled my eyes at him, but in all honesty it sounded like Rosalie. She was a nice person and I found living with her fairly manageable, but she had a strong personality that could be very intimidating. I went back to searching the ads, biting on the end of my pen cap.

"Any luck?" Emmett asked after a moment.

"Um, yeah. I may have found one."

"There really isn't any rush, you know." He looked up at me as he stuffed a heaping spoonful of cereal into his mouth.

"I know. But you will need me out eventually, and I would rather not have to move in the middle of the semester."

He shrugged. "Well, don't take a place just because you feel like you need to get out. We have a long nine months before we need your room."

I smiled and nodded, then returned my attention to the paper. Unfortunately I didn't find any others worth calling.

A few hours later I reluctantly called the number I had noted.

"Hello?" a chipper voice answered after only one ring.

"Um, hi. I was calling about the apartment."

"Of course! What's your name?"

"Bella."

"Bella," she said testing my name out. Apparently my name saficed as she followed up with, "Are you a student?"

"Yes," I answered.

"Perfect! Now, what time can you come by?" she asked cheerfully.

I paused for a moment and consulted the clock. "Four?"

"Sounds great. Come to 878 Forest Grove, I'm in apartment 621. See ya then!" She hung up.

I pulled the phone from my ear and looked at it in confusion, not sure how I felt as I pressed end. I began to question my decision to consider roommates, but figured I should meet her in person before jumping to any conclusions.

I arrived at the building at ten til four, parked and got out. Looking around I quickly realized there was no way this was low rent. The grounds around the building were beautifully landscaped and the building itself looked fairly new, not to mention my rusty truck stuck out like a sore thumb next to the newer coupes surrounding it. Maybe the perky person on the phone had a different definition of low rent than the rest of the world, or at least the middle class.

I shook my head, knowing it was a waste of time, but decided to go through the formalities at least, as she was expecting me.

I easily found my way through the building and to her door. I raised my hand to knock but the door opened before I could touch it. A small girl who seemed to be my age with short, dark hair and bright emerald eyes appeared before me. Her face was lit up in excitement.

"You must be Bella!" she claimed cheerfully. She grabbed my hand and pulled me through the doorway.

"I'm so excited about meeting you! You have no idea how many calls I have gotten and people coming by. It's honestly been a nightmare, but my last roommate transferred to UCLA and all my friends are in the middle of their leases and I had to find _someone_ to live with. I can't live by myself! I mean, Angela has been gone for over two weeks and I am about to go out of my mind." She talked a mile a minute and I started to wonder when she would take a breath.

"Anyway, when you called I got so excited! I could tell from your voice you were friendly. You have no idea the weirdos that I have been through here!"

Throughout her rambling I had stared in awe as she pulled me through the apartment. If I hadn't know it before I got into the room, it was obvious now; the place was not in my budget. The living room was as bigger than the one in my childhood home and was decorated extravagantly. It looked like something out of a magazine with its sleek furniture, expensive art pieces and hardwood floors. The ceiling was high and the room opened to a large balcony.

The small girl next to me watched as I looked around.

"So, what do you think? Do you like it?" she asked. "If you have things of your own, I _might_ be able to work them in somewhere, but I will have to see them first."

I looked at her in disbelief. She was practically offering me the place with me having said only a handful words to her, all of which had been over the phone up to this point.

"It's very nice--," I started, about to inform her I could never afford it, but she started pulling me in another direction.

"Great! I knew you would like it. Let me show you your room!"

She pulled me across the room and down a short hall that consisted of four doors.

"Bathroom," she listed as we passed the first one.

"Closet," she pointed to the door across from the bathroom.

"My room," she motioned to the second door on the right.

We approached the last door on the left and she pulled it open dramatically slow. "And this will be yours."

I walked the rest of the way in. The room was huge, painted a soft lavender color with thick brown curtains drawn back from the oversized window located on the far wall. It was completely furnished with dark mahogany bed, dresser and a nightstand that held an expensive looking lamp. I wasn't usually one for the formal look, but it was beautiful. I wished badly I could take it.

"Nice, huh? You can change the color if you want, and bring your own furniture if you are more comfortable with it. I just keep it this way for guests. Oh, and the hallway bath will be all yours, I have my own in my room," the small girl said from behind me. I turned around to face her.

"Look.. this place is great, but it's obviously out of my price range."

She narrowed her eyes and smirked at me. "What's your price range?"

I looked at the floor and bit my lip. "Well, I have a job lined up with the campus library. I should have about $400 for rent."

"Perfect," she said as grabbed me again and started pulling me back toward the living room.

"Now, when can you move in? The movers who moved Ang out were really fast and I could call and have them at your place tomorrow. Well, wait; are you already living in the city? I'm sure it doesn't matter, they can go--"

I stopped in my tracks, causing her to stop and spin toward me.

"Wait; didn't you hear what I said? I can't afford to live here."

She laughed and waved her hand dismissively. "Don't be silly. What you have is fine. I can cover everything else."

I stared at her incredulously. "Really, that's very generous, but I couldn't accept. I wouldn't feel right about not being able to pay for my own part."

"Bella," she laughed again, "its honestly no problem. Money is not an issue. I could afford the place by myself, but I like the company. You'll be doing me a favor."

I frowned at her. I didn't want to disappoint her, but there was no way I was going to let a stranger pay part of my rent. She noticed my expression.

"Oh come on, Bella! Please! Don't make me have to sift through more crazy people! I promise it's not a big deal. Plus where will you go? I know what the pickings are like out there. It's only a 15 minute ride to campus and I'm great to live with!" Her eyes pleaded with me.

As much as I wanted to tell her how I loathed depending on others, I knew she was right. There was no way I would find a decent place and move in before classes started in under two weeks.

She must have seen my defenses weakening because suddenly she squealed, jumped and clapped simultaneously before crushing me in a hug. I was taken back by the force of her small frame.

"Oh this is so exciting! Now, like I was saying, I can get those movers to you by--," I cut her off.

"I don't need movers, my brother and his friend can handle it."

"Great! So just call me tomorrow and let me know when to expect you," she said as we started toward the door. I was almost in the hall before I paused and turned on my heel to look at her.

"I don't even know your name," I realized.

Her smile widened. "I'm Alice."

The next afternoon I arrived in my truck loaded down with my belongings. There wasn't a lot to move as I had decided not to bring my bedroom furniture. Alice insisted it was fine to use what was in there, and I didn't see the point of making her go to the trouble of moving it all out and having it stored somewhere.

I grabbed a large box from the back of my truck as Emmett and Rosalie's younger brother, Jasper, discussed how best to handle my desk. When we got to the door Alice opened it again before we could knock.

"Hi, Bella!" She greeted me as if I had known her my whole life instead of just a little more than a day. She stepped aside as I walked in with Emmett and Jasper on my heels. We all headed back to my new room and I directed the boys where to place the desk. Once their hands were free I introduced them.

"Alice, this is my brother, Emmett, and his brother-in-law, Jasper."

Alice stared at them and although I hadn't known her long, I was fairly positive that it was the longest amount of time that she went without speaking. Her gaze seemed to linger on Jasper, and I noticed a slight smirk on his face as he returned the stare. Emmett took a step in her direction and held out his hand.

"Hey there," Emmett grinned. His voice seemed to break the spell on her and she took his hand.

"Hello," she smiled sweetly. "You must be Bella's brother, you have those doe eyes just like her. Plus you seem just as friendly." She turned to face Jasper with her hand still outstretched, but instead of shaking it he pulled it to his mouth, kissing her knuckles. I rolled my eyes.

"Alice, nice to meet you. I'm Jasper." I thought I saw him wink. She just smiled in return.

Finally we left to get the next load, Alice in tow.

It only took a few hours to unload everything, but Alice talked the entire time. I was relieved when her focus drifted to Jasper, asking him numerous questions. At one point Emmett gave me a concerned look that seemed to be questioning my choice in roommate but I just shrugged. Alice was harmless and her chatter didn't really bother me all that much.

Once everything was in I collapsed on the couch, letting my eyes close and taking a deep breath. After seeing the guys out Alice joined me.

"Jasper seems really nice," she said softly.

"He is," I said without opening my eyes.

She was quiet for a moment. "Do you know if he is... seeing anyone?"

I lifted my head from the back of the couch and looked at her, smiling just a little. "I don't know. I don't think so."

She smiled sheepishly. "Well, I hope I get to see him again soon."

I shrugged. "I'm sure Emmett will have one of his cookouts soon enough. I'll take you if you'd like."

She jumped slightly in her seat. "That would be great!" She then allowed herself to collapse against the couch as well and sighed happily. She seemed so easily pleased.

"Thanks again for the room, Alice. I wish I could--," I started but she stopped me.

"Bella, it's fine. I'm just glad you accepted. Now we can be best friends," she said very matter-of-factly.

I smiled at her as we began talking. We discussed a little bit of everything; what we were going to school for (me for English and her for Psychology), our likes and dislikes, etc. I found her very easy to talk to and we stayed up late getting to know each other.

Sometime after midnight I told her I was spent and walked back to my new room. I frowned at the unpacked boxes and dreaded tomorrow, but pushed it to the back of my mind. I changed, flicked the light off and pulled the thick curtains together. With the curtains drawn the room became pitch black and I had trouble locating the bed. I searched blindly with my arms out in front of me, but my toe found it first. I yelped slightly, but it was quickly forgotten once I crawled into the bed. It was amazingly soft and I sunk into a peaceful sleep almost immediately.

I woke the next morning to rustling movement in the bed. I fought to stay asleep, but only seconds later felt the movement again. As my mind started to clear, I realized that I hadn't moved. At least I didn't think I had. I worked to open my heavy eyelids.

Only a touch of the morning's sun leaked into the room, but it was enough for me to see the form of a stranger - lying right next to me.

I screamed.

_Thanks for reading! Leave a review! Next chapter should be up in a few days._


	2. Chapter 2

_Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer stills owns, I still don't._

_A/N: Ok, so I messed with this chapter a lot. I went back and forth on different things and it got changed a few times in the process. I did the majority of the changes after my beta, herinfiniteeyes, returned it to me. Accordingly, if you see any errors they are on me, because she is awesome._

_..._

My limbs thrashed under the covers, trying to free myself from the bed when I felt the stranger's hand come over my mouth. He rolled so the weight of his body pressed against the full length of mine and I knew immediately I would not be able to get out from under him.

"Shhhh!" he told me. "You are going to wake up the entire building."

I continued to squirm underneath him and attempted to bite his hand.

"Just settle down for a second! I'm Edward, Alice's brother. Now calm down before you have the neighbors calling the cops!"

As his words slowly registered, I finally stilled myself enough to take a glimpse at his face. He looked nothing like Alice. His features were masculine and godlike compared to her girlish face, and his hair was a golden bronze color while hers was almost black. If it hadn't been for the emerald eyes that looked like they could cut glass I wouldn't have believed him, but they were identical to hers. And burning into mine.

I was suddenly very aware of his obviously toned body pressed firmly against mine.

"I'm going to move my hand now. Do you promise not to scream?" he asked me hesitantly.

I nodded.

"Good." He held his position for another few seconds before slowly removing his hand. I kept my promise and didn't scream, just swallowed thickly. A moment later he pulled himself away from me, sitting back on the bed.

"Listen, I'm really sorry about this. I talked to Alice just two days ago and she said she was still looking for a roommate. I came in late last night, I couldn't see a thing and just collapsed on the bed. I had no idea you would be in here. I didn't mean to frighten you." He held his hands up in front of him to prove his innocence.

I still hadn't moved from my frozen position lying back on the bed. I just laid there slightly in shock, staring at him. His story rang even more true as I took in his disheleved appearance. He was wearing dress pants and an untucked button up shirt, both of which were crinkled with sleep.

Finally not fearing for my life, I took the opprotunity to really look at him - and he was the most beautiful man I had ever seen. My heart refused to slow to its normal pace even after the threat was gone.

"Are you alright..?" he paused and looked at me pointedly, indicating he wanted me to give my name.

"Bella," I croaked out.

"Bella," he repeated. I suppressed a shiver of the sound of my name coming from his mouth. His voice was smooth and calming.

"I think so, just need to restart my heart." I placed my hand over my chest willing it to slow down.

He smiled at me and I watched as one side of his mouth went up a little higher than the other. My stomach did a somersault.

"Well, again, I'm terribly sorry about this. I'll excuse myself," he said as he lifted himself from the bed. He walked to the door and looked back at me over his shoulder before closing it behind him. As soon as it shut I let out a large gush of air.

I walked meekly into the living room 10 minutes later, after I had calmed myself down. I had covered my embarrassing ratty and thin t-shirt with an oversized UW sweatshirt and battled my crazy hair into a ponytail. Edward's long and lean body was folded into the couch, grasping a cup of coffee and reading the paper. His bed hair had been finger-styled into disarray and the sun coming from the balcony door was highlighting random strands. He looked like model sitting there. He glanced up at me and smiled, albeit a bit chagrined.

"Doing better?" he asked. All I could do was nod. _When did my ability to form sentences disappear?_

"There's more coffee in the kitchen," he gestured with his mug.

I didn't say anything, just headed into the kitchen but grabbed a glass of orange juice instead of coffee. I had a feeling caffeine would only make my frazzled state of mind much worse. I was debating whether I should join him in the living room or stay hidden in the kitchen when I heard Alice.

"Edward!" she exclaimed. I could hear her as plainly as I would have standing right next to her. "Why didn't you tell me you would be in today?"

"It was last minute. I have a meeting at headquarters in an hour." I heard him explain.

I decided to walk around the corner and join them. When Alice spotted me she jumped slightly from where she sat next to her brother on the couch.

"Oh, Bella! This is Ed.."

"We met already, Al," he told her, looking at me with that crooked grin that made my heart falter. I wondered how someone look so sexy after just rolling out of bed as I climbed into the chair and pulled my feet under me, nursing my juice.

"Oh, well, great! You'll love Bella, Edward; she is super nice. She's going to U Dub for English Lit. Oh, and she has an older brother, who happens to have this _sexy_ friend I got to meet yesterday." Edward grimaced when the word "sexy" came out of Alice's mouth but she didn't miss a beat. "Anyway, she's fairly new to Seattle so I think I will take her out tonight." She paused only for a fraction of a second before she added, "You should come! It's been so long since we have gotten to go out together."

"Maybe, I'll see how today goes," he told her before taking a sip of his coffee. My imagination went wild watching his lips form around the cup. I licked my lips unconsciously.

"What do you think, Bella? Up for a night out?" Alice turned to me.

I debated internally for a moment. I had a lot of unpacking to do, and after visiting the bare kitchen I evidently need to get some groceries. I was working my lip with my teeth, trying to hash everything out in my head when I noticed Edward was watching me from the corner of his eye. I let myself hope he was interested in my answer, that my agreement would effect his decision. With that thought, all reason left my mind and I looked up at Alice and said, "Sure."

"Fantastic!" she said hopping up. "I better go find something amazing to wear!" She skipped back to her room. Edward shook his head at her retreating figure.

When he returned his focus to the paper, I almost got up to leave but found I couldn't. There was a charged feeling in the room when Alice left. I also had a hard time keeping my eyes off him. Unfortunately his face was completely hidden by the paper, so I was forced to study the long slender fingers of his hand and the way they gripped the edges. I was lost in my thoughts, imagining the way they would feel when he suddenly spoke.

"So, you are studying English?" He lowered the paper and looked at me.

Taken back by his out-of-the-blue attempt to start conversation, all I could manage was a "Mmmhmm."

He nodded. "That was my minor. I loved it. U Dub has some great teachers in that department." His voice was silky and I fought to keep from openly swooning.

I just smiled back at him. It was evidently a good thing I was going to spend the next four years studying English, because it was certainly lost on me now.

He stared at me a moment longer before returning to his article. I smacked myself mentally. He was making an effort to talk to me and all I could do was mutter half-responses and bob my head up and down. Desperate to hear his voice again, I thought of a question.

"What did you major in?"

He looked back up at me, probably shocked I could string enough words together to form a sentence.

"Well, technically I didn't major or minor in anything. After I got my pilot's license, I decided to pursue aerodynamics, but my job has kept me from finishing any school."

I was about to follow up with another question, but Alice's voice ripped through the apartment.

"Bella!" she huffed loudly. "Where are all your real clothes? All I can find in here are jeans!"

Edward laughed and shook his head as I got up and made my way down the hall.

When I arrived in my room, half of my clothes were already on the floor behind Alice and the rest were flying over her head to join them piece by piece.

"Alice, jeans are real clothes. That's what I wear."

She shook her head vigorously. "No, no Bella. You can't wear jeans out. Don't you own a skirt or dress?"

"I might," I shrugged. "I'm pretty sure I wore a skirt to my grandma's funeral."

She pulled out a plain black pencil skirt and inspected it. "This? Bella, this isn't even your size. I bet it doesn't show your shape at all." It took flight to join the other rejections behind her.

She reached the bottom of my suitcase and looked up at me. "Let's go to my closet. I'm sure I can find something to fit you tonight and we can go shopping tomorrow." She hopped up and disappeared across the hall to her room before I could protest.

After fighting tooth and nail with Alice for over an hour about what I would wear, we finally agreed on the simplest black dress in her wardrobe. It was a little shorter and tighter than I liked, but it satisfied Alice's insane need to dress me up so I let it go.

Edward had popped his head into the room at one point to tell us a quick goodbye before he left for work. My gaze was glued to where he had stood against the doorframe for minutes after he left, until Alice flung another outfit at my head.

I returned to my room and picked clothes off the floor, arranging them in the drawers and closet. Then I set up my computer and unpacked my books before showering. I was wiggling my way into Alice's dress when I heard the phone ring. Alice answered it in the other room.

"Awww, come on Edward! Can't you fly out tomorrow morning?" she whined. After a moment she gave a few pouty responses of "Fine," "Yeah" and "Bye."

I let out a sigh of disappointment and sat down on the bed, bummed that her brother wouldn't be joining us. Suddenly trying to get into the dress wasn't worth the fight. I was surprised my mood had plummeted so quickly at the news. Alice appeared at my door.

"So, Edward can't come. He has to fly out tonight," she sulked.

"What does he do?" I couldn't stop the question from flying out of my mouth. I didn't know Alice well enough to guess what her reaction to my interest in her brother would be, but I didn't want to start out on the wrong foot with her. Luckily, she didn't seem to think my question was anything out of the ordinary.

"He works for a firm that builds aircrafts. Growing up, all he ever talked about was becoming a pilot and flying planes. Then after he graduated and got his license he really got into the mechanics of it all. He travels a lot looking for the newest equipment designs for his company. He doesn't keep a place because it would be useless, just stays with family and friends or hotels wherever he goes." She said this almost sadly.

After a moment she shrugged and her voice perked up. "He loves it though, and the company is based here in Seattle so he stays here when he's in town." She looked at me. "That's fine with you that he sleeps here, right? He's a really good guy."

"Of course, it's fine," I told her.

"Good." She looked up at me and noticed my half-dressed state. "Well, lets get you into that dress!"

I stood when she approached so we could work together to get the dress on. I forced all hopes of getting to know Edward better from my mind. His job obviously didn't lend itself to a relationship. After a moment in rare silence, Alice gasped.

"Bella, I just had the best idea! We should call Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper to come out with us!"

I shrugged. "I don't know if Rose will be up to it, but we can call them."

"Great!" she replied, spotting my phone on my nightstand then grabbing and handing it to me.

That night everyone met at a bar a couple of blocks from our apartment. Everyone was already there when we showed up due to Alice's last-ditch effort to put makeup on me. I was dangerously close to strangling her before she gave up.

We got drinks, found a table near the bar and talked easily together. After a while Rosalie said she was up for a slow dance and Emmett led her to the floor. Jasper asked Alice if she would like to dance and as they left, he twirled her before pulling her close against him. I sighed and decided I needed another drink. I was leaning forward on the bar waiting when I felt a hand lightly land on the small of my back.

I turned to see a tall muscular man with short, sandy blond hair standing next to me. He slid money to the bartender for my drink, his eyes never leaving mine. I normally would have brushed his hand away and refused to let him buy the drink, but I was a little on the woozy side and he was good-looking enough. I smiled at him and downed my free drink in one gulp. Probably not smart.

"Dance?" he asked me, one eyebrow pulled into an arch.

"Sure," I replied and let him lead me to the dance floor.

He wrapped his arms around my waist and rocked back and forth to the music with me. Our cheeks touched as he lowered his mouth close to my ear and whispered, "What's your name?"

"Bella," I replied.

"James?" I heard Emmett's voice approaching.

My dancing partner lifted his head and recognition dawned on him at the sight of my brother. He released me and turned to Emmett.

"Hey. Emmett, right? How are you?" They shook hands.

"Good! Well, actually great. I got a little one on the way," Emmett grinned. It was so cute to see him thrilled at the prospect of being a dad.

"Congrats, man." James patted his arm.

"Thanks. So, what have you been up to, other than dancing with my little sister?"

James seemed a little shocked at this news, but Emmett punched his arm playfully. "It's fine, dude. She's a big girl."

James looked back to me and grinned.

We spent the remainer of the night chatting and having fun, James joining our group for the rest of the evening. Before we all stumbled out of the bar at an ungodly hour, I gave James my number at his request. It wasn't something I did often but I had consumed a generous amount of alcohol, and he knew Emmett, so I let my guard down a little.

I wouldn't admit to myself that it also helped distract me from the gorgeous man who wasn't available or interested in me.

James POV

On her way home Bella stumbled slightly on the sidewalk, but grabbed her friend's arm to steady herself before throwing her head back in laughter. She was so beautiful and I longed to have her tonight, but ground my teeth together and willed myself to be patient. It would only be a matter of time. I couldn't wipe the smile off my face at how easily everything had gone tonight.

_I slammed my fifth drink down on the bar, tossed money at the bartender and decided tonight was a waste of time. Just as I was about to turn away to leave, I noticed her walking toward the other end of the bar. I knew as soon as I saw her she had to be mine. The way she looked in that dress, and the way she had no idea how she looked in it, blew me away. _

_I tried to hide my enthusiasm and paced myself as I approached. I couldn't stop my hand from automatically drifting to the small of her back. Her petite frame felt fabulous against my skin and longed for more contact. Her face initially seemed reluctant and I feared momentarily that she would refuse me. Rejection was not acceptable._

_"Dance?" I asked, then watched victoriously as her guard lowered and she allowed it. _

_"Sure." Ahh, what a beautiful voice. _

_We found rhythm and swayed to it. Her body felt glorious pressed against mine. I needed to know everything about her. I deliberately took my time lowering my mouth to her ear and once it was there I had to fight everything in me to not to draw it into my mouth. _

_"What's your name?" I purred into it instead. _

_"Bella," she whispered back. Bella. _My Bella_._

_"James?" I heard my name being called. Furious that someone sought to interrupt this moment with my Bella, I turned to find the fool who I may or may not destroy later. I managed to make my face presentable as I recognized a familiar face from the academy. Only a follow officer would be overlooked in this instance. As I took his hand, his name pooped into my mind._

_"Hey. Emmett, right? How are you?" I asked, feigning interest, hoping he would say fine and take his exit. I was not so fortunate._

_"Good! Well, actually great. I got a little one on the way," he grinned like a fool. _

_"Congrats, man," I told him, hoping this would be enough for him. I wanted to get back to the beautiful brunette next to me. _Bella_._

_"Thanks. So, what have you been up to, other than dancing with my little sister?" he asked with a smirk._

_Bella was Emmett's sister? I fought the immediate urge to remove the obstacle he would undoubtably create. Luckily, for his own sake, he didn't seem interested in keeping us apart. _

_"It's fine dude. She's a big girl."_

_It was just as well anyway. He may have had an inch or two on me, but wasn't really any match. I could have him begging for his life in a matter of seconds. Finally I turned back to my Bella._

_At the end of the night, she had scribbled her number on a napkin and handed it to me before she left. I smiled at her triumphantly as she turned to leave, knowing she was as good as mine._

I kept a block and a half behind her, watching her slight form as she turned to go into her building. I looked at it with a grin as I reached it a minute later. I would have to find out which apartment was hers, but I could worry about that later. I had her number, and soon I would have her.

_A/N #2: I promise I won't always repeat the exact same scene when I do James' POV, but I wanted to do it here so you could see the stark difference between the exterior of James that Bella sees and what is actually going on in his head. I plan on doing the story in Bella's POV with a little tid bit from James at the end in most chapters. I may post some outtakes from Edward's POV of certain chapters later if I get enough interest._

_So thanks for reading and suffering through this longer than intended note. Now be a dear and drop me a review!_


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight.**

**A/N: Thanks to herinifiniteeyes who takes the time to beta my story even though she is crazy busy.**

**LoisBlue at Twilighted made me a banner. :) She is super nice and talented. I have a link to it on my profile, go check it out.**

**I honestly mean to undate so much quicker than I have been but the last couple of weeks have been kinda crazy. I am trying to figure out some sort of posting schedule, so stick with me.**

My hand blindly squatted a few times in the general area of the alarm clock before finally completing it's mission. I rolled back over and groaned, suddenly not excited about starting college in the least.

It was my first day. The week before Alice had taken me to the campus and shown me where all of my classes were located to make the day go smoother. She was starting her Sophomore year and was familiar with the numerous buildings. She also insisted we would ride together because my truck "needed all the rest it could get."

I had learned many things about Alice during the first two weeks. 1) Never ask something that you don't want a possible 30 minute answer to; 2) Don't expect her to take any less than two hours to get ready; and most importantly, 3) Never ever go shopping with her. I had made the mistake once, but I was a quick learner and after that avoided any and all retail when in her presence.

All in all, though, Alice was great. She obviously cared greatly for all of those in her life, which now seemed to include myself - and Jasper. They had spent no more than two days apart since meeting during my move. They seemed to really compliment each other. Jasper's calm disposition to her exuberant love for life balanced them well.

I finally forced myself from the bed and made my way toward the bathroom, but not before clipping my shoulder on the doorframe while exiting my room. I hissed loudly. That would show me to defy my clumsiness by trying to navigate with my eyes only partially open.

Still rubbing my shoulder I grabbed the door handle of the bathroom and stumbled in, only to almost collide with a half naked man. Edward. The Greek god himself was standing in front of the mirror with only a towel wrapped loosely around his waist. My squinty eyes suddenly had no problem being stretched to their limits. My hand flew up to cover my gaping mouth as I took a step back and pulled the door shut with a very loud bang.

I rolled to lean my back against the wall right next to the door and was pretty sure I heard Edward snickering on the other side.

"Oh my god, Edward, I am so sorry. I didn't know you where here," I apologized through the door.

He walked out then, still modeling his towel. As soon as I saw him I snapped my eyes shut in an effort to keep them from bulging from their sockets.

"Again, sorry," I mumbled.

"No problem. We're even now." I could practically hear his smirk. When I opened my eyes he was still standing directly in front of me. I begged my knees not to buckle beneath me.

"I didn't mean to occupy your restroom, but I knew better than to ask to use Alice's. If you don't mind, I'll finish getting ready in your room so you can get your shower," he offered. I had forgotten how unbelievably smooth his voice was. I just nodded before he walked toward my room holding a bag in his right hand. I said a silent prayer there wasn't anything super embarrassing lying on my floor.

It was a struggle to keep him out of my mind during my shower, wondering how long he would be in town. I had to keep reminding myself the reason I couldn't fall for Edward. Or rather, the many reasons.

After I successfully bathed and dressed without any more run-ins with Edward, I headed to the kitchen for breakfast. I saw him from the corner of my eye as I passed the living room into the kitchen and noticed he looked similar to the last time I saw him, drinking coffee and reading the paper.

Once in the kitchen I decided I was in the mood for more than just cereal. I pulled out the makings for French toast, my favorite breakfast. I told myself it was to celebrate my first day of college, not to impress the incredibly gorgeous guy sitting on the couch.

Alice bounded into the living and greeted Edward as I was finishing. I poked my head around the corner.

"There is French toast if you guys are interested."

Alice started to sprint towards the kitchen but stopped to look at Edward who remained seated. She turned and grabbed his hand, pulling him behind her.

"Edward, Bella is a great cook. Trust me, you want some French toast."

As they passed me on their way into the kitchen he looked at me and asked "Are you sure there is enough?"

"Plenty," I smiled at him, pleased I was able to answer verbally this time.

He sat down next to Alice. Before he took his first bite he gave me a worried look, but as soon as it was in his mouth his eyes closed as he let out a little groan.

"I told you so," Alice elbowed him.

"Do you know how long its been since I have had something for breakfast that didn't come wrapped in plastic from a store?" He took another bite excitedly.

"Glad you like it," I replied.

"So, how long are you in for this time?" Alice asked him. I looked up at him, very interested in the answer as well.

"Well, actually, if it's alright with you two, it might be a week or two." He met my eyes, looking for my reaction.

"Fine with me," I said as nonchalantly as possible.

"That's great Edward!" Alice cheered from her seat.

Edward smiled at her before taking another bite.

My first day of classes went fairly smoothly. Of course, it was just the first day, so I didn't expect anything too hectic to happen. I had actually spent most of the day deciding what I wanted to make for dinner. I had a desperate need to hear Edward make the yummy groan again.

When Alice and I returned home from classes and approached our door, I noticed a box propped up against it. Alice ran too it and scooped it up, studying the label. Her face lit up.

"Bella, this is addressed to you! It is from a florist!"

I unlocked the door and let Alice open them while I fetched a vase.

"Oh!" she cried. "They are so beautiful!" She started pulling out tons of daisies and arranging them in the vase while I pulled the card.

Congrats on your first day of college. Can't wait to hear how it went. Yours - James

I smiled at the card before handing it to Alice who was about to burst with curiosity.

"How sweet is he?!" she crooned after reading the card then placing it on the clear stick in the middle of the bouquet.

James and I had actually only seen each other once since the night we met. He had called me a few days after and we had gotten coffee together. He was overly polite and we got along fairly nicely.

He told me that he had been promoted to detective from his uniform job a couple of weeks ago. He had lived in Seattle his entire life and met Emmett at the academy but had lost touch since. He lived not too far from my new place.

I told him about moving from Forks, how I was excited about starting college and about my new and chaotic roommate. We seemed to hit it off, but I was fairly new to dating and told him so. He said he understood, and we agreed to take it slow. He was planning on accompanying me to Emmett's cook out this weekend.

I felt bad for spending the day thinking about Edward when James was somewhere thinking about me, but I was positive it was impossible _not_ to spend the day thinking about him when you saw him in a towel.

I decided on my spicy chicken stir-fry for dinner. When Edward came in the door around six and smelled the aromas coming from the kitchen, he made his way to me immediately.

"Wow, Bella, that smells great," he told me as he came to a stop over my shoulder and peaked down at the food. My body had the strangest of urges and I could barely keep myself from leaning back into him. I was grateful he moved a moment later as I wasn't sure of my willpower.

I glanced at him from the corner of my eye as he grabbed plates from the cabinet and the urge to touch him came back tenfold. He was wearing dress pants with a shirt and tie that he had loosened a bit around the neck, his top button undone.

He walked ahead of me to the table and set out three plates while I placed the stir-fry on the table.

"Who are the flowers from?" he asked eyeing them.

"Oh, from James. A guy I met a couple of weeks ago," I explained.

"What's the occasion?"

"My first day of college?" It came out more like a question than an answer and I blushed furiously.

He looked up at me and smiled while he placed utensils and napkins next plates. "Sounds like he's pretty smitten," he suggested.

"I don't know, we just met," I shrugged, not wanting him to think I was serious about James. I don't know why it mattered really. Edward was out of my reach.

He just smiled in return.

Alice made her timely entrance then and we all sat down to eat. She filled Edward in on her day, which I had only half listened to since I had heard most of it on the way back from campus. Finally, she turned her interest to Edward.

"So, how are things at work?" she asked.

He shrugged. "Same as always. There are a few conferences at headquarters they want me present for over the next couple of weeks, so I am getting a bit of a break from all the travel."

"Are you going to be able to visit mom and dad while you are here?"

"I am hoping so."

Her eyes widened suddenly. "Hey! You should come with Bella and me to her brother's cook out this weekend! The new guy I am dating, Jasper, is going to be there and I know you two would hit it off. He just got out of the Air Force."

"Really?" Edward's eyebrows went up. "Well, I will try." He moved his eyes to mine. "That fine with you, Bella?"

"Yeah, sure," I said.

Edward stood to load seconds onto his plate. "Hope he cooks as well as you," he winked at me.

He _winked_. I forced a smile out while trying to get my galloping heart back to a healthy rate.

After dinner Alice and Edward insisted on taking care of the dishes for me. I went back to my room and changed into gray lounge pants and a band t-shirt. I sent James a quick text thanking him for the beautiful flowers before deciding to read my syllabi. I was attempting to stay clear of Edward for the rest of the night in hopes of clearing my head of him. It was impossible to think of anything but him in his presence.

Only 20 minutes later Alice was banging on my door telling me we were all going to watch some movies. I rolled my eyes but didn't argue, because my will was wavering anyway.

I sat on one end of the couch, across from Alice who lowered the overhead light with a remote while Edward loaded the movie he had picked. After it started up, he surprisingly took the spot between us instead of the chair.

Sitting so close to him was terrible and wonderful at the same time. My hand would involuntarily twitch every few minutes, wanting physical contact, while his scent enveloped me. I couldn't label the smell, just really fresh, almost like mountains and sunshine, but with something entirely his own.

I was glad I had seen the movie already because it was pointless to try and focus on it. Every time he would move, smile or laugh I had to fight the urge to look directly at him. Toward the end of the movie I could hear Alice's soft snoring on the other end of the couch. I leaned past Edward to look at her and smiled. She was infamous for falling asleep on the couch, I guessed because even she didn't realize how much energy it took to be her.

When I started to lean back into the couch, I noticed Edward watching me.

"Must be so tiring to be her," I told him.

He chuckled lightly. "Yes, I would imagine so."

He stopped talking but continued to stare at me with the corner of his mouth pulled up. All I could do was stare back and I couldn't even tell you what expression I had on my face. Just before one of my ribs cracked from the internal erratic pounding they were receiving, he turned away.

We both started watching the movie again like nothing happened. I tried to dissect the stare, the crooked smile and the ridiculous pull I felt toward him. Why would my heart lead me toward failure? There was no way I could have him. There was no way he would even want me to have him. I sighed loudly. He noticed and turned towards me and I really did try to fight the blush, but it betrayed me like always.

Luckily the credits began rolling not a moment later and I gave him a quick "good night" and walked swiftly back to my room and closed the door, then leaned against it for support.

A beep came from my phone on the bed. I walked over to it and saw I had a new message from James.

"You're welcome. Call me tonight and fill me in if you have time."

I glanced at the clock which read 11:15 p.m. I knew I probably wouldn't wake him, but I didn't feel up to the conversation. I ingored the text and vowed to call him tomorrow before my first library shift. I flicked off the light and collapsed on the bed.

James POV

I spent the entire night with my phone in my hand, willing it to ring and trying not to crush it with my impatience. When midnight rolled around, I knew she had ignored my message. I furiously grabbed my jacket and stormed out the door, headed to her place. I wanted to be there and in my spot before she left in the morning. I hadn't seen her since she left campus with her pogo stick of a roommate this afternoon and I needed to see her.

I sat in the fire escape staircase and caught a few hours of sleep before the alarm on my phone jolted me awake at 8:40. I rose from my spot, peeked through the narrow, rectangular glass on the door and waited for her to exit. I knew her first class started at 9:10 and that it would take her 15 minutes to arrive at school, and she had left at approximately 8:50 yesterday.

I had to wait for a few minutes, but at exactly 8:49, she strolled out of her apartment with the roommate in toll. I smiled when I saw her. Her hair was pulled up today with a blue tank top and I could see every inch of her beautiful face and the lovely curve of her slender neck. I couldn't wait to trace my finger along that curve. I was still smiling at the image when the door opened again. I frowned and narrowed my eyes, because I was positive there was only one roommate. I also knew from my check on the apartment that it was only a two bedroom.

When a tall guy in a expensive looking suit strode out my jaw clinched in blinding anger. Who the _fuck_ was he? Was he the reason my Bella didn't call me last night? Why the hell was he in the apartment I had not yet been invited into?

I turned and swiftly descended the stairs and into the parking lot just in time to see him step into a black Mercedes. I made note of the license plate number and placed it my pocket. When my shift started in a few hours, I would know everything about him.

Just like I knew everything about Alice Cullen.

Just like I knew everything about Charlie, Renee, Emmett and Rosalie Swan.

Just like I knew everything about Isabelle Marie Swan. My Bella.

_Hope the wait was worth it. Thanks again to all of you who have added me to your faves/alerts. Please take a sec and leave me a review, let me know what ya think!_


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and it's characters. **

**A/N: MANY thanks to herinifiniteeyes for betaing. She is amazing, pushing me to write something better. Her stories are fantastic, go check them out.**

The next day's classes proved to be the same as the day before - not very exciting. Listening to my professor discuss the finer points of writing technics, I fought to keep my attention focused. It was hard considering I was more than familiar with his lesson, having heard this in AP English last year in high school.

The only thing unfamiliar at this point was large class size. I had never seen a "classroom" this big before. In Forks, there had only been 20 or so kids per class. This room felt like a stadium rather than a classroom, and the sea of students that occupied it made me feel minuscule.

After my last class I made my way back to my truck as I searched for my phone in my purse. I had driven because I had my first library shift and Alice decided to spend the evening with Jasper.

I threw my bag and books in ahead of me before I climbed onto my bench seat. After I located my phone I dialed James' number. I wanted to thank him for the beautiful and thoughtful flowers he had sent and I had an hour or so to kill before I had to be at work.

"Hello?" his deep voice sounded into my ear.

"Hey, it's Bella. You're not busy are you?"

"No, of course not. What did you need?"

"Nothing really. I am waiting for my shift to start and wanted to call and tell you how beautiful the flowers are. You really didn't have to do that," I told him.

"I know," he said, and I could hear his smile through the phone."So what did you think? Do you like college so far?"

"I like it alright, I guess," I told him. I didn't want to tell him how unexciting it was. It would sound arrogant considering I was only two days in.

"How long do you have until you have to be at work?" he asked.

"'Bout an hour."

"Well, I've got some free time. There is a great little deli a few blocks from you. Want to meet me there and grab a quick bite?"

I bit my lip. Sandwiches were pretty innocent, right?

"Sure," I told him.

The deli wasn't busy considering it was just a little after 3:00 in the afternoon, so I spotted James easily. He was waiting for me at a table toward the back clad in a suit and tie, so I assumed he was on duty.

As I got closer I realized there were already two sandwiches on the table. I raised my eyebrows at him, a small smile on my lips.

.

"You ordered for me?" I asked, pretending to be offended by the gesture.

He smiled back. "Had to, this is the best sandwich in Seattle."

I sat across from him and eyed the sub. I looked back up at him, then back down at the sandwich before finally picking it up and taking a bite.

It was amazing.

"Wow," I said, trying to keep my eyes from rolling back into my head. "This _is_ really good."

"Told you," he smirked before taking a bite of his own.

"So, this place is a favorite of yours?" I asked.

He nodded. "My partner and I come here a lot. Great sandwiches." He watched as I took another bite.

"And where is your partner now?" I asked.

"At the station. Slow day," he replied.

"That is a good thing," I told him.

He smiled and nodded, "Yes, a very good thing."

"So, do you like your partner?" I asked, trying to pace myself with the sandwich. It was delicious and I was starving. I hadn't eaten lunch due to the very filling chocolate chip muffins I had made for breakfast this morning. Edward had eaten them so fast I thought he might make himself sick. I smiled at the memory.

"What?" James asked me.

"Hmm?" I said, trying to clear Edward from my mind.

"You were smiling," he told me.

"Oh, it's nothing." I willed myself not to blush, but pretty sure I failed.

James looked like he was trying to hold back a frown. I changed the subject fast.

"Anyway, your partner?" I asked.

"Right," he said, and the face disappeared. "He's ok I guess. He has been on the job for a while, thinks he knows everything. That kind of person can grate on you a little bit, but it's manageable."

"Well, I'm glad you get along. It would be awful to be stuck with someone day after day that you couldn't stand," I said.

He smiled in return. "So what is your favorite class?"

I thought for a moment. "I don't know yet. Not sure I have gotten far enough into them to know. I still haven't had any assignments." The last statement came out almost like a complaint.

He smiled a knowing smile at me. "You are bored, aren't you?"

Wow, he was observant. "Only because it hasn't picked up yet," I tried to explain. "I know it will be better further into the semester."

He smiled and shook his head before taking another bite. We finished the remainder of our food quietly after that. Any time I chanced a look at him, he was looking back with a smile on his lips.

He seemed like a decent guy. He didn't seem to mind that we were taking it so slow anyway. Moreover, he was attractive in his own right. His light hair was cropped short, and he had very intense gray eyes that reminded me of a brewing storm for some reason. He was tall and obviously built, and could wear a suit very well, even if it did scream cop.

Then a memory of Edward in a suit walking into the kitchen this morning infiltrated my assessment and clouded my mind. Guilt shot through me. It was unfair to compare Edward to James. It was unfair to compare Edward to anyone - he was in a different league.

Mostly it was unfair to compare them as far as I was concerned, because only one of them was interested in me. Even if by some miracle Edward was interested in me, his job made things impossible.

I looked up at James again, who was still studying me in return.

"I'm glad you came, Bella," he said.

"Me too," I told him honestly.

He glanced at his watch. "We better get going. Your shift starts soon and I better get back to work."

I nodded and stood as he grabbed both trays and discarded them. He walked me to my truck silently and when we reached it I turned to him, not sure what I should do before departing. We hadn't really touched after the coffee date, but surely he would expect some contact this time.

James smiled, noting my obvious nervousness, and placed his hands lightly on either side of my arms. He leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on my cheek then pulled back, leaving his hands.

"See you this weekend?" he asked, looking into my eyes.

I smiled and nodded. He gently squeezed my arms before dropping his hands. He turned and started toward his unmarked but still conspicuous police car.

"Thanks for the sandwich," I said to his retreating form.

He spun toward me but continued walking away backwards. "No problem," he said, and then winked at me before turning back around.

I got into my truck and tried to ignore the disappointment that his wink didn't affect me like the one I had gotten yesterday.

My first day at the library, contrary to my first day at college, was overwhelming. It wasn't like the small library in Forks; it was four times the size and full of students and teachers. There was always someone to assist, books to return to their proper shelves or people waiting to in line to check something out. I learned by jumping in headfirst. I left five hours later feeling slightly frazzled, thankful my first shift wasn't any longer than that.

When I came into the apartment I found Edward sitting on the couch with his feet propped up on the coffee table and a computer in his lap. It was the most causal I had seen him, in just a t-shirt and jeans.

He looked up as I entered and I grimaced internally at what I must look like after my long day.

"Hey, Bella," he smiled before looking back down. "Alice isn't back yet."

"Oh yeah?" was all I could say in return, because all that was running through my mind was that I was alone with Edward in the apartment.

I placed my books down on the table and went into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge. I needed to get out of here. I didn't want to hide in my room for the rest of the evening; I was afraid it would look rude even if it did seem like he was working. However, I couldn't very well sit in the living room with him. I chugged some water.

It wasn't like I minded being around him; the problem was I liked it too much. I didn't see the point of torturing myself with his proximity.

Laundry! I needed a trip to the laundry mat desperately anyway. I turned and walked back to my room and gathered my dirty clothes into my bag quickly. On my way out I grabbed my worn copy of Chaucer poems.

I paused when I reached the living room. "I'm going to run down to the laundry mat. I'll see you later."

I started to turn but froze when I heard his voice.

"Really? Want some company? I've got tons to do."

I slowly turned back to him and smiled. "Sure." I wanted to jump for joy and run away at the same time.

Only ten minutes and a silent ride in his Mercedes later, we stood side by side loading our prospective machines. I was trying to get my unmentionables into my washer without him noticing them when I heard him sigh loudly.

I looked over to see him wearing a frown and shaking his head as he held a shirt up in front of him.

As he started to wad up the shirt I asked, "What's the matter?"

He stalked toward the garbage as he mumbled, "Another stained shirt." Just as he was about to stuff it into the can I ran to his side and took the shirt from him. My hand briefly touched his and that innocent graze was all it took for my face to heat up.

"Don't throw it away," I told him. "It's just a stain."

I turned and walked back to my bag to fish out my stain remover and took the opportunity to calm myself down.

Pulling out my stain stick I went to work on his shirt. I could feel rather than see his presence over my shoulder, but I focused all my energy into the stain. "So is that how you handle all your stains?" I asked. "Just toss the shirt?"

"Yes," I heard him answer behind me.

I shook my head and laughed, a little nervously due to his closeness.

"Alice is always getting me more clothes than I need anyway," he replied.

I snorted slightly. "I believe you."

Satisfied that I had worked the stain well enough, I turned to hand it back to him and was surprised at just how close he was actually standing.

I locked eyes with him and we were caught in a stare similar to the one the night before on the couch during the movie. It was a weird feeling, like I was stuck there by some unseen force. The corner of his mouth pulled up slightly and I prayed he would look away so I could do the same. I felt like I was bearing my soul to him and couldn't make myself move.

Finally I steeled myself and held out the shirt for him, swallowing thickly. "This should do it." I still couldn't remove my eyes from his.

At last he lowered his eyes to the shirt and accepted it from me. "Thanks," he said, still smiling lopsidedly as he turned to place it in the wash with the rest of his clothes.

I started my machine and dropped into a chair close to it. Thankfully Edward left a seat between us as he sat down and he pulled out his laptop. There was no way I would be able to focus on anything but him if he sat so close to me again.

I grabbed my book and opened it to the beginning, sighing in contentment at the distraction it promised. I always lost myself in my old favorites.

However, I had never tried to read a book around Edward. I was slightly aggravated with myself, that this guy that I barely knew could absorb all my attention, even when not in my presence. I would catch myself looking at him from the corner of my eye as he worked quietly on his computer, and would subsequently scold myself for being so weak.

"Homework?" I heard him ask as I re-started the first poem, _again_.

"No, an old favorite, actually," I told him. I wouldn't allow myself a glance at him in fear I wouldn't be able to look away again. He probably thought something was wrong with me after I stared at him like a moron twice in as many days.

"Favorite?" he asked. "You like Chaucer?"

I knew I would have to look at him now. I met his glance slowly. "Yes." Was it that hard to believe?

"Hmph," was all he said in return.

I returned my eyes to _The House of Fame _and started again. I made it all the way to the second page before he interrupted me again.

"What others are ranked among your favorites?"

I looked up at him. "There are quite a few. As far as poets go, I would have to say Oscar Wilde and E. E. Cummings."

"Wilde is amazing," he nodded.

I bit my lip as I studied him. Was he being serious? "I didn't know guys liked poetry."

"But your favorite poets you just mentioned are all men," he countered.

"True," I shrugged. "Just not very common."

"Frost, Poe, Hayden..." he started naming off male poets.

I laughed. "I meant there aren't many guys that like poetry, especially younger ones. I know that there are an abundance of male poets."

He seemed to be studying me with his eyes narrowed the slightest bit. Just as I feared I was about to be caught in another terrifying stare down, his phone rang.

"Excuse me for a moment," he said as he stood. I followed his movements as walked out the door.

Twenty minutes and two of Chaucer's old poems later he had still not returned. Our machines sounded a few seconds apart indicating the end of the cycle, drawing my attention. I got up and placed both of our loads into dryers, but inspected the shirt of Edward's I had treated first. I wanted to make sure I was successful in removing the stain. Finding no trace of it, I smiled to myself and placed it into the dryer before starting it.

I turned back toward my seat but froze as I noticed Edward standing a few feet from me.

I gasped slightly and my hand instinctively went over my chest.

"There you are," I breathed out. "Everything ok?"

"Just work," he shrugged. "Thanks for taking care of my laundry."

"No problem," I told him as I started another load of my own clothes. He followed my lead.

I shoved my coins into the slot starting my washer and returned to my seat. Edward returned his focus to his computer as I attempted to read again but failed miserably.

James POV

My Bella was smart. I had figured as much, watching her travel from building to building between classes. She seemed bored or disappointed.

My observations proved to be correct as she confirmed them during our lunch date. She had been so beautiful today. The way she made conversation so easy, made me forget about everything else in the world.

However the bright memories of my afternoon were jaded after witnessing her with Edward Cullen. He was obviously a threat. I watched them in the laundry mat and tried to guess his angle.

I had discovered from his plates that the car he drove was a rental under the name Advanced Kinetics, Inc., apparently his employer. Their website had made my inquiry easy as they had an entire page dedicated to their "Tech Manager." A quick person search told me he did not have a permanent residence, at least in the US, and I assumed the reason for his presence in Bella's apartment was linked to Alice, his younger sister. If I had done a better job researching Alice I would have been prepared for him. I could not allow any more mistakes on my part.

My temper barely contained, I watched as they chatted back and forth throughout the night, as they unconsciously moved toward each other in conversation. I considered possible ways to be rid of his presence. Many of them entailed violence and though the thought pleased me more than anything, I couldn't chance it. From what I learned from his company's website, he was a go-getter, and seemingly very loyal. Moreover, his body language toward my Bella was inviting. He would no doubt inform her of any threats or warnings he received from me.

Regrettably I started listing more covert ways in my mind to end any connection they might be developing. Obviously the most laid-back approach would be to wait out his visit. He was a very busy man and would inevitably leave again, leaving Bella behind. _For me._

The down side to that path was that it left room for error. If I let them to continue in this manner, when he left it would leave the possibility there. Hope for something more. I couldn't allow her to hope for more.

I was also not sure how long he would be here. I could easily gather this information in an unsuspecting manner during the event at Emmett's while making small talk with Alice. Even if he left tomorrow, I didn't like the scenario. I wanted a clean break.

The best solution, or second best as a good beating would be the first, would be simply to insert myself in her life. I would have to be a bit more aggressive than I'd been, but I was sure I could do it smoothly enough that she would hardly notice.

The second step would be shouldering out Edward. It would take a lot of time and a lot of digging, but I would gather anything and everything on him. Twist it to make even the good things look bad. In my mind I could already see her face of disgust as I innocently dropped nasty tidbits about him.

My plan had momentarily distracted me from the hatred that spun through me when I watched the man in question step outside with his phone pressed to his ear. My open window allowed partial sentences to reach me and I concurred that it was a business call. What bothered me more than anything was his reflex to look back into the laundry mat every minute or so. He seemed put out with his call and longed to rejoin my Bella.

My plan was _definitely_ necessary.

**A/N #2: This was my favorite chapter so far. I wanted to show her with both guys and how it would be easy for her to be confused. While things are easy with James, there is no real spark for her. With Edward, the spark is there (BIG TIME), making things feel awkward and tense. Their connection is powerful and neither know quite how to approach such a thing. **

**With laying James' plan out so clearly here I hope you have a better idea of where this story is headed. James is a serial stalker, and this is definitely not his first time.**

**And finally, I am so grateful for all of you that have added my story to your alerts/faves, and even more grateful to those of you who have taken the time to review. It means a lot to me... so... do it again!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and it's characters. I own a account and a restless mind (and sadly neither of them pay me anything).**

**A/N: Per usual, herinifiniteeyes did a kickass job betaing. Thanks :)**

Blood violently pulsing through my head pulled me from slumber Friday morning. At least that's what it felt like. I grabbed my head with both hands and mentally cursed Alice for convincing me last night that margaritas were the perfect way to celebrate my first completed week of college.

I slowly eased my head toward the direction of my clock to check the time. Even though I did not have any classes today, I did have to be at the library at 11:00 a.m. and I couldn't remember if I had set my alarm. If fact, I couldn't remember a lot from last night. Luckily the clock's red digital numbers displayed it was only 9:47 a.m.

Oddly enough, right beside the clock was a glass of water and two Tylenol. How on earth had that gotten there? More importantly, how had I gotten into my bed? The last thing I remembered from the night before was listening to loud music with Alice, doubled over in laughter on the couch. We had spent the entire evening there talking and singing along with our favorite CDs. I somehow always ended up losing my resolve around her. She brought a side of me out that I usually held back, but I found I was enjoying letting loose. Aside from the headache I was now enduring.

I swallowed the Tylenol along with the entire glass of water. Maybe Alice had already been up and had put them there for me, considering the last time she drank she was her usual bright and happy self the next morning.

My phone beeped from my bedside and I groaned as I reached for it. It had been in my bedroom unattended since I had walked in yesterday evening when Alice approached me with her plans. Flipping open the phone I saw I had three text messages, all from James.

The first one read, "Thinking of you, give me a call," followed by, "Don't forget about me." The last one read, "Please call me ASAP so I know you're ok." I couldn't help but laugh at the last one. I should've known better than to get involved with a cop. They always assume the worst possible scenario. Emmett had presumed me dead in a ditch too many times to count whenever I didn't return his calls immediately.

Despite my head's protest not to concentrate on anything, especially the small texting letters on my phone, I sent a message to him stating, "I'm fine. Sorry I didn't call last night, I was with Alice. Talk to you later."

I immediately got a response. "Glad you are alright. Have a good day at work." I smiled at his sweet concern then replaced my phone on the nightstand. I only had a few more minutes to collect myself before I would have to make myself start getting ready for work.

**X**

In the shower I keep glancing at Edward's shampoo bottle that now stood next to mine from the corner of my eye. I don't know who I thought I was fooling by trying not to look at it; I was the only one in there. I was consumed by the curiosity of how much of his wonderful scent was from this bottle and what was his. Finally I grabbed the bottle and popped the top open. I quickly noticed the "fresh" smell I usually picked up from him, but that was it. I returned the bottle to its place, careful to face it the right direction so he wouldn't know I had handled it. Apparently, everything else was just _him_.

Huh.

**X**

The library was crazy as usual, if not more so do to the lack of Friday classes. Books and DVDs being brought back in were stacked all around the desk and I spent most of the day replacing them. It allowed me to keep to myself and more importantly away from the large number of needy college students.

I gathered the next batch of books that were due in the Early Childhood Education section and made my way there. I glanced at one of the books in my hand, noticed it went on the highest shelf and sulked. I hated the top shelf. I couldn't reach it on my own and going to get the ladder made me feel like a child, being I was the only employ who even needed it.

I glared at the shelf, willing it to be closer. I placed my foot on the lip of the bottom of the shelving unit and reached. I almost had the bottom of the book above the edge of the top shelf when a hand from behind me finished shoving it into place.

I twirled around to see a smirking James. Slightly shocked I stepped back but immediately felt the bookshelf against my back. James kept his hand perched against the upper shelf and leaned against it as he hovered over me, practically molded to my front. My face grew hot at our intimate position.

"Don't they have a step ladder you can use?" he asked, his eyes slightly smoldering.

"Uh, yeah. I just... didn't want to have to go get it," I stammered. He smiled in return for a long silent moment.

"So, what brings you to the U Dub Library?" I asked finally.

"You," he stated, his tone added the 'of course.'

If possible my face flamed hotter. Even though James made his attraction to me known, I couldn't get used to how blunt he was sometimes.

"Oh," I responded lamely.

"What time do you get off?" he asked me, but his eyes drifted to my mouth. When I realized he might kiss me, right there in the middle of the library, I panicked. I was suddenly hyper aware of our proximity and shrugged underneath his arm so I could take a few steps back.

"A couple more hours," I answered.

He chuckled once at my nervousness and took a couple of slow even steps back to me. His left hand came up and slowly pushed a section of my hair back behind my shoulder while allowing his fingertips to brush lightly against my neck.

"Alright," he smirked. "What time should I pick you up tomorrow?"

"I'm riding with Alice and Edward," I told him.

"Edward?" he asked. I hadn't realized I hadn't mentioned him.

"Alice's brother. He is staying with us for a week or two while he's in town," I explained.

"Hmm," was all James said in response. I couldn't tell from his reaction if he was upset or not about the information.

"You could meet up and ride with us if you wanted," I offered. While I didn't necessarily want Edward and James together, I also didn't want James to lose interest because of his presence. Because as much as I wished otherwise, Edward's presence was temporary while James seemed willing to make an effort.

"Sounds perfect," he smiled. "What time?"

"We are leaving around 1:00."

"See you then," he said.

**X**

When I walked in the door of my apartment a few hours later I was surprised to see Alice and Edward already sitting at the table with a pizza box opened in the middle.

"Hey Bella, how was work?" Alice asked as soon as I got in the door.

"Alright," I said.

"Good," she smiled. "Want some pizza?"

"Yeah, sure, just give me a minute," I told her and made my way back to my room to unload my purse and a few books I had brought home from work.

I resisted the urge to check my face in the mirror and made my way back out to the table. There was no reason in trying to make myself more appealing to the gorgeous man sitting out there. I was sure any extra effort I made would be lost on him anyway. I even made a point to avoid looking in his direction as I grabbed a piece of pizza and sat with Alice between us.

I hadn't seen him since the night at the laundry mat, I assumed because he had to stay over at work. It was extremely hard not to look at him; he just naturally pulled your sight like some sort of magnetic force. Luckily Alice's chatter about her day gave me reason to focus on her.

"So Jasper says these cookouts are a big thing, that there are a lot of people there," she turned to me.

I nodded. "Yeah, Emmett is fairly popular for them, especially at the station. There are always tons of officers and their families there. They play volleyball and horseshoes all day."

"Ooh, I love volleyball," Alice quirked. "I hope the weather is nice enough to play. We should be on the same team Bella!" I laughed at her suggestion, which made her frown.

"Sorry, Alice, but I don't play. I figured you would have known that," I told her. I knew for a fact she had seen me trip countless times.

She threw her head back in laughter. "Oh my goodness I totally didn't put those things together. Yeah, I'm pretty sure you would be a nightmare to play with," she laughed again.

I finally had to look at Edward when his voice chimed up, and as I knew would happen, I couldn't look away. Every time I saw him it was as if I had completely forgot how unbelievable perfect he was and it took me by surprise each time.

"What's so funny," he asked Alice who was still shaking in laughter.

"Oh my, Edward, Bella is just about the clumsiest person I have ever met. She walks into walls and trips over the perfectly smooth wooden floors in here. You've ever seen anything like it."

Edward looked from his sister to me catching my stare. I blushed furiously, mostly due to Alice's embarrassing although accurate description of my walking ability (or lack thereof), but also due to the fact that I knew I wouldn't be able to pull away from his eyes.

His face held a hint of a smile as he met and held my gaze. Thankfully Alice piped up with another question and pulled my focus away.

"So, James is still coming, right?"

"Yeah. He stopped by the library today. I think he is going to meet me here and ride over with us," I answered, suddenly looking everywhere expect Edward as I studied my plate.

"Oh cool," was all Alice replied before she launched into something about her annoying Elective Arts teacher who smelled like feet.

A few minutes later when I dared to look up from my lap/plate/fingernails, I noticed Edward watching me. His eyes quickly darted back to his sister.

"I'm almost certain he doesn't wash his hair, either," Alice finished as she stood with a disgusted look on her face. She carried her plate into kitchen leaving me in silence with Edward. We both avoided the other's gaze until he finally stood with his plate and followed Alice.

**X**

Later that evening Edward had stepped out saying something in passing about an errand. I was almost relieved at his departure due the thick tension that seemed to simmer between us.

Just as I was wondering how in the world Alice hadn't picked up on the weird vibes, she plopped next to me on the couch.

"So," she started then paused, waiting for me to look up from the new poetry book I had grabbed from the library.

Finally receiving my attention she continued, "What is with you? Are you uncomfortable with Edward being here?"

"No," I replied immediately. I wondered if Edward had put that idea in her head. Was that how I came off to him? She glared at me, waiting for me to expand my answer.

"He's fine, I just have a lot on my mind," I told her before turning back to my book, hoping she would drop it.

"Hmm, I guess it is just him then," she pondered out loud. I turned back to her.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, it's just that he is usually so friendly and talkative," she explained.

I tried to hide my frown. _Talkative? _He had barely spoken to me. Did he think I was such bad company that he didn't even try?

"Don't worry about it," Alice said, noticing my frustration that I obviously didn't hide well. "I bet he is just cranky from work or all those years of jet lag."

I nodded half-heartedly and went back to my book, even though I couldn't focus completely anymore. I wondered briefly if I should try more, make an effort to be friendlier to him, but shook the idea away quickly. It didn't matter what he thought of me. I would only see him a few times a year at most, so there wasn't any reason to let it concern me.

**X**

My book of collaborations from John Keats eventually regained my attention and I got lost in his lyrics. I eventually grabbed a pen and notepad to jot down notes on various poems and ideas. I didn't have any real assignments from school yet, but I knew there would be a project in a few weeks in my Creative Writing class and it never hurt to be prepared.

I had no idea no late it had gotten when the front door opened and Edward quietly walked through. He caught sight of me on the couch and smiled slightly before making his way over. I started to stretch as he approached.

"Sorry, I didn't realize how late it was. I guess you want your bed?" I said, as I got ready to stand.

"No, it's alright," he replied, motioning for me to stay. He sat down next to me, leaving a comfortable amount of space between us. "Is that Keats?" he asked, looking at my book.

"Yes," I answered.

"Are you familiar with him?"

"Not before tonight," I replied.

"He is largely unappreciated. I find his work to be rather fluid and beautiful though," he said nonchalantly.

I stared at him a bit incredulously for a moment before my thoughts flew unfiltered out of my mouth. "When do you even have time to read?" I bit my lip as soon as the words came out souding slightly harsher than I had meant.

"I have to find some way to occupy my time during travel," he said, apparently unscathed by my tone.

"Right," I said quickly before shaking my head and glancing back down at my notepad. I attempted to finish the note I had been making when his presence interrupted me but the line of thought I had been following was no longer coherent. I scanned over the paragraph I had been reading while chewing nervously on my pen. I could feel Edward's eyes burning into me from only a foot away. My instinct was to turn to him, to allow myself to drown in his penetrating stare, but I fought against it and won.

I wasn't sure what our strange glances meant or what passed between us during them, but I'm sure it did nothing to improve our odd relationship, or whatever it was we had. Surely something was there or Alice wouldn't have mentioned it.

"Is that homework?" he asked after a moment.

I refrained from looking up when I responded. "Kind of. I found this book at work today and thought I would check it out. After a while I got lost in it, then decided to take some notes, maybe for a future assignment." I shrugged half-heartedly. "I do agree with you, though, about his writing," I surprised myself when I continued. "I haven't read everything yet of course, but my favorite so far is definitely _La Belle Dame Sans Merci_."

"Ah, you are a romantic then?" he concluded.

"Well, yes, usually, but I don't really put myself in one category. I like a bit of everything. Depends on my mood more than anything."

"So you are in a romantic mood," he smirked at his own assessment.

"I... um..." I tried to reply but words failed me. Finally I choked out "I guess so," under my breath.

When I looked to him again our gaze inevitably locked, and he held my eyes with his for what seemed like forever. I found myself studying the various shades of green that swirled and mixed to make the amazing color that surrounded his irises. When he finally looked down, I immediately did the same.

"I'm sorry if I am being rude," he told me. I wasn't sure what in particular he was referring to: the odd staring, the off-handed questions, or his aloof behavior. I didn't look up at him, afraid I wouldn't be able to come up with a logical response if I did. Instead I played absently with book's dogged-eared pages.

"No, you're fine," I shrugged.

He grabbed a book off the coffee table that was part of the collection I had borrowed from the library. "Do you mind?" he asked.

I shook my head and went back to my own book, but from that point on I gave up on notes and only read, while Edward read in companionable silence next to me.

**X**

My eyes fluttered open as my body hit the bed. Edward stood above me after apparently carrying my sleeping form from the couch to my bedroom. He smiled at me before heading toward the door.

"Edward?" my voice called out, thick from sleep. With one hand on the doorknob he paused and looked back at me.

"Did you bring me back here last night too?" I asked.

"Yes," he confirmed in a whisper.

"And the medicine?"

"Yes," he repeated. Silence filled the room for a moment while I consider everything. I was slightly aggravated that I had been in his arms on two occasions and had not been conscious for either.

"Thank you," I told him.

Even in the dim light that spilt into the room from the hall I could see the crooked smile form on his face. "No problem," he said. "See you in the morning."

"Mmmhmm," I told him as I rolled on my side. I heard the door shut as I drifted back to sleep with a smile on my face.

**A/N #2: So, no James this time. Anything he would have added would have just been repetative, so we will wait for the next chapter before we hear from him again. Next up - the guys will finally met each other, so keep watch for that!**

**Now take a sec to leave me some love! I got tons of people alerting this story, so I know you're out there! **


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. **

**A/N: So my awesome-possum beta, herinfiniteeyes, totally took my original chapter and translated it into Washington-speak. Apparently I went all I midwestern on her. So major thanks to her for making this better in more ways than one.**

**Enjoy.**

On my way to the kitchen in the early morning hours I had been stopped in my tracks by Edward's sleeping form. He was sprawled out, his lanky and tall frame spilling all over the couch.

His face was peaceful and relaxed in his slumber, and he was as beautiful as ever. As much as I wanted to stand there and look at him endlessly, I forced myself to move quickly into kitchen before I felt too much like a stalker. I had promised Emmett three pies for his gathering and it would take most of the morning to prepare and bake them.

Despite my extreme effort to make the smallest amount of noise possible as to not wake Edward, I failed. He strolled into the kitchen only 20 minutes later, scrubbing his sleepy face with his hands before they raked through his bronze locks.

"I'm so sorry, I tried to be quiet," I apologized as he started to make preparations for coffee.

"It's fine. I don't normally sleep much later than this anyway."

"It's the weekend though. I should have started preparing this last night," I admonished myself.

"Honestly," he said, pouring water into the back of the automatic coffee maker, "I have given up on sleeping in, even on the weekends. My body just doesn't know how to do it anymore." He pressed a button and the appliance sprang into action.

"That would be miserable." I looked at him in pity. He shrugged as he turned his body towards mine and propped himself against the counter as he waited for his brew.

A smile stretched lazily across his face as he laid his eyes on me - and I watched in disbelief as he slowly leaned away from the counter, and started to take slow, calculated steps in my direction. My heart doubled its rate in a matter of seconds as he stopped only inches from me, eyes still trained on mine. Time lost all meaning and I couldn't be sure how much passed from the time he stopped in front of me to when he slowly started to lift his left hand.

My body felt cemented in place as an electrical current seemed to hum in the short distance that separated us. His hand finally found it's destination of the apple of my left cheek, and he rubbed it with his thumb.

"Your face," he paused, his voice an octave lower than I had ever heard it, "is covered in flour."

Still unable to move, my eyes just danced back and forth between his as I tried to slow the pace of my heart and erratic breathing. After a few strokes his thumb stilled on my cheek, but he didn't remove it and my face tingled where we were connected. I fought to not lean in his hand. I wasn't sure what was going on between us but I didn't dare push it any further.

My mind was racing, concluding that this extended moment could not just be him removing the flour, but something that had been building between us.

I nearly jumped out of my skin when my buzzer went off on the counter, and Edward's hand dropped immediately. I grabbed the timer and turned it off.

"My dough is done resting," I murmured and turned back to my pastry makings. Edward took a step back but didn't turn away, just watched as I floured my rolling pin and surface. Finally he turned and took a mug from the cabinet and poured a cup of coffee.

"Would you like some?" he asked, holding out the mug he clutched.

"Sure. I take a splash of..." I started, but Edward was already removing the creamer from the fridge and pouring a small amount in the cup. While we had shared breakfast a few times over the last week, I was still shocked to see him know what I took in my coffee. I hadn't realized he had been paying attention. All the same, I knew he took his black.

He handed me the mug, poured his own cup and walked out of the kitchen without another word.

X

I opened the oven and carefully pulled out Emmett's personal favorite, apple pie. In my frenzy to get ready I had almost let it burn. Luckily it was perfect; evenly golden brown all the way around the top. I placed it next to the coconut cream and chocolate pies that were cooling on top of wire racks. I glanced at the clock and was pleased with the fact that I had managed to get everything ready, including myself, on time.

A knock on the door pulled me from my smug satisfaction. _James_. I had completely forgotten in my mad rush around the house that he was coming. Moreover, he would be driving with all of us, including Edward... who had been practically pressed up against me only a couple of hours ago in a heated stare down.

I shook myself off and walked stoically to the door. I had no idea what Edward was thinking when the tense moment had passed between us, but I did know we had made sure to steer clear of each other since. I had allowed my busy morning to distract me from thinking any more of it, afraid to hope it meant to him what it meant to me.

I reached the door and drug it open, finding James standing there, as I knew I would. He smiled and pulled me to him, clutching me to his chest it a tight hug. Guilt burned through me as I finally returned the embrace. If Edward did want something with me, what would it do to James? He had made no secret of his infatuation with me and I knew even in this early stage of our semi-relationship he would be more than disappointed if it ended.

I pulled back and smiled at him. "Come in," I gestured with my hand.

"Thanks," he said as he stepped in and let his eyes sweep across the room. "Wow, you have a nice place."

"Yeah, well, it's all Alice. I just live here."

As if summoned, Alice appeared from the hall followed by Edward, who stopped short when he saw the company.

"Hey, James. Nice to see you again," she sang.

"You too. Your apartment is amazing. They built these just a few years ago, right?"

"Yeah. I moved in when they were new. You know, they were having trouble getting rid of last of them. I bet they still have some available. You should check it out," she suggested with a wink.

James swung his head in my direction. "Yeah. Maybe I will," he said softly as he looked at me.

Edward finished his trek into the small foyer and outstretched his arm to James, who finally looked away and to Edward.

"Hey. I'm Edward, Alice's brother," he said evenly.

James took his hand and shook it once. "James."

I looked back and forth between them for a second, feeling my mind war with itself before I finally chimed up. "Alright, we should hit the road. I need everyone to carry a pie." I ushered them all into the kitchen and handed them their respective pies after I wrapped them in plastic.

We all climbed into James' unmarked car, with Edward and Alice in the back, as it was the most spacious. I gave James vague directions to get him started in the right direction and then we all sat in the strange silence of the car. For a moment I thought something may be wrong with Alice, it was unlike her to allow such a lull in conversation, but I glanced back to see her texting away on her phone, undoubtedly with Jasper.

James finally broke the silence. "So, Edward, what do you do?"

"I work for Advanced Kinetics," Edward replied. "I travel to companies building the latest in traveling technology and offer to buy their designs or give them grants in order to preserve first rights to any products they produce."

"You sound like a busy man," James deduced.

"I am," Edward agreed.

"Bella tells me you're only in Seattle for a short time."

"Yes. I'm actually leaving Wednesday," Edward said.

I felt myself deflate.

How had I let it all slip my mind? Only minutes ago I was ready to drop everything in hopes that Edward might be interested in me, apparently letting it completely slip my mind that he wasn't staying. I wanted to bang my head against the dashboard at my absentmindedness. That was a major detail to overlook. Sadly, all it had taken to make me forget was one heated moment with Edward.

I forced myself to square my shoulders and think of matters for what they were.

Edward. Was. Not. An. Option.

Even more, James didn't deserve second place. _Edward_ would leave and _James_ would stay. I vowed to forget Edward and avoid him the few short remaining days he would be here. I tried to ignore the slight prick in my chest at the thought, because I knew it was minor compared to the ache it would endure were I to let anything more develop before he left.

_I was protecting myself_, I reasoned.

"Where are you off to next?" James continued his interrogation, unaware of my internal battle.

"London."

London? Across an entire ocean? I almost sank in my seat - and just like that I had forgotten my resolution of only seconds earlier. My skull was apparently thicker than I had ever imagined. I quickly admonished myself and instead noticed the scenery outside. We were closing in on Emmett's block and I interrupted James' conversation to finish giving him directions.

James POV

I waited for Bella's directions even though I already knew where Emmett lived. As we rounded into the driveway I noticed the large crowd that had already gathered. I tried not to let the amount of people bother me, reasoning that most everyone here would be couples and I would not have to worry about vying for Bella's attention.

With all but one exception.

Edward was stiff as he responded to my questions in the car, and I knew that he was regretting his decision to accompany us today. He was obviously bothered by the fact that Bella was with me. Had chosen me. I bit back the grin but allowed myself a small strut of confidence as I followed Bella into her brother's house.

Riding in the vehicle with the pies had been almost as torturous as riding with Edward. They smelled so f delicious and I couldn't wait to taste one and tell my girl so. We laid them out on the kitchen table as Bella went straight to the leggy blonde I knew to be her sister-in-law and offer her assistance.

"God, no, I don't want anything to eat. Are you kidding me?" she replied to Bella. "I just got done getting rid of everything that was already in there. I'm never eating again."

Bella smiled sweetly at her and patted her hand. "Well if I can help you do anything just let me know. I know how distracted Em can get at these things."

"Thanks, Bella," Rosalie softened.

X

After everyone ate they started dividing into teams for volleyball.

"Come on babe, let's go play," I stood and offered my hand to Bella.

"Oh no, that's alright," she said, laughing slightly. "I'll keep score or something."

"Don't be ridiculous," I scoffed. "Come on."

"Maybe later," she said, and I figured maybe she wanted to digest her food, so I dropped it and jogged to one side of the net. I immediately noticed Edward on the other side and smirked. He had made himself scarce since we had arrived, much to my satisfaction. Now I would have the chance to humiliate him in front of everyone.

"Volley for serve," Alice's boyfriend Jasper called out before pumping the ball into the air and sending it over the net. A blonde kid on Edward's team returned it in one fierce smack and it landed on our side just inside the boundary line.

"Our serve," the kid said smugly. It seemed I had two people to put in their place.

Emmet, on other side of the net, served first and a good volley ensued afterward. The two teams made mostly out of male police officers were bound to be a bit athletic and competitive.

"James," I heard Jasper call out as he tapped the ball high into the air just above the net, setting me up for a spike. Determined, I jumped and smacked the ball in front of the blonde kid's feet and watched as he tried to dive in a poor attempt to return it. All he came up with was a dirty shirt. He stood and grudgingly tossed the ball to side for our turn to serve.

"This one's for you, Eddie," Alice taunted, and I watched in shock as she served and launched the ball powerfully over the net to her brother. Edward was prepared for her serve although the rest of us weren't. He returned it and I watched as it came in my direction.

_This one's for you too, Eddie_, I thought as I hit it right back in his direction with twice as much force as he had used. His face hardened as he saw the ball come back to him and he bumped it back in my direction again. Instead of returning it right away, I bumped it up slightly and called out for Jasper, who did as I knew he would: he pumped it above the net again, and then I spiked it, aiming for and hitting the dirt just to the side of Edward and scoring the point.

The game went on in such a manner until it ended; our team won by three points.

"Rematch in 5 minutes," Emmett promised as he ran over to get a drink. I walked up to Bella and sat next to her.

"Nice game," Bella told me as I walked up to her and sat down.

"Thanks. Ready to play?" I asked.

"No, I don't think so," she said.

"Bella, you have to play. It will be fun," I coaxed her.

"I'm not really the athletic type," she told me.

"Pfft. Come on," I stood up and dragged her with me to the court where a couple of people were playing around and batting the ball back and forth. I placed her toward the middle of the field next to me.

"Now, all you have to do is watch the ball. If it comes to you, hit it. I'll stand right next to you the whole time and help you."

"James-" she began to argue, but I stopped her with a finger over her mouth.

"Just try it," I told her. I knew she would like it if she only tried.

She hung her head in defeat as the others started making their way back out. I was slightly shaken by Emmett's loud, boisterous laugh as he approached.

"You're playing?" he looked at Bella.

"Yes," I answered for her and pulled her into my side.

"Alright," he said looking doubtful.

"Losers serve," I told him.

He laughed as he waited for everyone else to get into their position before he served. Someone behind me hit it back over and straight to the annoying blonde kid. I saw him glance at me as he jumped and hit the ball forcefully right into Bella's leg.

Bella folded.

"You little son of a bitch!" I yelled as ducked under the net with balled fists wound back. Immediately I felt arms grab me from behind and I jerked violently in an effort to get free, but more than one person was hold me back.

"You little shit. He was aiming for me and hit my girl," I yelled as I writhed against the barriers. Emmett came in front of me and put one hand on my chest. If my hands had been free I would have snapped his arm in two.

"James, dude, you need to calm down. He didn't hurt Bella on purpose. Now go check on her."

My head whipped around to where Bella was sitting on the grass, Alice was at her side with..._ Edward_. What the hell? The arms around me tightened for a moment as I started to thrash again but dropped once they realized I was no longer interested in the little twerp, although I wasn't sure of that fact as I headed in Bella's direction. The ignorant kid better hope he never traveled any dark alleys late at night.

Bella didn't seem too upset as she and the other two examined her knee.

"I think it might be a bit swollen," Alice guessed as she looked at it. Bella shrugged and put her weight on her right leg as she attempted to stand. I quickly closed the remaining distance and put an arm under her to support her left side.

"I'll take her back and sit with her. You guys should continue the game," I instructed as I led her off the court. She limped only slightly until we reached the seats.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have made you play," I told her as she winced getting into her seat. _I also should have killed that prick, _I added to myself.

"Oh, don't worry about it," she said. "I have been accident prone my entire life. I'm used to these small injuries."

I took the seat next to her and rubbed her hand before leaving my own placed on top of it. She glanced over at me.

"You really don't have to sit here with me. You'll miss all the fun."

"Nah. I'd rather be here anyway," I told her.

"You shouldn't be too hard on Mike," she said a moment later. "Emmett and I have known him for a while. He didn't do this on purpose."

"I know," I said, even though I didn't. I still wanted to make a mess of his face. "I just saw him look right at me when he hit that ball into your leg and I just lost it for a minute. I shouldn't have gotten so angry."

She smiled slightly and looked back to the game.

We watched them volley back and forth for a while and my mind drifted to the idiot boy, Mike, and the even more annoying Edward. My search on him had given me nothing productive to use against him, even though I was still digging. I had only one angle and as I looked over at Bella observing the game I knew it was as good of a time as any.

I waited purposely until Edward hit the ball, and then said, "Good hit." Bella nodded. Feigning my interest in the game, I didn't look at her as I started to muse out loud. "I bet he is really enjoying today. I can't imagine he gets very much company."

Bella turned to me, her forehead slightly wrinkled. "You know," I shrugged, "he travels so much. Although, I am sure he doesn't get too lonely at night."

I waited and watched her eyes as she digested the meaning of my statement. They widened in understanding.

"That type of work just lends itself to that kind of lifestyle," I suggested. "Personally, I wouldn't like anything so... flimsy. I am more of a... one woman kind of guy."

She looked at me as she smiled shyly. _That's my girl._

"But," I continued, reaching out to put my arm behind her chair, "to each his own."

She nodded once more before turning back to the game.

Bella POV

Edward and Alice hopped quietly out of the car as James came to a stop in front of my apartment complex. Today had been one of the longest days of my life. I couldn't believe I started the morning only inches from Edward's face as I was now feeling so far away from him. We hadn't breathed a word to one another since, even when he had ran to my side after the volleyball incident. He just sat beside me quietly assessing my leg.

Not to mention James had given me plenty to consider. Had I really let myself get so wrapped up in a man that was barely in one place for more than 48 hours at a time? Who probably never knew a woman more than that length of a time period? The sad answer was I had, and that I had done it with the knowledge of all these facts.

I looked over at James and tried to force myself to feel a fraction for him of what I felt with Edward. I wanted to want James. He was more than loyal; he proved that today even if he had been a bit extreme. I reasoned that things would be easier after Edward left, that the connection between us would only grow with Edward's absence.

James' grey eyes flickered to mine and I watched as he started to lean into me. I froze as I realized his intent. My first reaction was to pull away and my body almost did so of its own accord, but I steeled myself. I knew that this step was coming, that it was necessary to get past the hurdle that Edward presented, even though I still felt the urge to put it off as long as possible.

Just as my mind was weakening and I almost leaned into him, the com in his car sounded with two loud beeps. A woman's voice came on the speaker.

"Any officers in the UW area please respond."

I watched as he shot daggers at the com and I laughed lightly. "I guess I better go." I reached for the door handle.

"I'll call you later," I told him as I left the car. I heard him answer the com, calling in his badge number and turning out of the parking lot toward the school.

Back in the apartment I felt almost afraid to see Edward, afraid that he would see what felt like betrayal on my face and be hurt or angry, or even worse that he would see it and not care.

I noticed him in the kitchen washing my pie pans and placing them in the dishwasher. Despite my promise to avoid him for my own good, I couldn't help myself as I walked up to him started helping. We worked together with ease in the silence as we cleaned up my mess from the morning. I was wiping down the counter while he added detergent and started the dishwasher before he finally spoke up.

"How is your knee?" he asked.

"Better."

"That's good." He stood there in silence for a moment while I continued to wipe the counter, even though it was already clean.

"What about James? Is he alright?"

"What do you mean?" I asked, stopping my scrubbing and looking up at him.

"Well, he just seemed a little... I don't know," he stopped himself.

"What?" I pushed him.

"It's not really my place," he said looking away.

"Just spit it out, Edward," I huffed.

"I just worry... about his temper," he said finally. "He really lost it there for a second."

I brushed it off. "It was a knee-jerk reaction. He said Mike looked at him right before he hit the ball and he let his temper get the best of him. Besides, he wouldn't be the first cop with a hot head."

Edward nodded slightly in agreement. "Yeah. Yeah, of course."

Neither of us said anything after that, so finally I rinsed the washrag I had been using and laid it on the sink.

"Good night, Edward," I said as I passed him and made my way to my room. I was eager to lie down and put an end to the topsy-turvy day.

"Good night," he whispered over his shoulder.

**A/N #2: I hope the crazy POV change in the middle of the chapter didn't throw you guys, but I felt like we would miss so much in Bella's POV at the cook out as she is still clueless. Bella really didn't see James' outburst as that big of a deal but really it was a slip on his part. And I am pretty sure Bella missed the "my girl" comment he made, especially since Edward was near ;)**

**Sorry if the volleyball talk was hard to understand or uber boring or both, but I needed a way to have E & J have a testosterone match in a way that wouldn't be super apparent to everyone else. I love volleyball so it was the easiest way for me.**

**FINALLY**** - in an attempt to draw all my lurking readers out, I am offering a teaser of the next chapter to anyone who reviews. It may or may not be all betaed and pretty, but I'll make it good. Hope to hear from you all!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. *sigh***

**A/N: I don't even know how much of this chapter I can even take credit for. My beta (herinfiniteeyes) gave me tons of ideas to run with and she has been amazing. If you need some relief from all the sexual tension goin' on in here, go check out her stories. (I am lovin' All Work and No Play, myself) Always makes me feel better anyway. :D**

I sat mindlessly in the living room chair, my legs slung over one arm and my head leaning back on the other. I was alone and flipping through channels on the television, but not really paying too much attention to anything on. I wasn't big on TV to begin with, and any programs that ran during Sunday morning were not worth watching anyway.

I had shamelessly slept in after the long and weird day before, not crawling out of bed until shortly before 11:00 a.m. When I heard both showers running I plopped down into the chair I was in now. I had big plans to do nothing all day.

That was when I heard someone knocking on the front door. I sighed in annoyance at whoever was ruining my relaxation by making me get up, and continued to huff the entire distance to the door.

I jerked it open, unapologetic for the look of frustration I was sure to be wearing, when I realized the perpetrator was Jasper.

"What are you doing here?" I asked as I stepped to the side to let him in.

"Nice to see you too, sis," he smiled as he strutted past me. Walking into the living room he sat down on the couch. "What in the world are you watching?"

I glanced at the TV. I had stopped on some sort of health or medical channel and we were watching a grotesque operation on someone's inwards.

"You didn't answer my question," I said, ignoring the TV.

"Meeting the parents today," he said, his eyes still trained on the television. His face was somewhere between complete disgust and utter fascination. Ugh. Guys.

"I didn't know you were meeting them already," I said as I sat back down in my chair. "You must be pretty serious about Alice."

He finally ripped his eyes off the medical procedure to look at me seriously. "Of course."

Wow. Not only was I shocked by his bluntness, but also his no-nonsense attitude about the whole thing. Jasper was a very laid-back guy who found the humor in everything. I couldn't remember a time seeing him so serious.

However, as quick as his wall of seriousness had gone up it came back down, and he smiled his goofy smile before turning back to his macabre interest. "Besides, I'll have you there as a buffer. I can always count on you to do something more embarrassing than me." He laughed to himself.

"I'm not going anywhere," I informed him as I settled into my chair the way I had been before he had interrupted my day of Zen.

"Alice said you were coming," he replied, stating it as if it was the absolute truth due to his source.

"She didn't mention it to me. I worked hard yesterday and I go back to school and work tomorrow. Today is my day off."

Jasper snickered under his breath in response and I mentally groaned. He snickered because he knew there was no arguing with Alice. I knew it too, but I was hoping that since she had forgotten to tell me I would be allowed a pass.

I really wouldn't mind meeting the Cullens, but I also wanted to stick to my plan of keeping my distance from Edward. I couldn't help but want to be around him and that was all the more reason not to be.

I closed my eyes to relieve them from the gore of medical discoveries and considered the best strategy to win the argument that would surely ensue with Alice. I hadn't firmed up anything by the time she bounded into the room and I whimpered to myself in early capitulation.

"Bella?" I heard her ask in confusion. "Why aren't you ready?"

I didn't open my eyes. "You never told me anything about today. I'm not going."

"I told you about it Thursday night!" she said accusingly.

Thursday night? I wracked my brain for all of five seconds before it hit me. "When we were drinking? That does _not_ count."

When she didn't respond for a moment I peeked out with one eye. She was standing between myself and the television with her arms crossed in front of her.

"I haven't even had a chance to shower yet," I added to my defense.

Alice stalked past me and I heard her only seconds later banging on the bathroom door in the hall behind me. "Get out, Edward!"

I heard the door open and I was suddenly glad that everything was happening out of my line of sight because I would have folded within seconds of seeing him. However, my mind conjured images of what he might look like - crisp and fresh with his slightly damp hair in every direction - to make up for not seeing it first hand before I was able to halt the action.

"All yours, Bella," Alice sang.

I closed my eyes again. "Alice, today is my only day to do nothing. I want to stay here."

"Isabella, you are coming with me. Now get your rear-end in the shower! We're leaving in an hour."

Jasper snickered again from the couch. I reached for the pillow behind me and launched it at him, but when my eyes landed on my target I realized I had hit Edward instead. He had evidently made his way silently to the seat next to Jasper.

He looked at me with wide, surprised eyes. Jasper laughed out loud.

"Sorry," I said under my breath as I stood up. "That was for him," I explained and playfully smacked the back of Jasper's head as I passed him.

"Hey!" I heard Jasper whine as I left the room.

I pouted at Alice as I passed her in the hall on my way to get ready for another day out.

Edward and Alice's parents lived in Gig Harbor, a community not far from Tacoma. We took Alice's Porsche because she insisted, and I found myself in the cramped backseat next to Edward's lanky frame. If either of us had relaxed our bodies in the slightest we would have been touching, but we both stayed rigid in order to prevent it as we looked out our respective windows.

When we finally reached the Narrows Bridge that would take us the remaining distance I was close to combustion. The tension pooling between Edward and I was permanently damaging my nerves while Alice prattled on about some 'huge squid that marine biologists found living under this bridge among the debris of Gallopin' Gertie' from the front seat.

The ride had taken over an hour due to traffic from some fair going on that weekend in a smaller town nearby. As we finally pulled into a neighborhood I watched in amazement as the houses outside my window kept getting larger and larger the deeper we got into the area. I knew that Alice came from money but I had never considered how much.

She whipped her little yellow car into a driveway at the end of a cul-de-sac. I was so excited to get out and stretch that I almost missed the house we had arrived at. _Almost_. It was essentially a three-story castle and all I could manage to do was stand and stare in awe. The most magnificent feature was the wide windows covering a good percentage of the house. When I glanced over at Jasper he was in a similar stance to my own with his mouth ajar.

"Come on you two," Alice waved us up the sidewalk.

We followed Edward and Alice up and into the entryway of the gigantic house. The inside was as immaculate as the out; everything was white on white, from the furniture to the walls to the beautiful fresh cut white lilies that sat on every available table surface.

"Mom, Dad, we're here," Alice called into the seemingly empty house. Noise came from what looked to be a dining room as a man and woman came around the corner.

"Oh! Hi kids," their mother cooed as she laid eyes on them. She was a beautiful lady with caramel hair laying in soft, perfect curls down her back. She grabbed Edward in a forceful hug, clutching him to her.

"How have you been?" she asked befored releasing him slightly to look him over.

"Fine," he said as he smiled at her.

"Glad to hear it, hon," she said, then grabbed her daughter up next.

Their father, who mirrored Edward in almost every way excluding his blonde hair, stepped up to his son and pulled him into a hug of his own.

"It's good to see you," he told him.

"You too," Edward replied. His father then patted him on his shoulder before turning to his daughter and scooping her up in a hug.

Jasper and I watched the happy reunion from a distance but soon four pairs of eyes landed on us; all of them green.

"And who do we have here?" their mother asked with delight.

"Mom, Dad, this is Jasper," Alice said as she walked to his side and linked her arm in his.

"Nice to meet you Mrs. Cullen," Jasper said as he extended his hand to her.

"Please, call me Esme," she told him as she took his hand.

He nodded politely then turned to their father who took his hand next.

"Hello, Jasper. I'm Carlisle."

"Oh, Edward! Who is this?" Esme asked excitedly as she reached me.

I realized a moment late that she thought I had come as Edward's date and I felt my face burn. I opened my mouth to correct her but nothing came out. I could see Edward standing speechless in my peripheral vision.

"Mom, this is my new roommate," Alice jumped in.

I held out my hand. "Bella Swan."

She took it. "Oh, excuse me. It's nice to meet you, Bella."

I turned and shook Carlisle's hand as well.

"Well kids, we were just having some tea in the other room. Why don't you join us?"

We all sat in a comfortable breakfast nook area drinking warm honey tea for most of the afternoon. Alice explained how she had met me and Jasper before going into her first week back to school.

Then even I listened intently as Edward recapped the exciting new technologies he was investigating and the places he had seen during his most recent travels. I was seated next to him and I caught myself leaning in to listen to him talk. I was too afraid to look up to check and see if anyone else had noticed as I straightened.

Carlisle and Esme soon excused themselves to start dinner. Edward disappeared to somewhere in the large house and Alice took Jasper and I on a tour.

We stopped in Alice's old bedroom and the three of us lounged on her bed as we listened to music and chatted easily. My mind would drift back to where Edward had gone every few minutes, almost as if in timed intervals. All in all, however, I was pleased with my performance to that point. I had successfully kept my distance from him, even in the confining car, and had hardly spoken to him.

When Jasper and Alice relaxed on her bed a little too snug, I excused myself. Watching them as a couple made me want my own person to lean in to and the one that came to my mind immediately was not the one it should have been. I decided to freshen up and then see if I could assist Carlisle and Esme in the kitchen. I was very interested to see the possibilities that a kitchen in this house could hold.

I walked down to the bottom floor before I remembered Alice had not gone over it, stating it only had 'studies and stuff.' Most of the doors were open so I made my way down the hall and peeked cautiously into each one. I breathed out in relief when I found the right room but stopped in my tracks when I heard music coming from the next door down.

I crept slowly to the doorway and leaned my head around carefully to peek through the small opening. What I saw almost knocked me to my knees. Edward was sitting at a piano, his long, slender fingers flying effortlessly across the keys. I didn't recognize the tune, but to call it beautiful would be an understatement.

I didn't want to interrupt, but I wasn't sure if he would keep playing if I just entered the room to listen. Instead I sat down on the floor next to the door, leaned against the wall and listened to him. I closed my eyes and let my head rest on the wall behind it, completely mesmerized by the melody that floated out of the room.

I listened as it changed every so often, sometimes fast and furious while other times soft and sensual, making me want to melt into the floor. I had lost all sense of place and time when I heard Alice.

"Bella?" she asked loudly. My eyes popped open in surprise and I heard Edward's hands stumble and halt in the room behind me.

"What in the world are you doing in the hall?" Alice continued, standing at the other end of the hallway looking at me at me curiously.

"I was looking for the bathroom," I said under my breath as I stood up.

"Then why were you on the floor?" She was relentless.

"I was resting," I huffed back at her.

"Well, come on, dinner is ready," she said before turning on her heel and walking away. I hung my head as I followed her, knowing dinner would be unbearable now that Edward knew of my intrusion.

I watched as everyone filled their seats around the table, realizing as the couples sat together that I would be sitting next to Edward again. I tried to hide my scarlet face as I sat and saw him enter from the hall I had just come from.

"There you are, Edward," Alice said as he took his seat next to me. "Where did you go off to?"

"I was just playing dad's old piano a bit," he said.

Alice's eyes flickered to me as she realized what room I had been perched outside of.

"Oh," she said before moving her eyes away.

During dinner, Carlisle and Esme turned their interests to me as they asked question and after question.

"So what do you think of Seattle?" Esme asked before taking a sip of her wine.

"I like it a lot. I am not very familiar with it yet, though."

"Oh, I'm sure that will change after four years of college. Are you homesick yet?"

"Actually, no. There has been so much going on that I've hardly had time to think about Forks. Up until a few weeks ago I had hardly been away from home at all. I like the change."

She nodded sweetly in understanding and then I breathed an audible sigh of relief when her attention turned to Jasper. I didn't mind talking to Esme or Carlisle, but I could barely concentrate on my answers as Edward looked at me to await each response.

As Jasper answered Esme's question, I gave in a little and snuck a sideways glance at Edward from under my eyelashes, only to see him staring back at me. He didn't turn away, and even though I wanted to I couldn't. My entire day's progress was lost as I finally allowed myself to drown in the sea of green. I just hoped no one else at the table was witnessing our strange connection.

Carlisle was the one to break our trance as he addressed everyone. "You kids should stop by the fair in Puyallup on your way back. Your mother and I went yesterday evening. It was very nice. The sky lift is spectacular, especially at night," Carlisle said as he glanced out of the dining room window at the waning light.

"That sounds exciting!" Alice cheered from her seat.

X

Not thirty minutes later we had said our farewells and left, making our way to the Puyallup Fair. Edward and I sat more relaxed next to each other, although still careful not to touch. Alice parked the car and we all filed out, easily ignoring the misting rain that fell.

We wound our way through the crowd, which was quite impressive for such a small town. The fair was classic in its set-up: corn dog and cotton candy stands thrown in among small rides and game booths. I was having trouble weaving in and out of the crowd and booths, all the while trying to keep up with my friends when I felt Edward grab my hand and begin to tug me along. I wanted to look up at him, to see his expression, but I didn't dare. I needed my eyes to work with me in order to avoiding falling on my face in front of him. I convinced myself that this contact didn't count, that he was being a friend by helping me through the numerous bodies and keeping me from tripping. The heat that ran up my arm from the where our skin met knew otherwise.

"Hey, look at that," Edward said, pointing to a basketball booth before dragging me in its direction. "I used to play in high school."

Of course he did. He was also rich, smart, looked good enough to eat, all on top of his ability to fly a plane _and_ play the piano brilliantly. Was there anything he couldn't do? Could there be any more reasons I didn't deserve him?

He released my hand to reach for his wallet and my palm felt cold and empty. I rubbed it against my other hand in an attempt to make it feel normal again.

A young game attendant handed a basketball to Edward, who dribbled once before tossing it into the air. It swished through the net easily, not even touching the rim.

"Nice. Which prize would you like?" the gangly teen asked. The prizes varied from large stuffed animals to framed pictures to goldfishes swimming in small bags.

"Give me a fish," Edward said. I couldn't help it, I laughed.

"What?" he asked as he accepted his prize.

"What are you going to do with a fish?"

"I don't know," he replied, studying the bag. "Guess I'll need someone to take care of it for me." His eyes moved from the bag to look at me imploringly.

"Hmm," I pretended to consider it thoughtfully. "What does a job like that pay?" I asked, not able to keep the teasing smile from my face.

He thought about it briefly. "I'll bring you back a nice gift from London," he coaxed.

I shook my head. "No, no, I was just giving you a hard time. I'll keep it. Don't bring me anything."

"Why not?"

"Just, don't. I don't like people spending money on me."

His eyes narrowed on me questioningly, but he let it drop. It was then that I looked around and noticed that we were alone.

"Where did Alice and Jasper go?"

Edward shrugged in response as he led the way toward a food stand. "Do you like funnel cakes?" he asked over his shoulder.

"Of course," I said, wondering who wouldn't.

"Wait here," he instructed as we passed a picnic table and handed me his new pet. I sat down and propped the bag with the fish on the table. He appeared a couple of minutes later with one large funnel cake.

"I hope you don't mind, but they seemed so big that I thought we'd share," he suggested.

"I don't mind," I told him, all the while wondering what was going on between us. It was beginning to feel very much like a date. Even worse, I was encouraging it.

"So," I said, stuffing pieces of the cake in mouth and dropping powdered sugar all over me in the process, "what is your fish's name?"

"Hmmm," he narrowed his eyes at the fish. "Maybe, Puyallup?"

"Makes sense," I said. I watched as he gracefully ate a piece of our dessert without issue. Figures.

"Want to ride the lift next?" he asked.

I glanced up at the ride he mentioned which was carrying patrons across the fair grounds. "I guess so."

Minutes later we found ourselves in line for the Sky Ride. Couples held hands in front of us waiting for their turn and I fought the frown that tried to bubble up. I wanted so badly for this to be a date, because that would mean that Edward lived in Seattle and would be interested in me. At times I would swear he was interested, but probably knew he couldn't offer me any kind of relationship with his demanding job.

I was so wrapped up in my internal debate over Edward that I didn't notice I was nervous until we were next in line. I couldn't tell if it was the height or the idea of being in the enclosed car with Edward, but I suddenly rethought my decision to ride.

"Are you sure you want to ride this? I mean, we can just go wait for Alice and Jasper by the car," I offered hopefully.

"Are you kidding? We have to go on this," he smiled, looking almost like Alice in his excitement. How could I turn that down? I watched as the car we would be riding in approached.

Edward stepped up and in, then held out his hand for me. I took it, trying my best to ignore the tingle that passed between us again as he helped me in. Once inside, the door closed and latched, and the ride took off.

I sat down and carefully leaned over and looked out one of the smudgy windows at the view below - and felt myself lose my bearings. I had never been so high up before. Panic seared through me as the small space spun around me and I felt all the air leave my lungs.

I quickly sat back in my seat and planted my hands on either side of me, then leaned my head back and closed my eyes.

"Are you alright?" I heard Edward ask from somewhere close by.

"I don't know," I tried to keep the whine out of my voice.

"Are you afraid of heights, Bella?" I could hear the smile in his voice. What the hell was so funny about this? Was it not enough I had to experience this in front of him?

"Apparently," I answered as fiercely as I could given the fact I was acting as a second skin to my seat.

Edward was silent after that and I focused on taking slow, deep breaths, trying to forget where I was and calm my over active mind. I wanted to jerk in surprise when I felt Edward's hand lay on top of mine, but I didn't dare move an inch.

"Bella," he whispered, and I could feel his breath on my neck. "You're fine. Don't think about the height," his nose grazed my earlobe and my eyes fluttered, torn between opening to see him so close and keeping everything else I would see away. "Just look at me," he requested.

I debated internally for a moment as I weighed the options. I was teetering on the edge of a full-fledged panic attack and hoped that maybe my body's weird ability to get lost in him would be enough of a distraction.

I slowly lifted my lids, trying to find his eyes before I let them open completely. I quickly found the green that I had been fighting so hard to avoid up to that point. I relaxed, not even fazed by how close he was, just glad that it seemed to be working. My breathing gradually slowed to only slightly faster than normal.

He didn't speak again, just waited patiently for me to gain my control while his eyes burned holes into mine with his hand still over the one I clutched the seat with. We sat there like that the entire ride, eyes locked and our faces less than a foot apart. Something shifted then, and I could almost feel my invisible wall crack and crumble away under an unnatural force. The air and atmosphere around us became palpable and almost suffocating, but neither of us fought it.

Just as it was about to swallow us whole, our faces seeming even closer, the car jerked to a stop. Even with the violent halt my eyes never left his until the attendant appeared in the open door and cleared his throat. Edward's lips pulled up into a smile as he stood. I stood and followed him, glad he was leading us back to the car because I was somewhere else entirely. I felt like I was floating.

I suddenly realized I was in the car and swiftly riding back to our apartment. I could hear voices but they were faded and I didn't attempt to decipher them. I was practically leaning into Edward in the small backseat now as I let my eyes close. His scent swirled around me along with perfect memories of his eyes and I smiled. I couldn't find it in me to worry about a single thing as I fell into oblivion.

**So, no James again, but he is coming back with a vengence in the next one. Good news for those of you diggin Creeptastic James. I sometimes scare myself writing some of the stuff he does ;)**

**Thanks to my beta for all the information about the Puyallup Fair and Narrows Bridge. **

*****There is a new set of awards getting ready to start up called The Indie TwiFic Awards. Starting Tuesday, June 16 you can go nominate really good stories that you love but just aren't getting the recognition they deserve. Stories eligible have to have less than 30 reviews per chapter or 1000 reviews per completed story. Make sure to go nominate your favorites and give some credit to the lesser known stories that deserve it (even if you don't think this is one of them). Link is in my profile.***  
**

**Finally, since so many of you came out to review when I offered the teaser last time, I'm totally doing it again, so tell me what ya think!**

***Off to find somthing for my lovely reviewers who I adore...***


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. **

**A/N: Thanks for all the kind reviews you all have been leaving, I like hearing what you like, even those of you who totally dig creepy James - you know who you are. And you're in luck, because chappy is a little heavy on the CJ. ;)**

**Thanks as well to Herinfiniteeyes for betaing. She makes me so much better. 3  
**

Never had I wanted to skip school as badly as I did when I peeled my lids back and the prior day's events flashed through my mind on a repeat reel.

Edward's green eyes inches from mine. Edward's hot breath drifting across my skin. Edward's hand on top of mine. Edward leaning right back into me on the drive home. Edward carrying me up to the apartment and into my room, even though he knew I had woken up. Edward smoothing my hair away from my face before he mouthed "good night" and left my room.

_Edward_.

I literally smacked my head. Now I had done it. I quit fighting him, even though I knew he would leave in two days and that his next arrival date was "to be announced." I smacked my head again.

I sat up in my bed reluctantly. What was my next move now? I couldn't continue the original plan; last night had destroyed it completely. I also knew I couldn't continue with both James and Edward the way I had been.

A knock on the door pulled me from my thoughts. I knew it would be Edward because Alice didn't knock. I tried to make my hair lay down for a minute before I gave up. "Come in," I said deflated.

Edward opened my door and I watched him fight a smile as he took in my appearance. I rolled my eyes.

"Like you can talk. Have you seen your hair?"

He ran a hand through the bronze mess unconsciously before grinning and shrugging. His other hand was holding his fish, which was now in a bowl, complete with a rock floor and a lonely plastic tree planted therein. He saw me notice it.

"Thought I would move in Puyallup this morning before I went to work," he said sheepishly.

I nodded to the desk and watched him carefully walk to it and place the fish there. Then he stood awkwardly for a moment, his eyes lost somewhere on my comforter.

"Well," he looked at me and then away again. "Have a good day at school." I watched with slight amusement as he stood another few seconds then turned suddenly and jetted out of the room. At least I wasn't the only one flustered. Our whole dynamic had changed and he knew it too.

Alice was uncharacteristically quiet during breakfast and most of the ride to school. I sat next to her quietly, trying to keep back the question bubbling on the tip of my tongue. I was terrified that she had noticed too many things: me sitting outside of the music room, Edward and I taking off on our own the night before, or my obvious hazed state of mind when we returned to the car.

All I knew was that I needed out of the car. I couldn't handle tension with another Cullen.

"Bella," she said, almost making me jump as she broke the silence. "What is going on with you and Edward?"

My stomach flipped. Of course she noticed. You would had to have been blind not to.

"I don't know," I told her honestly. "I really don't know."

She watched the road carefully for a moment. "Do you like him?" she pushed.

Blood rushed to my face. So apparently I was as clear as glass.

"Um, I...," I started but then stopped. What was the appropriate response here? If I admitted it to her, it would very likely get back to Edward. Although I assumed he knew, hearing your theories confirmed was another thing.

I was also worried how Alice would feel about the situation. What if she was mad or wanted me to stay away from him, or even move out? I bit my lip and looked at her.

"You do, don't you?" she said as she studied my face. I let my silence confirm her statement. Then, slowly, a smile stretched across her face. "I knew it!"

I blew out a large breath of relief. At least she wasn't upset.

"Man, Jasper was so wrong. I told him last night you were into Edward but he said you were into James," she giggled in triumph before her face turned grave. "What are you going to do about James?"

My shoulders felt lighter, having someone to discuss the situation with. "I don't know what to do about any of it. I like James; he is such a nice guy, but I can't seem to help myself around Edward. There's sort of a... pull." I said then watched her face carefully. She was still smiling so I continued. "But Edward travels so much, and I don't even know if he likes me at all."

At this her smile fell, and I knew why. It was because I was right. Edward was not able to have a relationship with anyone and I assumed that was how he preferred it. I sighed, defeated.

James POV

As my fist landed on the jaw of some poor fool that had crossed my path on a most unfortunate night, I heard the sickly crunch of his mandible as it snapped. His head hung slack then, and I unclenched my fist that had been holding him by his shirt and watched him slump to the ground, unconscious.

The moron had bumped into me at the bar where I had decided to go to drown my sorrows, and then topped it off with a smart-ass comment. Granted he needed a lesson in manners, but he couldn't have known who he was getting involved with.

I had spent the entire day of Sunday working on a case I couldn't have given a shit about. I had promised myself that I would not call Bella that day, deciding it was for the best after my slip at her brother's house. There was nothing I would have loved more than to beat that volleyball kid into a pulp, but I never should have lost my temper in front of her or her family.

The best course of action would be to give her some space; to come on too strong so soon after that kind of outburst would have been foolish. I would have settled for spending the day around her building, but I had not counted on being called into work.

When I finally made it back to her building I noticed Alice's little sporty car gone. I sat in my own car and waited, I knew that if I had a chance at seeing her at that late hour it would only be if she happened to be out with Alice.

When Alice pulled up twenty minutes later with not only Bella, but Bella limp in Edward's arms, I was sure I would suffer a coronary at the ripe age of 25. I forced myself to stay in the car all the while longing to disembowel Edward.

Instead, I took Edward's pound of flesh from someone else. I left the prick to lay in the filth behind the bar as I started the walk back to my apartment.

I decided that I needed to make things official with Bella. Ask her to go on a date, then to be exclusive. This, along with Edward's impending departure, would settle things and I could finally have her the way I was meant to.

I watched impatiently as Bella stood in front of the campus' library and checked the time on her phone again before looking around for who I assumed to be Alice. I was torn between wanting to harm Alice for stranding her and wanting to hug her for the opportunity to play Bella's hero.

I called Bella's phone.

"Alice?" she said, obviously not checking her caller ID.

"No," I said, feigning confusion, "It's James."

"Oh, hey. Sorry. I can't find Alice and I'm stuck at school. I rode with her this morning and she was supposed to pick me up and now I can't find her."

"Do you need a ride? I'm not far from you," I told her.

"Um, yeah, I guess. I'm just worried about Alice. Something must have happened."

"When I pick you up we can call the station and check for any news on her," I offered, feeling myself own up to the 'knight in shining armor' role.

"Really? Are you sure you don't mind?"

"Of course not. Now sit tight, I'll be there in a couple of minutes." I smiled to myself as I hung up. This day was going so much better than I had planned. I couldn't come out of the situation without looking like the good guy. I would find Alice and put Bella's mind to rest, or I would be there every minute as "emotional support" if something bad _had_ happened. My grin widened.

I waited another couple of minutes to give the impression I was further away, then rolled up to a stop in front of my Bella. She got into the car and tried to smile at me but worry marred it.

I picked up my com and called in to check for any accidents involving a 2008 yellow Porsche or anyone named Alice Cullen, but nothing came up.

"Do you know where she was going today?" I asked.

She shook her head. "I am assuming she went somewhere with Jasper, but neither of them will answer their phone. I don't know what I'll do if something is wrong, I don't have Edward's number... or her parent's number..." she trailed off anxiously.

I placed my hand on her knee and rubbed it soothingly with my thumb. "Don't worry; I'm sure she is fine. I'll find her." She nodded at me trustingly, which caused me to smile victoriously. "Now what is her number?"

She read it to me as I typed it into the laptop that was plugged into my dash. I assumed Alice would have a recent enough phone with GPS capabilities and as long as it was on, I would be able to locate her. My screen beeped before zeroing in on an address.

"There," I said, smiling to myself. "She is on Harvey Avenue. Do you know where that is?"

Her hand flew to her chest as she sighed in relief. "Yes, that is where Jasper lives." Her smile then took up her entire face. "Thank you so much, James."

I smiled back at her, grateful for the turn the day had taken. Feeling confident, I took the next step in my plan to secure her as mine and mine alone.

"Bella, would you like to get dinner with me tonight?" I asked.

She smiled sweetly. "That would be nice."

Elated, I headed in the direction of my favorite seafood restaurant. Alice called while in transit and I could hear her on the phone as she fell all over herself apologizing about falling asleep at Jasper's house. Bella had to reassure her countless times before they got off the phone.

As the hostess led us to a table I walked behind my Bella with my hand on the small of her back. It felt as if we had taken strides in our relationship and I was on top of the world. All she needed to take it to the next level was for me to come to the rescue at the right time and I had done it impeccably.

We sat across from one another and gave our orders to the waitress before falling into an easy conversation. Dinner passed effortlessly. I was ecstatic with how things were going, at least until I took the final step in my plan.

"Would you like to share a dessert?" I asked as our waitress cleared our plates.

She looked down to her lap before shaking her head slightly. "No, thank you. I'm full."

I shook my head at our server and waited until she had left before reaching across the table to lift Bella's chin with a hooked finger.

"Bella," I said, carefully choosing my words, "I really like you. I have enjoyed getting to know you over the last couple of weeks. I was hoping that we could maybe make it exclusive."

Her reaction was far from what I had desired.

First, her face looked pained. Then slowly, all the color drained from it. I fought to keep my own blank as I waited for her to find her voice. Finally she shook free from whatever had a hold of her.

"I... uh, listen, James, I like you too. And you have been amazingly patient and today," she paused, struggling again, "today you were so soothing and supportive... but," and my jaw clenched, "I don't want to label anything. I like things the way they are."

While I knew it was not a rejection, it took all of my self-control to not rip the table up and throw it across the room.

_Fucking Cullen_.

I would rip his head off. I would castrate him. He had to be the reason behind this.

I let my hand drop from her face before she noticed the violent shaking that was overcoming it. In my mind, images of a lifeless Edward flashed, quickly and automatically sorting through the possibilities of the quickest way to be rid of him. My favorites were the different ones that left indentations of my grip around his throat.

I was almost giddy, being able to consider the idea of harming him again. I had dismissed it before, taking a safer route, but this changed everything. I would do anything to have her, and if destroying Edward Cullen was necessary then I would happily oblige.

"James," Bella's sweet voice pulled me back to her. "Please, don't take this the wrong way, I really do like you. I'm just... new to this, is all." Her hand covered the one I had let fall from her face, now fisted on top of the table. I relaxed the hand and the color rushed back into my knuckles.

"I know," I attempted to sooth her before taking her hand in both of mine. "And I'll wait. I'll do whatever you need me to do." I meant it completely, even if it meant removing any and all distractions.

She relaxed and sat back in her seat.

After dinner we drove to the Puget Sound and took a leisurely walk. I was building courage, or determination, because I decided I _would_ kiss her. If she didn't want to label our relationship that was fine, I would deal with it. Finally being able to kiss her, to feel her lips against my own, would mark her as my own as much as any verbal commitment.

I asked her more about school and she opened up to me. She even went into how she had met Alice and Edward's parents in Gig Harbor the day before. I stiffened only for a fraction of a second at that news, trying not to let the anger boil up in that moment. At least I knew where she was and how to locate Edward's parents if she ever went missing again.

My confidence grew when I grabbed her hand and she never so much as flinched. I let our arms swing innocently between us, gradually letting her adjust to the close contact. I wanted to be sure she would be receptive when the right moment came.

Finally, I stopped and turned her to me, releasing her hand only to push both of mine into her hair as I pulled her face slowly to mine. I let my intention sink in and gauged her reaction. She did not resist, only seemed cautious which I assumed was only due to her nervousness in general, so I closed the remaining distance between us.

Her mouth was amazingly soft and warm. I kissed her once, twice, but then bit the inside of my cheek before I was tempted to push it any further. They were only innocent pecks, but I was more than willing to take my time with her. It would be worth it when she belonged to me, utterly and completely.

Bella POV

I crept back into the apartment quietly, not wanting to wake anyone as it was well after two in the morning. I would definitely not be going to my first class the next morning; that much I knew for sure.

James had been wonderful, but as soon as I saw Edward sitting on the couch with his laptop glowing in the dark, guilt rushed over me. I had no real reason to feel it, but it ate at me anyway.

It felt almost as if I was being pulled in two directions. In one direction, I had stability. I knew I would be cared for and cherished.

However, in the other direction...

The other direction seemed to hold so much more and so much less at the same time. I felt like the only thing that could come from Edward and I together would be love and passion and joy. The only problem was getting there.

His tired eyes looked up to meet mine.

"Hey," he said softly.

"Hey," I said back, pausing at the entrance of the hall. I had a strange urge to run back to my room before either of us could say anything more, but I forced myself to stay. I was terrified that something might be discovered in the coming conversation that would be detrimental to our strange and fragile status.

"How was your night?" he asked evenly, although I could tell he was straining to do so. Something was boiling under the surface of his calm facade.

"Alright," I answered, only a bit of indifference slipping into my tone.

His eyes moved back and forth between mine, trying to read them in the impossibly dark room. "Good," he finally said.

I stood there for another awkward minute, our eyes still watching the others' carefully for any sign of... well, anything.

"Well, I better..." I trailed off, nodding my head slightly in the direction of my room.

He sighed and nodded once before turning back to his screen.

I went back to my room and collapsed on my bed with a heavy sigh.

More than ever I hated the line I was being forced to walk. I wanted Edward, wanted him so bad that the fact that I couldn't have him was almost painful. At the same time, I had James, who was amazing in his own right, and he wanted me in a way Edward didn't, or couldn't, want me.

Kissing James had been nice, but that was it. The entire time I couldn't help but think of Edward, of how different the entire scene would have been with him. The entire night all I could think was how I was missing one of Edward's last few days here, and how wretched I felt when I thought about him not being at the apartment every evening.

Feeling exhausted, mentally and physically, I shut down my brain. No epiphany would come at 2:14 a.m. and I refused to let it consume me any longer.

*****_**Hides**_*** Please don't pelt me with cyber stones. As creepy as it was, James had to kiss Bella, and Edward had to know how late she was out in order to set up the next chapter. I promise to make it better but you have to give me time.**

**---The IndieTwificAwards are open, just in case you can think of a story you want to nominate ;) Even if you don't nominate this one, make sure to give some of the underappreicated authors out there the recognition they deserve. The link is in my profile. And hurry, they stop taking nominations on Tuesday!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: You know the drill. SM owns Twilight and the characters. I own a account.**

**A/N: My schmexy beta, herinfintieeyes, made this chapter all pretty, despite her hatred of mayonaise. I don't know what I'd do w/o her 3**

The couch absolutely emanated Edward. His scent was swirling around me, making it hard to concentrate on the presumably easy task of chewing cereal.

I was so excited about taking the morning off from school that taking the afternoon off was looking awfully tempting. I loved being alone in the apartment; I didn't have to worry about what I did or what I wore, I could just relax. Wearing ratty lounge clothes while engulfed in Edward's scent was marvelous.

Beyond the window, the outside was almost dark with the overbearing stormy clouds that dropped buckets of rain. I couldn't have picked a better day to stay home.

I spent most of the morning being the epitome of laziness, not even glancing at my schoolbooks as I listened to the radio and surfed the internet aimlessly. When noon came around, I popped a cd in and turned the volume up so I could hear it in the kitchen as I made lunch. When a favorite song with an upbeat tempo came on, I hummed along and even danced a little as I pulled condiments from the refrigerator for the masterpiece sandwich I was in the midst of creating.

I was returning the mayo to the door of the fridge, licking off the drop that had gotten onto my finger due to my bottomless well of gracelessness, when I caught a glimpse of a figure standing just out of sight in the dining room. I gasped and the mayo slipped from my hand before it crashed on the floor, my free hand then covering my gaping mouth.

The apartment was mostly dark due to the overcast sky and the only the dim light from my open bedroom door down the hallway outlined the figure, telling me that it was a man. My mind started racing, wondering who in the world was in there, how they got in there, and if I could make it to the door before they caught me, when I heard a dark chuckle.

_Wait... was that... Edward?_

The shadow took a step closer to me, allowing the light from the kitchen to reach his gorgeous face. As if on cue, _my _facelit like a tomato. How much had he seen?

"Sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you," he said, still laughing.

I huffed as I picked up the mayonnaise bottle from the floor and flung it back into the fridge. "How long were you standing there?"

"Long enough."

"What are you even doing here? Aren't you supposed to be working?" I asked, trying to let my anger hide my embarrassment.

"Aren't you supposed to be at school?"

I scowled at him, waiting for my answer before I gave mine.

He smiled at me as he opened the fridge to get the makings for his own lunch. "The meeting I had this afternoon was postponed. There were people coming in from Indianapolis but their flight was cancelled due to the weather," he explained as he stacked a sandwich twice as tall as mine.

"Will they reschedule it?" I asked.

"Yes, they already have. First thing tomorrow morning." He placed the top piece of bread on his sandwich and pressed it down before replacing all the ingredients.

"Aren't you leaving tomorrow?" I asked, surprisingly without letting my disappointment slip into my voice. We both sat down at the dining room table.

"Yes. I won't get to attend now," he replied.

We both took a bite of our food in silence. I tried to concentrate on chewing, but Edward in a suit was as distracting as a screaming infant on a plane, but distracting in a much better way. I also found that even watching his jaw move was extremely fascinating.

It was somewhat dark as the only light came from the kitchen, and that along with the quiescence of the room made sitting there, so close but so far away from the most perfect man alive, utterly unbearable. "So...," I said, racking my brain for anything to break the silence, "London?"

Edward only smiled and nodded.

"Have you been there before?" I prodded.

"Yes. This will be my... third time, I believe."

"Wow," I said, amazed that someone not that much older than me was so well traveled. "I would love to visit there sometime."

"You do realize that would involve being on a plane for a very long time, right?" he asked, referring to my new discovery of being terrified of heights.

I shuddered in response. I guess I was doomed to the east coast forever, as I wasn't a fan of extended car trips either.

Edward chuckled under his breath. "I could get you over that, you know."

"Over what? The heights thing?"

He nodded.

"That won't be necessary," I shook my head. "I have no desire to get over it, because that would mean trying it again."

"Now how will you ever see London with that kind of attitude?"

"I guess I won't. Besides, when would I even have the opportunity to go overseas anyway? I've only been outside the state of Washington once."

"Really?" he asked, seeming shocked.

I nodded as I swallowed the bite of sandwich that was in my mouth. "We went on vacation to California once when I was 9. Other than that..." I trailed off.

Edward shook his head in disbelief. "We definitely have to get you over that phobia. There is so much out there, Bella. The next time I'm back, I'll take you up."

I froze mid-chew. _Take me up? _

He laughed, "I have a small plane. We can go up, just you and me. There's nothing to it."

I looked at him with what I was sure was an expression of shock while trying not to choke on my bite.

"Don't worry about it now. Just think about it and get used to the idea. Then when I come back, we can try it."

Miraculously, I swallowed successfully. "When will you be back?" I asked in a voice made monotone from fear.

"I'll be in London for three weeks, then Miami for two," he said evenly.

My heart sank, and it had nothing to do with flying in the plane.

I decided to make lasagna for dinner, which conveniently meant I would have to run to the store for a few items. I wanted to spend time with Edward being he would leave in the morning, but every time I looked at him all I could think was that he was leaving. The thought made my chest want to cave in on itself.

I tried to tell myself that it was stupid to be so hurt over his leaving, that we barely knew each other, but it didn't dull the pain.

I spent too long at the store on purpose to waste time, but then realized if I wanted everything ready at a decent hour I needed to get going.

When I arrived home I fought the door before finally swinging it open, giving it an extra push of gusto in my hurry, when I heard an awful sound and the door rebounded back to me.

I had hit someone with the door.

I heard a slight 'oomph' from Edward and saw him in the next moment with his hand over his right eye.

"Edward! I'm so sorry! Are you alright?" Without thinking I dropped my bags to reach up and pull his hand away from his face. The jolt of energy that ran down my arm at the contact was almost enough to jerk my hand back, but it was soon forgotten as I watched blood begin to trickle down from Edward's eyebrow.

Oh Jesus. If I had done something to mark the world's most beautiful face I would surely be disowned by my own planet.

"Let me get something for that," I said before I shoved my bags inside and tore my way into the apartment, headed for the bathroom. I rummaged through the closet looking for medical supplies, quickly pulling out peroxide, a washcloth that I dampened, and a few bandages.

When I came back out Edward was sitting on the couch with his hand back in place. I walked over and sat next to him carefully.

"I am so sorry about-"

"Don't worry, it isn't nearly as bad as it looks," he interrupted, trying to ease my guilt. "I heard you struggling with your keys so I was going to get the door for you. I should have yelled or something. It was my fault."

I rolled my eyes. "Don't be silly."

I reached up to remove his hand again, but was ready for the sensation I felt that time. I watched his face carefully, focusing on his eyes and trying to ignore the injury I had caused. I was dying to know if that energy that surrounded us and spread like wildfire when we touched was multidirectional, and I searched his eyes frantically for any indication.

His eyes held mine for a moment, and then darted to my hand and back. At least I wasn't completely crazy, now that I could see he felt it too. I needed the reassurance that the strange chemical reaction that our closeness spurred was not my imagination.

It wasn't until the blood from his wound caused him blink rapidly that I realized we had been staring a beat too long again. I lifted the warm washcloth to his face and softly began to cleanse the area.

Neither of us spoke a word while I took my time removing the evidence of my carelessness. I noticed him watching me from the corner of my eye, which made it hard for me to concentrate on his wound.

When I had finally cleaned the area and started to disinfect it, I could see the small cut was right above his eyebrow. It wasn't very big, but certainly looked deep.

"Do you think we should go have this looked at? It looks deep. You might even need stitches," I said as I examined it carefully, trying to hide my grimace.

"I'll be fine," he said.

"Are you sure?"

He nodded.

I chose one of the smaller butterfly bandages I had retrieved and opened it.

"I hope it doesn't scar," I said, feeling awful all over again, but he shrugged.

"Scars are cool, right?"

I laughed. "Not if you get them from your sister's klutzy roommate." I pressed the small bandage across the cut.

"I'll have to come up with a better story then. I could always say I was defending your honor," he suggested with a smile.

"I didn't know you were so chivalrous," I teased.

I smoothed the bandage over his wound one more time than necessary before dropping my hand. We had scooted close to each other while I had been fixing him up, and it would have been normal for anyone else to move back then, to provide the other with their personal space once again, but neither of us moved.

I sat frozen despite the heat that notified me that we were so close the majority of our thighs were pressed against the other and effectively warming my entire body. As a result, my mind and body started an internal debate. My mind screamed to move away, to think of... uh... James, but my body simply could not resist the pull. My body was his, even if he didn't want it. I started to lean in even closer to him without thinking about the action as my body gave into the pull on its own accord.

My body was in complete control, up until the point when I watched Edward's tongue sweep across his lower lip and his eyes move to my mouth. My body wanted nothing more than to close the space, to let go and finally be with him. Nevertheless, my mind knew that allowing anything further would result in heartache and pain, that watching him leave would be more than I could take, and that realization made me jump to feet. I took off for the hall, knowing that if our connection was so strong without any intimate acts, it would only make his leaving the next day slightly less than torture.

I was half way down the hall to the safe haven of my room, where I would surely sob like a child, when I felt his hand grab my arm. I hadn't realized he'd followed me.

"Bella," he pleaded, "Please wait."

When I didn't stop he tightened his grip and pulled me back to him. In one swift motion he had me pinned, my back to the wall and every inch of him pressed against my front before his mouth collided with mine. His hands came up and cupped either side of my face while his lips moved frantically on mine, my own immediately reacting the same way. I whimpered my defeat as my hands rushed to touch any and every part of his body available in their newfound freedom.

My mind waved a white flag in surrender; there was no turning back.

More than anything, I was overwhelmed by the intensity that came with touching so much of his body at once. The feeling that spread from the occasional hand contact in the past had nothing on being pressed up against him; every inch of my skin felt alive.

His tongue only fell across my lips once before I parted them and took it in, letting it twist with my own. My wandering hands finally stilled as they wrapped tightly around his neck in an attempt to mold him permanently to me.

When he finally broke the kiss, both of were gasping for air. His lips lit a trail of fire down my jaw to my neck.

"God, Bella," he growled, "I've wanted to do this since the moment I opened my eyes to you in your bed weeks ago." He switched sides and attacked the skin on the other side of neck, his hands slowly making their way down my arms. "I was so afraid I would leave tomorrow and be tortured for the next five weeks with not having touched you."

Leaving tomorrow... five weeks... slowly the words made it back to mind, where the white flag went down and the red one flew up and flapped wildly.

I froze, causing Edward pulled away slightly, feeling the change in my demeanor. "What's wrong?"

James' words came back to me... _"I am sure he doesn't get too lonely at night"_... _"That type of work just lends itself to that kind of lifestyle." _

My eyes slowly met his which were heavily hooded with desire. Edward only wanted a fix to hold him over. My traitor body had ignored the siren in my mind, and now I would pay.

I felt a hot tear leak from my eye before I shoved him away and ran to my room, slamming and locking the door behind me.

Edward was at the door in an instant, wiggling the handle and banging on the door.

"Bella! What's wrong?" he shouted. "Bella?!"

Determined that one tear that fell would be the only one, I turned on the stereo, playing the cd from earlier to drown out the pleadings from the other side of the door.

What had I done? Why couldn't make myself stay away from him?

And James! Poor James, who was the sweetest, most patient guy, who put up with my insecurities, was to be repaid with my fickleness. I felt like the worst person in the universe as I buried my face in my hands.

I spent the rest of the evening in my bedroom, not even missing supper as my stomach was in knots. Edward and Alice both tried countless times to get me to let them in, but I ignored them well into the night, when I finally fell asleep.

The next morning I woke feeling empty. I could tell he was gone without even leaving the room. I sighed and rolled over, knowing there was no way I was going to consider even going to school. I needed at least one day to mourn.

I had been awake no more than ten minutes when a light tap sounded on my door.

"Come in," I sighed, but forgot the door was locked. I started to get out of bed, but I heard something jiggle in the doorknob before Alice entered. She looked up at me, shamelessly holding a key in her hand.

"But..." I started with a dumbfounded look. "Wa... why didn't you use that last night?"

"You weren't ready," she shrugged. I watched as she climbed up into my bed and sat beside me.

She never hounded me with questions or made any speculations, we just sat there quietly for a while. There was nothing to be said, because it was done.

Edward was gone.

**Aww, I know. They finally kissed and then back tracked about 10 paces. Have to have the angst!**

**For all of you that love ya some James (and surprisingly, there are **_**quite**_** a few of you between here and Twilighted) he is all set up to move into the boyfriend slot now. He couldn't have planned things better himself. **

**So... leave me a review! Tell me I suck for having Edward leave thinking "WTF?" or how much you hate James (or love him and think he's a sexy bitch)... I love getting all your thoughts on the story!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilght. I, on the other hand, own an unhealthy obsession with all things Twilight. Big diff.**

**A/N: Huge thanks to my beta, herinfiniteeyes, for being a-mazing, fixing my crap, and having long ol chats with me about this puppy. (OH, and for cheering me up at work). She also introduced me to the Myriad, the band featured in this chapter - who rock, btw. Please check them out after you read.**

**And without any further ado, I give you.... Creeptastic James!**

James POV

I watched gleefully as Edward strolled from the apartment complex toward his car before following him to the airport. It was to his benefit that he was leaving, because had he been around any longer, it would have resulted in a very unfavorable outcome for him. I was pleased that I had been able to restrain myself from harming him, but was truthfully only able to do so because I knew he was leaving. I wasn't sure when he was coming back, but I figured it would be a sufficient amount of time that would allow Bella and I to become inseparable.

I decided to personally make sure he made his plane as I kept a safe distance from him at SeaTac. The airport was busy enough that he would never spot me, even as close to him as I stayed. I glanced at my watch and noted that Bella would be leaving for school now and felt disappointed I wouldn't be able to see her until later. She had stayed home the day before due to our late date and I was only able to see her briefly on her trip to the store.

It hadn't gone unnoticed that Edward's car was there during most of the day as well, but I felt a strange calm in the knowledge that he was leaving the next morning. I checked often to make sure he had not changed his flight information, not sure if I would be able to control myself if he did. The calm demeanor I managed to maintain was not at all flexible to any move he made that pushed my already stretched limits.

Edward had a long face and heavy feet all morning that did not go unnoticed either; he did not want to leave. He didn't say a word to anyone the entire morning, not even giving as much as a head nod of acknowledgment to anyone. I had known that he was getting close to Bella, but it wasn't until I watched him sulk so outwardly that I realized how much. I filtered my anger over the issue, letting the information only bring me joy. By the time he returned, his feelings for her would be completely unrequited and it would be easier for me to ignore him and probably even laugh at his feelings with Bella.

I smiled at the thought.

They called the last boarding call for Edward's plane on the overhead speakers and he huffed as he stood. He reached for his phone and looked at it for a moment, starting to open it before hastily shoving it back into his pocket and walking toward his gate.

Victory washed over me as I watched the wheels of his plane leave the ground.

Bella POV

I don't know why I thought Edward would have called, but I did. I wouldn't have answered it anyway, but part of me wanted him to keep fighting. The fact that he didn't only proved me right and justified my actions. Looking back, I wished I would have ignored his comment about wanting to have me before he left, or that he wouldn't have said it, because I was fairly certain that even one night with a man that beautiful would have been worth it.

I sighed, resisting the regret. I had made the right decision and would not convince myself otherwise.

The next morning I got ready for school with my head held high. I knew it was a facade, but I also knew it was pointless and even a little absurd to mourn for more than a day over the loss of someone I never had.

I stuffed myself full of faux aloofness and made my way to the kitchen, deciding to whip up something special for breakfast for Alice. She had been amazing the day before, skipping school and lounging around with me all day. Not once did she ask me if I was ok or try to get me to talk to her about what had happened; instead she brought a stack of magazines that we flipped though lazily and painted my toenails while we discussed a little bit of everything.

"Mmmm, Bella, what smells so good?" I heard her ask as she skipped into the kitchen.

"Blueberry pancakes," I told her, grinning. She was always so excited about whatever it was that I was cooking, which made me happy too. She was definitely my number one fan.

She grabbed plates from the cabinets along with glasses and juice and we sat down in the dining room to eat together.

Her eyes rolled back into her head as she took the first bite. "Bella, these are amazing!"

"Thanks," I told her.

"Seriously, Bella, where did you learn to cook?"

I shrugged as I took my own bite. "I guess I kind of picked it up on my own. My mom is not much of a cook and I figured out pretty quick that if anyone in our house was going to eat at all I better learn."

"So you cooked for your whole family?" she asked with an awe-induced look. "Even Emmett?"

"Yeah," I laughed. "I think he was the most thankful I picked up that skill."

She shook her head in amazement, obviously aware of the ridiculous amount of food my brother was capable of putting away.

"Hey, speaking of, he and Rosalie are going to this club Thursday night to see The Myriad and I think Jasper and I are going too. You should come," she suggested. She paused thoughtfully before adding, "It might cheer you up."

She pointedly stared at me for a moment before I realized what she was doing - leaving an opening for me to finally tell her what had happened. She deserved it; she had been a great friend, and the situation involved two people she cared about. At the same time, my wound was still too raw for debridement. I studied my plate while I hid the parade of emotions that surfaced from even allowing Edward back in my mind.

When I felt confident that the mask of indifference was back in place, I met her eyes. "Yeah. It sounds like fun."

That evening I called James. I decided the concert was the perfect opportunity to take my first step toward him and simultaneously away from Edward. He seemed ecstatic that I was the one making plans with him and I almost felt guilty. I had allowed Edward to royally muck up the budding relationship and I made a silent resolution to fix that.

*

The line to get into the bar that was featuring the Myriad spilled out of the establishment's doors, into the streets and around the corner. Luckily Rosalie knew the owner of the bar and we walked right up and in. I was extremely thankful when James grabbed my hand as we entered, keeping me close in the crowd. I had never been in a place so jammed packed with bodies. A cover band wailing on the stage made them all writhe and bump into each other, and me, and I clutched to James' hand with all my strength.

Rosalie led our small group toward the front, and even though I brought up the end I thought I could hear her yelling at people to not touch her and that she was "Pregnant for fuck's sake!" I wanted to laugh, because I saw those in her way were shrinking away, creating a path for her. I wouldn't dare cross her either.

We soon found ourselves only feet from the stage and we crowded together. About that time the warm-up band wrapped their session up and some intermission music played a few songs at a much lower decibel, allowing us to be able to talk to one another.

Alice had made a sour face when James showed up to escort me to the club, but didn't say a word. She was obviously still very confused as to what had happened to make Edward bang on my door for hours and then had me out with James the same week.

She and Jasper took drink orders and headed toward the bar while the rest of us stood making small talk. Emmett and James started discussing something to do with their work and I tuned them out. While it was extremely important that anyone I dated be able to get along with my family, I had no desire to hear about any morbid police cases.

I turned to Rosalie. "You seem to be doing a little better," I guessed, due to her even being out of the house.

"Yeah, today at least. The bad days seem to be getting fewer and far in between."

"Good," I said. "Have you talked Emmett into finding out what you're having yet?"

She rolled her eyes and huffed at this. My brother was evidently adamant about waiting until the birth to know whether the baby was a boy or girl. "No, but I have two more months before it's even an option. He'll be worn down by then," she smiled in spite of herself. I smiled too, because I didn't doubt her in the least.

Jasper and Alice found us then, drinks in hand. When Alice noticed the deep conversation between my date and my brother she walked up to me, grabbed my arm, and led me a few feet away.

She looked at me wide-eyed for a minute, her mouth gaping with a loss for words. Finally, a "What the hell?" came out. I couldn't help the eye roll in return.

"Not now, Alice. I'll explain later."

"No, tell me now. Why is he here?" she motioned her head slightly in James direction.

I chanced a glance at him from the corner of my eye to make sure he wasn't aware of our pow wow. He was still listening to Emmett describe some god awful domestic violence case and I turned my eyes back to Alice.

"I'm sorry," I told her sincerely. "I'll tell you everything later, I promise. But it all boils down to the fact that with his job, Edward isn't really... available." I decided to leave out his promiscuous behavior as being another reason, deciding that Alice would rather not have such information, being his sister and all.

"You're giving up on him for logistics?" she asked me incredulously.

"Alice, the logistics are pretty major," I countered. Surely she realized that.

"So you aren't even going to try?"

My eyes dropped to the floor as I thought. I didn't want to give up on him, but unless he made a major career change, it just wasn't possible. And I would never dare ask him to give up his job; it was obviously important to him. I'd seen the way he talked about it, as if he looked forward to everyday and every little thing that he discovered.

"Bella, if you want James, then that is your decision," Alice said, luring my eyes back to hers. "But you should at least talk to Edward. I am not screening calls for you anymore."

"Screening calls?" I asked, my eyebrows knitting together.

"Yes. Edward has been calling, asking for you. I told him to give you some time, but you need to make a decision and then stick to it. And when you do, you need to let Edward know whatever it is."

She was right and I knew it. I had handled things poorly, not even explaining to poor Edward why I had fled the hallway while fighting tears when seconds before I was trying to mold him to my body. Looking back, it was my own fault he thought I was up for a quick romp before he left.

I sighed and nodded in defeat. I didn't say anything else to Alice, but I knew I had to move on from Edward. Even if he wanted more than that one time lay, his job got in the way and that was that. I decided I would call him the next day, explain my irrational behavior, and then let him go.

Not ten minutes later, the lights dimmed and the entire place went up in screams. The Myriad was a very popular local group with a fairly large following, and it was no surprise that there were so many excited people here to see them.

I felt James move behind me in the dark and place his hands on either side of my waist. I swallowed thickly and swatted away memories of other hands on me. Tonight was to forget, to give myself a fresh start with James without the overbearing presence of anyone else.

I sighed and forced myself to relax into him as the stage blazed with lights, revealing the band as chords from first song started. It would have been easy to get lost in the strong beats and altogether amazing music, but my brain was in overdrive.

First and foremost on my mind were James' hands: at times they would drift down toward my thighs, or up higher on my waist so that they were resting on top of my hip bones. Both were distracting. His fingers and hands also felt heavy and thick, and when they rested on the thin material of my shirt I could feel their callused roughness.

Edward's hands had been lithe and smooth, almost as if their touch could heal. They claimed and comforted at the same time.

James' just claimed.

It wasn't as if I wasn't already aware of both of the guys' differences; they were obviously two different breed of male. Edward was educated and smooth around the edges while James was more the type who couldn't feel like a guy unless his hands were dirty. Nothing was wrong with either logic, but as James' rough hands moved against me I caught myself frowning and longing for the other touch.

I started to think that maybe I shouldn't continue things with James if I so desperately wanted that other touch, even if it couldn't be Edward's. If it were truly the softer and lighter hands and attitude I wanted, then James was not the right guy for me. But then I pondered if I would feel any different about Edward if he were more of a rough and tumble kind of guy, and I knew instantly that it wouldn't matter.

I sighed in frustration just as a somewhat slower song began. A few notes intp the song, James began to sway back and forth to the melody, his hands moving me with him. I realized then that I had spent the entire night thus far I comparing Edward to James, even after I'd sworn that the night would be the new beginning for James and me.

I cleared my head once and for all, and then moved willingly with James as I forced myself to enjoy the last of the concert. Once I had discussed things with Edward and got closure, I was sure I would be able to officially move on.

James, the most patient man alive, kissed me chastely at the end of the night at the door of my apartment. I didn't deserve his endless kindness and patience, but he gave it so willingly that I figured he didn't really mind the pace we had set. Well, that I had set.

As I walked in, I noticed Alice had left Edward's cell phone number on a small note pad that rested in the middle of the dining room table. I looked at it begrudgingly, not wanting to make the call. I didn't want to take away that small possibility of something with Edward by ending everything before it began. I wanted hope that one day, maybe once Edward had sown his wild oats and decided he was ready for a change of pace, that we could make an attempt at something.

Furious at myself for allowing even a smidgen of longing remain, I swiped the note pad from the table and took it back to my room. I would not put my life on hold in the hopes that maybe one day Edward would want something with me. I owed James a chance at something real with me. All of me.

I closed my door forcefully, walked to my bed and flopped down. Pulling out my phone I dialed the number and resisted the urge to save it under my contacts.

I took a deep breath before pressing send.

His phone rang four or five times, and just when I was expecting his voicemail, he answered.

"Hello?" his voice questioned, not recognizing the number.

"Edward?" my voice shook, all the anger I had built up flew out the window. I was suddenly at a loss for words as I sat up on the bed and picked at my fraying pant leg of my jeans. "It's Bella. I'm not interrupting, am I?"

"No, no, not at all. I'm glad you called." He sounded sincere.

"Alice told me you had been trying to reach me." My heart was practically beating its way out of my chest cavity. "I owe you an explanation."

The other end of the phone was silent as he waited, but I couldn't muster up the words I needed to say. I had to do this for my own peace of mind, but my heart continued to beat wildly and squeezed uncomfortably whenever I opened my mouth to begin. I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my free arm around them, clutching them to me as I took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry about the way I acted the other evening. I... I just got overwhelmed, and... I can't be that girl for you."

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"I can't be that girl. The one you only see when you're in town, only sleep with because it's convenient," I almost choked on the word 'sleep.' I couldn't believe I was able to get anything coherent out.

"What gave you the impression that was all I wanted?" he challenged.

"Well, it's just that...," I stumbled, having trouble remembering all the reasons why I couldn't be with him. "I don't see how you could have anything more than that. I mean, James said-"

"James?" his voice was steady, but I could hear the anger underlying it. "What did he say about me?"

"Nothing... well," I stuttered all over myself, realizing I shouldn't have brought his name up. "He just mentioned that your type of job... was more conducive... for that kinda relationship."

He was quiet for a minute; all I could hear was his heavy breath which was apparently traveling hastily through his nostrils. It was a minute before he regained his voice.

"Bella, I never wanted that," his jaw sounded tight.

My voice was deflated. "What else is there?"

"A relationship," his voice softened and coddled me, causing my heart to drop heavily into my stomach. He wanted me, wanted all of me - and it made me sick to my stomach to know that I still couldn't have him. Because in reality he was in London, then he'd be in Miami, and then who knows where. All I knew is that he couldn't _really_ be with me while he flew all over the place for his job.

I choked back the bile and tears. "It doesn't matter what you call it, Edward. At the end of the day, it is what it is, which would be me here for whenever it would be convenient for you while you traveled the world."

"It wouldn't be like that. We could make it work," he offered. I wanted so badly to believe him, but I knew better. "We could talk on the phone, and I could probably get to Seattle once a month." He paused and I could hear him sigh before he repeated, "We could make it work."

I shook my head even though he couldn't see me. "No, Edward, it wouldn't." I wanted to say I wanted all of him, not just his spare time. Part of me wanted what I could get, any part of him, but I knew deep down that it would not be enough, that it would cause more pain than pleasure.

"Bella, please, just think about-"

"I can't," I pleaded with him, afraid if he said please one more time I would fold. "We can be friends, but that is all your job really allows." The next sentence slipped out in little more than a whisper as I closed my eyes. "That's all we can be."

A long stretch of silence hung between us, I'm not sure for how long. I bit back the urge to take it all back, to take anything he would give me. I knew if the conversation had taken place in person I would have given in to anything he wanted. I was glad to have the barrier of the phone to strengthen my reserve.

"Listen, Edward, I should get to bed. I-"

"So I can still call you?" he interrupted me.

I knew I would regret it later, that it would come back and bite me in the butt, and hard, but at the moment I couldn't find it in me to care. I could be friends with Edward. Like I said, the majority of the friendship would take place over the phone. The phone was safe, right?

"Sure."

Then we were quiet again, because there was nothing more to say. The conversation had been surreal, voicing our wants and feelings, but in the end not being able to see eye to eye. As the silence took on an awkward quality, I sighed in exhaustion.

"I should go to bed. I have to be at the library tomorrow morning."

He returned the sigh, his sounding like defeat. "Alright," he agreed. "I'll talk to you soon."

I smiled, but then it dropped immediately. I was already looking forward to our next conversation when I should be putting all thoughts of him behind me.

"Good night, Bella," he murmured softly.

"Night." I replied before falling back into my bed.

**Warning! Epic note ahead. All the same, please take a sec to read it all.**

**Alright, before you sacrifice me to the cyber gods, I want to point out a couple of things about Bella here. She is 19, from a small town, and has no experience with relationships (she mentioned in chapter 3 she was new to dating - I want to clarify this means that she maybe had a couple of dates in high school that didn't amount to anything, and yes, she is still a V). She is also very level-headed and somewhat of an introvert. **

**Add all this together, and you get a girl who is not only cautious of relationships in general, but when someone that she has an overwhelming connection with (i.e., Edward) comes along this only makes her more uneasy. She is also being practical (hence, the name of the story) and that means when she is faced with the options of Edward, who is unearthly beautiful and she feels so much for so fast; and James, who (to her) is safe and taking things slow, she tends to lean more toward the safer option. Is she wrong/stupid/scared/blind? Yes. Using his job as an excuse? Yes. But that doesn't mean she won't come to her senses eventually (obviously, this is an E/B story).**

**Sorry for this little story analysis, but after talking with my beta, I wanted to make sure all of this was clear and not have everyone hating on Bella.**

********Practicality**** has been nominated for an ****Indie TwiFic Award****! Voting for the first round starts Wednesday, July 8, so get your be-hinds over there, read some great stories, then vote! Link is in my profile.**

**Reviews make my day, and make me want to write faster.... just sayin' ;)**


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and the characters. I own a very unhealthy addiction to Twilight and the world of FF.**

**A/N: Shocked I'm alive? I know, it has been forever right? But I seriously have good excuses, like my kids getting sick, then of course sharing with me and getting me sick, and after all that mess my beta was away on vaca. And trust me, it is worth waiting for her to make sure this shit doesn't suck. **

**To my lovely beta, herinfiniteeyes, thanks girly. Love you for real. My offer to take you Amish shopping for your birthday still stands.**

**Thanks to everyone responses from the last chapter and for being so understanding for B's sake. I did get asked how old everyone is and I thought I would take the opportunity to mention that to everyone. Bella is 19, Alice is 20, Jasper is 22, Edward is 23, Emmett & Rosalie are 24, and James is 25. I got 'em all over the place ;)**

**There is another A/N at the end. I apologize in advance.**

"You don't strike me as a pet person," James commented, rocking back and forth in my desk chair. I was sitting across the room from him on my bed with a book in my lap when I looked up. He was staring curiously at the fish that sat on the desk next to him.

"What?"

"I never pegged you as someone who would want a pet," he said again, still watching the fish swim aimlessly.

"Oh. Well, I guess it is my first," I admitted, at which he smiled knowingly. I turned my eyes back to the fish. "Actually, I guess it's really not even mine."

His expression went from smug to confused.

"It's actually Edward's. He won it at that fair weeks ago and asked me to keep it for him," I told him.

His eyes darted to the bowl, his eyebrows low as he studied the fish as if it had committed some sin. I suddenly realized that he might not be crazy about the fact I was keeping something for another guy.

"If it bothers you I'm sure Alice could keep it in her room," I offered. I truthfully wanted to keep the fish, but I didn't want to upset James over something so small.

When he met my eyes again they were clear. "Don't be silly; I don't care that you keep it. It's just a fish."

I smiled, relieved he wasn't worried about it. I looked back down at my homework and sighed. Things with James had progressed nicely over the last two weeks since Edward had left. We had gone out a few times, but mostly hung out at my apartment due to my increase in homework as of late.

He was still the epitome of patience, seeming to be satisfied with just my presence, which had honestly shocked me more than anything. The only guy I had dated in high school went for second base after 'going out' for no more than two weeks. I had been seeing James, albeit casually, for almost six.

Despite his lack of action, he seemed self-confident in his position in my life, and I couldn't find reason to argue. I enjoyed his company, even though we didn't have a ton in common. He preferred action movies, video games and all the other guy staples, while I stuck happily to my books and schoolwork. He didn't seem to mind the differences, and I found I didn't either.

A few nights before, we had gone the furthest we'd ever been. We had gone to dinner at a quiet and romantic restaurant and afterward, he drove me home in his car. Before I got out I leaned over to kiss him sweetly, and didn't hold back when he decided to escalate things.

His hand came across the console and skimmed my stomach before he used it to pull me closer. Once he had better access, his hand slid to the hem of my shirt, lingered there for a bit, and then slid it underneath to touch the bare skin of my stomach. I tried to hide my reaction. I didn't want to encourage him any further, but I didn't want to push him away either.

I found myself at this crossroad often when it came to the idea of 'us.' I liked him; I wanted to be around him and I always had fun with him. Unfortunately, when it came down to the physical aspects, I still felt unsure and uncomfortable. I wasn't sure why, but I had a feeling of unease, or even guilt, wash over me whenever things reached that level.

I assumed it was due to Edward. The one time we had kissed in the hall, everything had moved and progressed so naturally. From our hands to our bodies to the kiss itself, everything was fluid and effortless.

I was furious with myself for it, but every time I kissed James the kiss with Edward infiltrated my thoughts, leaving me feeling angry and empty.

I must not have hid my feelings well, because James only ghosted across my ribs a few times before I felt his hand fist under my shirt and a few seconds later he removed it.

Aggravated, I shooed away the memory.

"Do you know when he is coming back?" James asked out of the blue after almost ten minutes of silence. When I looked at him, he was still flipping through his guns and ammo magazine, trying really hard to look like the answer didn't matter to him.

"Edward?" I asked, making sure we were on the same page.

"Yeah." He still didn't look up.

"Um, I think in a few weeks." I decided to omit the fact that I knew he was coming back three weeks from the upcoming weekend, and that I knew this information because we talked on the phone.

He nodded once and then flipped the page of his magazine. I couldn't blame him; I couldn't imagine anyone not feeling intimidated by Edward. He was only the most beautiful man alive.

I found that I still felt stung by his absence, especially when he called. We had talked five times over the last couple of weeks, usually about nothing important. He would ask me about school and work, and I would ask him about the places he had seen and acted like I understood when he excitedly told me about some new piece of equipment he had discovered.

He had initiated all the calls thus far due to his crazy schedule and the fact that I never knew what time it was in London. I would probably figure it out right before his time zone would change again when he went to Florida the next week.

I glanced over at my phone to ensure it was still on vibrate. Edward's calls were erratic and I never knew when to expect them, and when I was with James I made sure the phone was silent. I didn't want anything to upset the relationship I was developing with James and while the calls were friendly and innocent, I knew James would not appreciate them.

With a flick of his wrist, James tossed his magazine on my desk before he stood and crossed the room. Once he reached the side of my bed, he leaned down and rested his weight on his fisted hands placed on either side of me. I looked up at him and smiled.

"I better head home and start to get things ready. I'll see you tonight?" he asked.

"Seven o'clock," I confirmed, smiling as he closed the short distance between our mouths. His kiss was the same as always, sweet and gentle. I accepted it, appreciative for this man who never pushed me. I was somewhat worried about later, about being alone with him at his apartment, but I had no reason to be. I knew he would be a gentleman.

All the same, it felt like a big step. He had invited me over to his apartment for dinner, which he was cooking himself; not to mention it would also be the first time I saw his place. Determined not to linger on that line of thought, I turned back to my book.

I stood in the shower, purposely facing away from the bottle of shampoo that Edward had left on the bottom shelf. I had spent the last two weeks analyzing its meaning: either he left by accident or on purpose. I mulled over everything, from the fact that he had not left anything in the bathroom after his first visit, to deciding he left it with the intention that I would see it every time I showered and therefore think of him everyday. Perhaps he had caught me trying to smell him once and thought I would appreciate having part of his scent handy in his absence.

Or maybe it was a complete accident.

I huffed and exited the shower stall, aggravated that another shower had been spent thinking about that stupid bottle despite oaths not to. I wrapped a towel around my head and then another around my body before leaving the bathroom and the shampoo debate behind me.

I heard my phone ring from the hall and clutched the towel around me tightly as I sprinted to my room, pathetically excited about hearing Peter, Paul & Mary belt out "_I'm leavin' on a jet plane, I don't know when I'll be back again_."

I became flushed every time I heard the song and wanted to change it on the account that if anyone ever heard it I would die, but the song was undeniably Edward's.

I flung my door open and then back shut behind me before plopping down on my bed stomach first, all while grabbing for my phone which laid on the center.

"Hello?" I asked breathlessly as I flipped it open.

"Hey, Bella," Edward's voice sauntered. "Why are you out of breath?"

"I was in the shower and I was trying to make it to the phone before you gave up on me," I admitted.

He chuckled softly. "I see. So, how are you today?"

"Good, I guess. I went to school this morning and then spent the afternoon studying," I said, skipping over the guest I had while doing so. "How about you?"

"I actually had today off and I did a little shopping."

"Shopping?"

"Yes," he confirmed.

"What kind of stuff did you get?" I asked, trying to imagine him loaded with shopping bags as he wandered around London.

"I can't tell you," he said teasingly.

"Why not?"

"I got something for you."

"Why would you do that?" I asked, honestly curious. What in the world would he get me anyway?

"I told you I would, for keeping my fish," he stated as if it were obvious.

"And I told you not to," I countered.

"It's nothing to worry about. So, what are your plans for tonight?" he asked, changing the subject to avoid my reprimand.

"Oh, I'm... going to a friend's for dinner," I tried to keep my voice even.

"Which friend?" he asked, apparently noticing my attempt to dance around the question.

I stalled for a moment, not wanting to lie but also not wanting to admit my relationship with James. I had found a way to avoid that subject up to that point.

"Bella?" Edward asked after a pregnant silence.

I sighed. "James," I said, deciding to be honest. "I'm going to James' apartment."

Edward answered with a silence of his own.

"That's nice," he finally managed a moment later. "How are things with the two of you?"

I moaned internally. He didn't really want to talk about this did he? I would rather take a good beating than discuss James with Edward, or vice versa for that matter. Nonetheless, I went along with my honesty gig.

"Alright, I guess. He's a nice guy," I answered.

"So you like cops, eh?" he asked. His voice was still tight but I could tell he was trying to lighten it a bit.

"I don't know. I guess that makes sense; my dad and brother are both cops, but I don't know that I necessarily have a 'type' or anything." Under my breath, I added, "I haven't dated enough to have a type."

"What?" Edward asked.

I bit my lip. I didn't really want to go into my non-existent dating history with him, only because I was sure his history was full of beautiful women.

"Did you say you haven't really dated?"

"Not really," I told him. "I dated two guys in high school, but they weren't serious."

"Really?" he asked, seeming shocked.

"Yeah, but you don't have to act so surprised."

"I just can't believe you haven't dated more. I mean, you're just so smart, and beautiful."

"Pfft," was all I could say in return, happy he was not present to see me turns ten shades of red.

"I mean it, Bella. Any guy would be lucky to have you," he said softly.

I was sure I was crimson. "What about you?" I asked, trying to deflect the attention. "I can't imagine you having any trouble dating."

"Eh," he replied. "I've only dated a few people myself."

"How many?" I pushed. He had been so ready to defend himself against James' accusations that it made me curious how true they were.

"Only one seriously." He was being vague.

"How seriously?"

He sighed. "We dated for about a year."

"Really? Can I ask what happened?" I wasn't sure of our boundaries yet, but I figured it was a safe bet I was pushing them.

"I believe you are familiar with the reasons my relationships don't work, Bella," he said, sounding exhausted all of a sudden. I took my cue to drop the subject and glanced at the clock.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry. I better get going anyway, I need to get ready."

"Alright," he agreed. "Just, Bella..."

"Hmm?"

"Be careful."

I crinkled my forehead at his request. James was a cop, how much more careful could I get?

"Sure," I said to appease him.

James POV

I loved watching Bella eat. Her pouty lips would wrap so completely around her utensil before she would pull it out slowly. Watching her take small, neat bites of her salad, I decided her mouth was definitely my favorite feature.

She smiled as I watched her.

"Everything good?" I asked.

"Very. Thank you for all of this," she said sweetly.

"No problem," I winked at her. I didn't mind doing anything for her. I would cook, clean my apartment meticulously (which I had done only hours ago), even wait months for her to be ready to take the next step.

I was nothing if not patient.

She had been quiet for most of the dinner and while I didn't mind spending the time to study her every feature, I knew she would be more comfortable with conversation. I decided to ask her something that had been on my mind since the concert we had attended a couple of weeks ago.

"Bella, can I ask you a question?"

She sat her drink down on the table and swallowed quickly. "Sure."

"Does my line of work bother you?"

A smile broke out on her face. "Of course not. Why do you ask?"

I shrugged as if the following had not been weighing on my mind. "I was just curious. I noticed when Emmett and I started talking about work at that Myriad concert you adverted your attention."

"I just don't like hearing about it, is all. I grew up around police work and then Emmett joined the force and while I respect what you guys do, I would rather block out some of the mental images I get when listening to stories."

"Oh that's right, your dad is a cop too," I said, although I had not forgotten.

"Chief," she reminded me thoughtfully.

"Right. So, it doesn't bother you? It's not too much of the same thing?"

"No," she clarified. Then a slow smirk emerged. "But what if I did mind? What would you have done?"

I laughed. "I guess I would put in for a transfer. Maybe a desk job." I suggested.

She shook her head disbelievingly. "Well, don't do anything on my account. I believe everyone should do what makes them happy."

I reached across the table and took her hand in mine. "And I believe in doing whatever makes you happy."

Her face turned a wonderful shade of scarlet.

I put on a movie after dinner and sat next to her on my couch. I gave her reasonable space but decided putting my arm on the back of the couch above her head was acceptable. She looked over at me and smiled, studied my face for a moment, and then scooted closer to me.

I kept my victory dance within.

It had taken her longer than I expected, which I still blamed on Cullen, but the journey didn't matter. We had reached the goal, the destiny, where she trusted me and had made a move on her own. This had been my objective all along, and I could barely contain my excitement.

Keeping my eyes on her and judging for any reaction, I dropped my arm from the back of the couch and around her shoulders, pulling her closer into me. She didn't flinch but didn't nuzzle into my side either, which I accepted. I had gained a small victory and nothing could bring me down.

When she turned her face up to look at me I was almost undone when I glanced down into her big, beautiful eyes. They shone with trust and contentment. Without my permission, my free hand came up, cupped her face and pulled her lips towards my own. At first I was too shocked by my own instinct to stop it, but when she followed the rogue hand's direction easily, I let it play out.

When our faces where close enough that our noses skimmed each other's, I stared into her eyes. Hesitance was clear in them, but before I could judge them any further she squeezed them shut and closed the distance between our mouths.

My shock over her hasty decision quickly gave way to lust as she threw herself whole-heartedly into her mission. Her mouth pressed firmly into mine and I found myself hardly able to control my desire. I could somewhat sense that her motions were slightly frantic, as if she was trying to overcompensate for the slow progress of our relationship.

Although it was extremely difficult, I slowed her down and set an even pace. With my guidance our lips found a slower rhythm at which she relaxed. Dare I hope this night might turn into something spectacularly more than I expected, but we were not going to rush into it. It would be slow and calculated, and I would assess her willingness every step of the way. My goal was to have her long term, not just for one heated night. If I didn't let her reach that decision while she was in her right mind, we would take steps back instead of forward in the relationship.

My tongue tested her mouth and she accepted, leaning further into me. While the kiss was passionate, I felt she was in control enough to attempt advancing.

I had only tried it once a few days ago, sliding my hand under her shirt and toward her swollen breasts, but her body had stiffened. It was slight, but following my own rules I stopped. I brushed it off as nerves on her part and let it go. Never had I taken as much time with anyone as I had with her, but it only made her all the more worth it.

Steeling myself for her reaction, I allowed my hand that had been resting on her hip to rise in steady increments on top of the material of her shirt. This did not seem to faze her so I pushed upward and onward, till my thumb grazed the side of her left breast.

When she did not stiffen I allowed the thumb to wander, slowly sliding back and forth over her in the small area within my reach. She leaned into me more, giving me silent permission to proceed.

As I began to oblige happily, strange music drifted in from the dining room. I was set to ignore it but as the sound reached Bella, she froze. She abruptly broke the kiss and our embrace as she stood and sprinted toward the dining room. I finally realized her phone had made the noise and she was in a hurry to get to whoever was calling.

I strained to pick up what song was playing. Her purse muffled the sound of the phone, but once she freed it, the lyrics washed over me in perfect clarity.

Red tinted my vision.

Bella POV

It felt like the air in James' apartment was thick and laced with some kind of heavy chemical although I knew it was just a slight panic attack at having Edward call me while I was in the middle of throwing myself at James.

I finally reached my phone and jammed my finger on the 'end' button before turning it off completely. I wanted to smack myself in the head for not turning the stupid thing on vibrate, and then again for assigning Edward his own ringtone.

I took a shaky breath as James appeared, and even I could tell the face he wore was a carefully constructed mask of indifference.

He had heard.

"Everything alright?" he asked, his voice just a touch too sweet.

I tried to hum an "mmm hmm" but all the moisture in my mouth had vanished and I was reduced to nodding. After struggling through a dry and difficult swallow, I finally said, "I'm sorry, I know it's still kind of early, but I should probably head home. I have an early shift tomorrow."

James formed a small, tight smile before nodding and grabbing his keys.

**Alright! **

**Now, I want to delve into James a little here, because he may seem out of character a bit in this chapter. While yes, James is psycho and creepy, he does not think there is anything super extreme about his behavior. He realizes others may find it a bit much, which is why he is so careful, but to him he is not really doing anything wrong.**

**This is why he is able to be so sweet and caring with Bella, tending to her needs and seeming like a gentleman.**

**I also want to point out how patient he is. In my mind, a guy with his tendencies doesn't normally jump into a relationship right away with a girl they become infatuated with, they would normally stalk them for a while before anything actually progressed. And once in the relationship, they would be extremely careful and patient so not to scare away the one they are obsessed with. I don't think the really bad qualities would be seen unless something tries to separate them, wherein they lose it. This is what you all keep asking me for and it is coming, I promise ;)**

**Now, don't worry, James in the next chapter is daaaaaaark and not fluffy whatsoever. **

**Please take a sec and tell me what ya think!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight. **

**A/N: Know who is awesome? herinifinteeyes, my lovely beta. She shields all of your eyes against the horrendousness that is my first draft. Check her out for some amazing stories and yummy treats. She is under my favorite authors in my profile.**

**I apologize if my weird humor is lost on you in the beginning of this chapter. I find the goofiest stuff utterly hilarious and couldn't find it in me to take it out. Just ignore it if it bothers you.**

Puyallup didn't seem disturbed by his new small environment - a glass from our cabinet - while I furiously scrubbed his bowl with scalding hot water. Even though I was pretty sure it would have been acceptable to do it somewhat less, I cleaned his home out completely at least once a week. I was determined not to kill my first pet.

As I moved on to rinsing his rocks I frowned at the mess they had become in just six days.

"You're disgusting," I scowled at the fish.

He swam in place in response.

"Edward really owes me for this, you know."

Bubble, bubble.

The truth was I liked the stupid fish. I talked to it more than I cared to admit, even found myself discussing homework with it at times, but I refused to believe that my attachment to it had anything to do with it belonging to Edward. Honestly, it was my fish; Edward would never be able to come and say, "Alright, I'm ready to take him to my place."

At that thought, I felt sorry for Edward, finding it hard to imagine not having a place to call home, no matter how seldom you were there. Even his fish had a luxury that he did not know.

It had been a week since I had heard from him and I was trying not to let it get to me. I had, after all, accused him of sabotaging my date.

After James had taken me home and I had time to get over being extremely embarrassed about Edward's ringtone and the fact that James now knew that we communicated, realization dawned on me.

I had told him about the date.

I had told him about the date, and he had called during it on purpose. Then I figured out that at the time he called in Seattle it would have been the middle of the night in London, making the call seem even more suspicious. Allowing my chagrin to simmer into anger, I called him.

As soon as he answered he immediately started apologizing profusely, subsequently letting the wind out of my sails. I found it impossible to stay mad at him. He then went on to explain that he had meant to call someone from work but had accidently called me, being the last person he had dialed.

I listened to him apologize in order to make himself feel better, but when he offered to call James and explain I insisted that wasn't necessary. After seeing James' face after he realized I was not only talking to Edward while he was away, but had assigned him his own song on my phone, I could only imagine what he would do if Edward actually called him.

I tried not to focus on the fact that Edward had not called me since that particular conversation, deciding that he probably had a lot of things to wrap up before heading back to the United States. I also reasoned that maybe it was for the best, at least for mine and James' sake.

When I saw James the next day he looked and acted as if the whole incident had never happened and I happily played along. If he could put it behind him, then so could I. Things had been back to normal between us ever since then.

I sat up P's home again, moving the tree to the corner to give him a change of scenery before adding him back into the bowl.

"Stay out of trouble," I warned, then rolled my eyes at my attempt to be humorous with a fish.

*

The cab of my truck was impossibly stuffed with grocery bags that crowded me against my door as I drove back toward my apartment.

Intending to use the bed of my truck rather than the cab for the goods, I had purposefully waited until the ungodly hour it had become to go shopping, banking on the weatherman's promise that the sky would clear. Instead I scowled at the offensive rain as it pelted my vehicle persistently and tried not to curse the useless weatherman under my breath.

To top off my night, the bagger at the grocery store had shamelessly flirted with me. I was normally able to shake off that type of thing, but the guy just looked really creepy for some reason. There was something about his stare and the comments he made under his breath, and while I was pretty sure he was going for that whole five o'clock shadow, unshaven look, his facial hair was coming in blotchy at best. I shuddered at the memory.

Loading the groceries in the rain had gotten me just short of drenched, and when combined with the changing of the seasons, I started to shiver. I leaned over and turned the heat on low. It wasn't enough to warm me thoroughly, but I wasn't willing to sacrifice some of the cold groceries I had spent the night getting.

I had only gotten a couple of miles from the store when I heard an odd noise from under the hood that sounded anything but promising. My truck sounded like it was choking.

"Oh please, no," I pleaded with my ancient machine. "Don't do this to me."

My truck had other plans, though. It slowed as the noise got louder, followed by a loud pop before it stopped completely.

"No!" I wailed, my forehead hitting the steering wheel. "No, no, no!"

My faithful truck had finally bailed on me. I felt tears well in my eyes as I wondered why the thing had chosen this night to give up: the sky open as buckets of rain fell, not to mention it was late and I had over a hundred dollars worth of groceries ready to perish.

A few warm tears leaked and spilt down my face as I tried to figure out what in the world I would do. I had no money. Every penny I earned went to rent, groceries or school, and my parents could not afford to help. They had scraped to buy me this traitorous hunk of mental that had just forfeited.

I pushed the issue of money and vehicles back and focused on trying to save my food, and located my purse, and therefore my phone, through the endless amount of grocery bags and tears. My first thought was to call Emmett, but it was highly possible he was in bed and I didn't want to disturb Rosalie. When I had spoken to her last she was complaining of terrible heartburn that only allowed her to sleep in spurts.

Alice was spending the night with Jasper and while I knew they would come to my rescue if I asked, Jasper lived across town and I didn't want to bother them either.

There was only one person I knew who would drop everything to get here.

I scrolled through my contacts, found James' number, and pressed send.

"Hello?"

"Hey," my voice betrayed me and cracked.

"Bella? What's wrong?" he asked worriedly.

"My truck," I started but choked on a sob.

"What's wrong? Were you in an accident? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, but I think my truck is dead. It stopped on me and it's pouring and I don't have any money to fix it or replace it and I have tons of groceries and there was this creep clerk at the store and it's dark and I'm all by myself..." I was breaking down in front of him and while I knew I should've been embarrassed, strangely I wasn't. I realized then I felt absolutely comfortable around him, because he had proved how dedicated he was to me.

"Bella, calm down. Where are you?" his voice soothed me.

James POV

I tried to push back the searing anger that nipped at me at the mention of Bella's creepy store clerk as I rounded the final corner and began to approach where she was stopped. The street was not a busy one, but as I stopped, I went ahead and pulled out my portable police lights. I turned them on and placed them on the hood.

Shielding myself from the heavy rain as best I could with the hood of my jacket, I approached Bella's window and waited for her to crank the glass down.

"You alright?" I asked first, even though all I really wanted to know was a better description of the ignorant grocery store employee I would hunt down later.

"Yes," she answered unconvincingly.

I smiled at her attempt. "Tell me what happened."

"I don't know, really. It just made this loud noise and quit."

"Pop your hood," I instructed her before running around to the front of her truck.

I pulled the hood up and secured it, then leaned into the engine as I pretended to mull over what could have caused the problem. My back was getting soaked as I stalled, but it didn't bother me; it would only add to my heroism and self-sacrificing appeal once I had fixed the beast of a truck.

I had worried momentarily that she might not call Emmett instead of me when the thing stopped. If that had been the case I could only hope he didn't know anything about cars, because my tinkering would have been obvious and alerted him that someone had been purposely tampered with her car.

However, my worrying was needless, and I was more than pleased that I had been the one she called. Now I would claim my role as her personal hero.

After five minutes or so of clunking on various engine parts, I tightened the gasket I had loosened only forty-five minutes earlier and smiled to myself before I leaned around the hood. "Try it now," I yelled to Bella through her windows and the deafening rain.

I moved to hide behind the hood again as she started it in order to hide my victorious grin. The truck fired right up.

I didn't expect her reaction, but I welcomed it all the same. She leapt from the now running truck and ran around the open door to me, throwing her arms around me in a deathly tight embrace. It took me a second due to shock, but I wrapped my arms around her in return.

"Thank you so much," she said, her face buried in my jacket. I pulled back slightly so that I could see her face, which was now slick with rain. She didn't seem to notice as she smiled. "You are too good to me."

I smiled, overwhelmingly happy with the outcome of my plan as I answered her. "I would do anything for you; don't you know that by now?"

She nodded, and although I couldn't be certain, I thought tears mingled with the rain on her face. I leaned down and kissed her.

We were able to bring her groceries up to her apartment in only two trips. After the last trip she told me to help myself to the towels in the bathroom while she went to change.

After I washed the grease from my hands and toweled off, I noticed Bella's shower curtain was not pulled all the way over, exposing just a sliver of her bathtub. The slight unevenness irked my nerves and I reached over to grab the curtain and pull it shut, but froze in my tracks as my eyes caught something out of place.

I had seen the shampoo and body wash bottles that girls bought at the store. They were usually bright colors: pink, yellow, orange, etc. Not like the black bottle with white block lettering that peeked at me from behind the askew curtain.

I carefully eased the curtain open, so as not to rip it from the iron rod and risk having to make up an excuse for Bella.

My suspicions were confirmed. Men's shampoo.

I had to focus on my breathing as I shut the curtain as slowly as I had opened it. I didn't need an active imagination to know whose it was.

The stupid bastard was pushing me to my limits. Every time I thought we were finally moving away from him, he showed up in some other way. I took slow breaths to work through my temper; it would only help Edward were Bella to witness it again.

_Breathe in_.

It doesn't matter; it's just a shampoo bottle. He just left a shampoo bottle at his sister's apartment.

_Breathe out_.

I was going to fucking kill him. Who the hell leaves their shampoo as some kind of territorial marking?

_Breathe in_.

Bella was just outside the door. I could hear her feathery steps sound down the hall and into the kitchen. I focused on them to calm myself, knowing that she would be at the door once she saw I was not in the living or dining area.

_Breathe out_.

I stepped out of the bathroom just in time to see her glancing into the kitchen for me.

"Back here," I called out.

She jumped slightly before turning around, and then smiled. "Hey. Find everything you need?" she asked sweetly as she moved to open one of her grocery bags that sat on the dining room table.

"Yes," I answered, silently adding the 'and then some.'

I moved next to her quietly and began removing the items from another bag. "Would you like some help?" I asked.

She blushed slightly before shaking her head. "That's alright, I kind of have a particular place for everything…" she trailed off looking apologetic.

"I see," I said, understanding more than she knew. "I am that way about certain things," I admitted, giving her an understanding wink. She smiled before turning to put her groceries in their place.

"Like what?" she asked with her face buried in the fridge.

I started removing all of the items from the other bags in an attempt to make things easier on her.

"Well, cases at work, in particular," I said. "I have to have things in a particular order, and I am very thorough." If only she knew.

"I could see that about you," she said with a smirk as she grabbed a few more items from the table.

"Ah. So you think you know me, eh?" I asked teasingly.

"I know you enough to know that you are someone who dedicates yourself to whatever you are invested in. That would seem to go hand-in-hand with being organized and 'thorough.'"

Taking the last few items out of the last bag, I gathered the empty bags in one hand and made my way toward her as I chuckled. "See, I knew you were too smart for college," I said as I leaned forward and kissed her forehead. She slapped at my arm playfully.

"You know who needs to go _back_ to college is the worthless weatherman. He promised me clear skies all evening or I wouldn't have gone out tonight."

I saw an opening for the question that had been bubbling beneath the surface all night. "Yeah, you had quite a night thanks to him," I agreed causally. "Even got ogled by store clerks." I forced a small smile.

"Ugh," she rolled her eyes. "He was harmless, really, but so gross. His facial hair was very poorly grown in and he didn't even try to hide his staring." She put the last item away and wiped her forehead with the back of her hand.

That should narrow him down enough. I fought the urge to pop my knuckles in anticipation.

I bit my cheek to keep myself in check as I walked to her and pulled her in my arms. "Maybe you should take me shopping with you from now on. I promise to keep all the prepubescent boys away."

She smiled and hummed "Mmkay."

A few hours later after she had fell asleep peacefully against me on the couch, I eased from under her weight and made my way to her room. I had two missions to accomplish tonight and not a second to spare.

*

It was two o'clock in the morning when a gangly teen with an orange clerk vest and more skin than hair on his cheeks walked out. He looked to be in no rush to get to his small, dented car that looked to be missing a big knob on the back to wind it up.

I almost laughed out loud at the little shit, wondering how in the world he thought he was even close to being good enough for my Bella. I'd teach him; he would learn the hard way that staring at beautiful, taken girls who were way out of his league would not fly.

As he got in his shitty car and took off, I followed him. I began to realize he was heading toward the dorms and cursed under my breath, knowing it would be harder to conceal my identity among the crowded buildings. I would have to make sure to catch him in the parking lot and hope that it would be empty in the early hours of the morning.

As he turned into a back lot on the outskirts of the school's campus, I slowed and pulled against a curb, finding a dark corner under a tree not far from where he was shutting off his car. I looked around and felt satisfied that my car was out of sight for the most part. I didn't want any potential witnesses to remember seeing an unmarked police car close by.

Pulling on a black toboggan in a half-assed attempt hide at least one of my features, I quietly eased open my door and ducked out of my own vehicle before taking a quick moment to look around. I wanted to be very cautious; college students were not known for making an early night of things.

The only movement within a good thirty yards or so was the idiot clerk as he climbed out of his car. Still hunched slightly, I made my way quickly to him. Even with my tall frame I could move quietly and stealthily.

The fucker would have no clue what hit him.

I came up on him from behind and in one swift motion had him spun around and accepting a right-hook in the gut. He folded pathetically as his air left him, as I knew he would, and I followed the punch by grabbing his head by his greasy hair in order to help it meet my knee. That was all it took for him to go down like a bitch, and I laughed darkly at him and he laid in the fetal position at my feet.

At my mercy.

I leaned down, propping my hands on my knees as I bent close to him.

"Listen here, fuck face. Stare inappropriately at my girl again, or any girl for that matter, and it'll be the last fucking thing you do. Understand?"

When he didn't respond, only quivered with fear, I shook my head at him disappointedly. "I asked you a question," I told at him as I straightened and shifted my weight.

After another few seconds of silence, I reared back and kicked him in the ribs. Hard. Twice for emphasis.

He coughed and moaned at the same time.

"I said, do you _fucking_ understand?"

That time he nodded weakly.

"Good," I smirked as I watched the pitiable kid writhe helplessly on the pavement. Guys like him disgusted me; he was not even man enough to attempt to fight back, or at least defend himself. All he had was the nerve to make pretty girls feel uneasy.

Well not anymore.

I took one last repulsed look at him as I spat in his face and stalked off.

Bella POV

In a good mood due to my recent acquiring of numerous edible goods, I rose early the next morning ready for a big breakfast and even began planning my dinner for that night. I decided I would invite James over as a thank you for coming to my rescue the night before.

Humming as I made my meal, I didn't notice Alice and Jasper had returned from his house until I came out to see them both at the dining room table expectantly.

They met my eyes with pleading looks, silently begging for a breakfast invite, and I couldn't find it in me even to pretend to be offended by the fact they assumed I would feed them.

"There's plenty in the kitchen," I said. I always cooked too much, and I half expected Alice to arrive in time to eat anyway.

"You're the best, Bells," Jasper said as he made his way past me to make a plate with Alice on his heels.

"Yeah, yeah," I muttered, although smiling.

"I see you went to the store," Alice commented after they rejoined me a couple minutes later.

"Yeah. It was miserable. The weather was supposed to clear out but it didn't, and then my truck broke down."

"I told you that thing was on its last leg," she said, at which Jasper nodded in agreement. "So, how did you get home?"

"I called James and he came out. He fixed my truck and it's running fine again," I said, trying not to sound _too_ haughty.

"Oh, he was able to fix it?"

"MmmHmm," I confirmed happily.

"Well isn't he handy?" Alice smirked.

After cleaning up my mess from breakfast, I realized I was growing short on time before I had to be at work and started to make my way towards my room. As I passed through the living room, I noticed Alice and Jasper sitting somewhat slack jawed as they watched TV.

I turned to the television set to see what had their attention and noticed a news crew stationed in on the university's campus as a reporter spoke.

"Police say the victim was 20-year-old Chris Timmons, who was returning from a late shift at Albertson's," the woman reporter explained before his picture popped up on the screen.

"Oh my god! He is in my Psych Research class!" Alice exclaimed. It was then that my mind slowly placed where I knew him from.

"Timmons suffered three broken ribs, a broken nose and is in stable condition at Virginia Masen Hospital. Police are advising students to be extra cautious around campus until they can find the perpetrator, but say they have no leads at this time."

I stared ahead blankly as the woman wrapped up her report. "I saw him last night at the store," I whispered, mostly to myself.

It was somewhat disturbing to think that I had seen the guy only hours before he was beaten within a breath of his life. While he had made my skin crawl, no one deserved that. "I hope they find whoever did it."

Alice and Jasper nodded in agreement.

Blowing out a heavy breath of disbelief that puffed out my cheeks, I turned to go back to my room. I quickly grabbed clothes and then headed for the shower.

As I bathed, I found myself aggravated that I was unable to keep my eyes off the stupid bottle of shampoo that sat in the corner. It was like salt in a wound, reminding me that I had not spoken to Edward in over a week. It only made me stare at it harder.

I had briefly considered allowing myself to open it and surround myself with his smell again. The only thing that kept me from doing just that was that I knew it would be missing that key ingredient he added and would ultimately not be fulfilling. Similar to our relationship over the phone.

Proud of myself for resisting the alluring smell once again, I exited the shower and headed back to my room to dress. As I quickly pulled on jeans and a t-shirt and settled for towel drying my hair, I moved to the desk to grab my phone, but noticed something that stopped me in my tracks.

I blinked, making sure I was seeing correctly. After four or five attempts to change what I saw, it remained.

My fish was floating lifeless in his bowl.

**Yeah, I know. You hate me and want to know where in the fuck E is. I promise he comes to the rescue soon, but for the sake of my faulty storyline we had to allow James and Bella to progress just a little bit. I mean, who doesn't want to see a lil bit of jealous Edward? ;)**

**Also, I claim no knowledge of car parts, so if you really can loosen a gasket to make one stop working, it is pure luck, cuz I totally just made it up. This chap is dedicated to my piece of crap vehicle which really did quit on me last week. I luckily had no attachments to it whatsoever… so good ridden to that junk. It was the lemons of all lemons, no not the kinda lemons I dig. (sry, another bad joke…) I seriously considered just beating it with a baseball bat in a very James-like manner, but ultimately decided to do the right thing and donate it to Goodwill. And get a kickass tax credit. **

**Sorry for that little rant. **

**Soooo… want to know what ya should be reading while waiting on my pokey ass? Well I'll tell ya!**

**Breaking Bella by sixeightshuffle**

**Clipped Wings and Inked Armor by hunterhunting**

**All Work and No Play by herinfiniteeyes**

**Do all that after you leave me a review and tell me if James is making yer skin is crawl yet.**


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight.**

**A/N: Alright, major thanks to my beta- herinfiniteeyes. I read a fic over the weekend that was written in a different tense and this chapter was a big time pain in the ass for her because of it. I seriously made her job tons more difficult that it shoulda been, but she did it anyway cuz she ROCKS HARD.**

**Oh, and you guys crack me with the fish sympathy. You all were way more upset about the fish dying than you were about some poor kid getting his ass beat for a lil bit of staring, lol.**

**Warning****: James here is about to reminisce about the death of said fish. He is sick and demented, as you are aware, so if you think it will bother you just pick up where Bella starts, or don't read the part in italics. You will not miss anything plot wise, but I got a lot of questions about what was done to P, so here ya go.**

James POV

Sitting idly at work, I grinned at the slight swelling and ache in my hand, slowly stretching my fingers out before pulling them back into a fist. The pain was welcome, refreshing the memory of the greasy face that had caused it, the face that was now broken.

The station was busy in action around me. There had been a hit and run this morning and the pedestrian victim was not expected to live, throwing the search for the perp into high priority.

A few of my clueless co-workers were even looking for me, though they didn't know it. The circus my on-campus attack started had dominoed, with students and parents alike calling in and demanding to know who had done this terrible thing and wanting him behind bars.

I held back a snort.

Teaching an ignorant prick a lesson on the proper treatment of women was hardly terrible. I could think of numerous things more terrible. Even killing the stupid fish was probably worse in society's eyes than giving the testosterone-deficit kid a couple of licks.

Worse maybe, but still enjoyable.

_I eased out from underneath Bella's limp body without a problem as she seemed to sleep similar to a coma patient. I quickened my pace to her bedroom, having trouble ignoring the bathroom and the contents the shower held while walking past. Removing the shampoo would be too noticeable; I would have to settle for the fish._

_In the doorway of Bella's room, I paused to let my eyes adjust to the darkness. I didn't want to turn on the overhead light, something about it made everything seem too easy. Instead, I stalked across the room and flicked on the desk lamp, conveniently located next to my victim's bowl._

_It was almost humorous, killing a fish in the name of your girl, but it didn't make it unnecessary. I was more than ready to sever this endless tie she kept with Cullen, and even though the shampoo remained, I had time to consider options for it as well._

_The orange fish seemed to be asleep, if fish even slept; it was nestled against the plastic tree along the bottom rocks. I raised my hand and lowered it into the bowl, keeping an even pace and taking my time. The fish didn't stir at first, but as soon as it was alerted to the intrusion it swam frantically - right into my waiting hand. _

_Clutching the creature, I lifted it from the water and almost in a mocking way, laid it with ease onto an open area on Bella's meticulously neat desk. I swatted so that I was eye level, and watched with a slight smile as it flopped, desperately searching for water. My fascination was peaked, watching it fight for life. Knowing its ill fate was brought by my hands gave me a strange sense of a God complex. _

_When the energy to flop fleeted, the fish lay still, and I looked it in the eye as his mouth opened and closed hopelessly, drawing in its last few breathes of the air that killed it._

_Poking the carcass to ensure the completion of its death and being satisfied, I picked up the dead fish and dropped it back into its bowl. It floated lifelessly, the sight making my smile widen. I used the hem of my shirt to clean up the few droplets of water from the scene of the crime and made my way out the bedroom door._

The whole thing didn't last nearly as long as I would have liked for it to, but it was therapeutic and I left not even worried about the shampoo.

*

Bella POV

My teeth gnawed harshly on my lower lip while I stared at my phone in my hands, Edward's name and number highlighted. When the light flickered out due to my stalling I pressed a button to make it light up again.

I had been attempting this call for two days.

The mental debate on whether or not to call Edward and tell him about the fish was driving me crazy. I felt like such a failure. I couldn't figure out what I had done wrong. Even though Alice and Jasper assured me that fish were fickle pets and I did everything right, I still couldn't stand the fact I couldn't do something as simple as keeping a stupid fish alive. The poor thing hadn't even lasted four weeks.

I looked at the clock and tried to do the London time calculation again. It was useless. He very well could have been in Florida anyway, so it didn't really matter.

I was also hesitant to call him because he had not called me in so long. Was he mad about my accusations of him calling purposely during my date? What if he decided that he didn't want to keep up our telephonic friendship? My calling to tell him I killed his fish would not be the way to improve upon that.

Sighing loudly, I finally pressed send and decided to stop over thinking everything.

I was torn between relief and disappointment when his voicemail picked up. As his recorded voice crooned in my ear, I half forgot what I had even called for by the time I'd heard the beep.

"Hey, Edward. It's Bella. I, uh…" Should I leave it in the message? That didn't seem right. Of course it wasn't like a relative had died; it was just a fish. "Um, just give me a call whenever you get this," I finally said quickly before snapping the phone shut, and then pressing it against my forehead.

The message made me feel somewhat lighter, despite the nagging fact that I had called him when he seemed to be avoiding me.

I stood and tossed my phone on the bed and drug my feet sullenly as I made my way from my room to the living room. I found Alice perched on the couch and the coffee table covered in varying shades of nail polish. Her feet were perched on the edge with foam separating her glossy wet toes. She looked up as I entered.

"Did you finally call him?" she asked.

I nodded and slumped into the couch next to her and let my eyes shut. "I left a voicemail."

She acknowledged this only momentarily before changing the subject abruptly. "Look at those bare toes! Give them here."

I rolled my head lazily in her direction and looked at her with one eyebrow arched.

"Just give 'em here, Bella. You know I'll win."

I sighed, well, more like huffed. "Fine, but I get the final say on the color. Nothing crazy."

"Yeah, whatever. Gimme!" she made a grabbing motion with her hands toward my feet. I swung them up on the couch and into her lap and let my head fall into the pillow on the other end. "You know, you have got to be the only girl I know who would turn down a pedi," she shook her head and she turned to comb through her color selection.

"It's not like anyone will see them," I reminded her.

"Well we could always dress them up with some open toe pumps," she said with a grin.

Choosing to ignore her, I said, "Can't you rope Jasper into this instead? Don't girls usually con their boyfriends into playing dress-up?"

She was still trying to find a color out of what must have been at least forty shades. "I do," she grabbed a bottle from the table and held it out for me. "This is my favorite on him." I snatched it and examined the label.

"Lagoon?" I asked, reading the color name.

"Yep, matches his eyes," she answers simply.

Replacing the bottle on the table, I snorted as I realized that this meant Jasper had actually allowed Alice to paint his nails at some point. Jasper, the guy I watched graduate from the Air Force.

"Dressing up girlfriends is more fun, though," she admitted. "Here we go!" Alice clutched a bottle in her hand and held it up for my approval in a Vera White fashion. "Blood Red," she told me. "This way your toes will match the shade your face turns every five to ten minutes."

As much as I wanted to argue the fact or act offended, said face lit up on cue. I hadn't realized I did it so often, or that it was that noticeable.

Alice smiled victoriously as she started placing foam spacers between my toes.

*

I checked on my pot roast that had simmered in my crock-pot for most of the day, decided it was done, and turned it to the "keep warm" option. Emmett, Rose, Jasper and James were all expected to arrive for dinner in thirty minutes and surprisingly everything was in order.

I turned back to the cookie dough batter that was still in the early stages and stirred in more flour to thicken it up. When it finally hit the right consistency I added in chocolate and peanut butter chips, Rosalie's favorite. While she didn't normally allow such fattening treats, she had always made an exception for these cookies, and I wanted to celebrate her victory over morning sickness.

Later as I placed large portions of food strategically on the small table, Jasper arrived with James following him by only minutes. I glanced at the clock and began to worry just a bit when I realized Emmett and Rosalie weren't going to show early; it wasn't like Emmett to be late to dinner.

Seeming to come from nowhere, James wrapped his arms around my waist from behind me. "This smells amazing," he whispered into my ear, his nose buried in my hair. I smiled and thanked him just as Emmett arrived, without knocking.

"Damn, Bells! It smells fucking _good_ in here!" he said as he spotted me.

"Em! Language!" Rosalie rolled her eyes as she entered behind him. "Our child is going to cuss like a sailor," she muttered under her breath before stopping in her tracks. "Bellaaaa," she drawled as she turned to me. "Do I smell choco-butter cookies?"

I smiled and nodded.

"God, I could kiss you right now… except… you have something all over your back," she winked at James, who snickered in my ear.

"What's the hold up? Is everything ready?" Emmett asked and pulled out a chair to sit before I answered.

"Yeah, it's ready," I said, wiggling from James' arms to remove my apron.

"Good, I'm fucking starving," Emmett said as he eyed the options on the table. I laughed and Rosalie rolled her eyes again.

"First word is going to be 'fuck,'" she shook her head.

Dinner proceeded nicely, despite Emmett's language and Rosalie's chiding, and Alice and Jasper's whispered conversations. They only looked up when Emmett brought up the assault on campus from a couple of days ago.

"Do you know anything else about that U Dub kid?" he asked, eyeing James.

James shifted ever so slightly. "No. I'm not working it, but from what I hear they still have no leads. The kid said it happened so fast he didn't get any kind of look at the guy."

"No shit," Emmett said, only milliseconds before his next bite occupied his mouth.

"Actually, I am working on this new case that-"

James was interrupted by the door clicking open, which caused all of us to still and look toward it. Alice hardly ever had anyone over, and everyone I knew was sitting at the table. It wasn't until I caught a glimpse of cinnamon-highlighted hair that I realized who it was.

My heart dropped, somewhere in the vicinity of my stomach.

Edward.

When his eyes took in the scene his jaw slackened slightly and no one said a word for what seemed like ages, although it surely couldn't have been more than a couple of seconds.

Alice jumped out of her chair and threw herself at her brother. "Oh my god! Why didn't you tell me you were coming back so soon?"

My brain, in its half-functioning glory, attempted to do math on how long he had been gone. I knew it had not been the full five weeks, but the days jumbled together in my head and I just gave up.

He looked amazing, better than anything my memory had cooked up over the last… how ever many days. He wore crinkled slacks and a matching non-ironed button down, sans tie, with what had to have been two-day-old stubble. My heart lurched back up into my chest cavity in order to pound on it from the inside.

He hugged Alice back and apologized to her softly before looking back up. "Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. I'll just go get a drink and come back later." His eyes met mine for a flash before darting away.

Alice scoffed. "Don't be ridiculous, Edward." She skipped to the hall closet and pulled out a folding chair, placing it between her and Emmett, putting him directly across from me. "Bella made plenty of food."

He stood awkwardly and thought it out before turning to Alice. "Really, Alice, I'm fine. I can just run down the street so I don't inter-"

"Sit," Alice ordered.

Edward glanced around the table. "Sure you guys don't mind?"

"Of course not, dude!" Emmett answered for everyone and patted the back of the aluminum chair next to him.

"So what happened? Why are you back early?" Alice asked as she took her seat again and stared expectantly at him until he finally sat.

"Things in Paris went longer than expected, so they sent someone else to Miami," he explained briefly.

Realizing he needed a plate, I stood silently and went into the kitchen to get him one. When I returned, I walked over to where he sat and placed it in front of him. He looked up and finally _looked_ at me, his grassy green eyes holding mine.

"Thanks," he said, his voice low and soft, and it was all I could do to nod and walk back to my seat.

As I walked away, I internally cursed myself when I remembered the haphazard way I had thrown my hair up before cooking all day. Now wispy pieces were falling sloppily in my face, surely making me look horrid.

I chanced a look at James for the first time since Edward's arrival, and although his face was smooth, his hands gripped the sides of his chair so tightly that the white of his knucklebones were visible through the skin. I reached over and patted his leg in an effort to ease him, but instead I felt his taut thigh muscles that did not react to my touch.

I had no idea that Edward bothered him _that_ much.

At Alice's insistence, Edward spoke for the majority of the remainder of dinner, answering all her questions about Paris and work. I was torn between hanging on his every word and trying to keep James tethered to his seat.

James never said another word, even when Emmett and Rosalie said goodbye to him as they left with Rosalie clutching her Tupperware full of cookies. He answered with a tight nod instead. As the night wore on, I could tell James was reluctant to go, but when he noticed the late hour, he made himself leave as he tugged me toward the door.

Standing at the door but still in view of Alice, Jasper and Edward, James gripped my face and pulled my mouth to his, covering mine in a heated kiss. I knew what he was doing and who he was doing it for, and even though it made me highly uncomfortable to participate in something like that in front of anyone, much less Edward, I played along. The night had been rough enough not to allow him this.

He pulled his face from mine abruptly. "Hey, I'm not ready to call it a night just yet. Why don't we go for a walk or something?" he asked, searching my face.

I bit my lip. "I've got class in the morning," I told him, my voice apologetic.

He nodded understandingly, kissing me hard on the mouth again before turning and stalking out the door.

Blowing out a breath of what could only be relief, I turned around and looked at my friends, all of whom had straight faces. "What?" I asked.

Jasper and Alice shook their heads feigning ignorance and they stepped away to say their own goodbyes, but Edward stood still. I watched him carefully as I walked past him back to the kitchen to clean up, but his carefully constructed mask never changed.

*

Alice insisted that we all watch a movie together, stating that was what she always did when Edward first came back into town. She threw on some chick flick and jumped to the middle of the couch, patting the cushions on either side of her.

"Now you are part of the tradition," she said to me as I sat on her left and Edward lowered himself more gracefully on her right.

I gave her a half-hearted smile and turned to the television, trying to follow the movie. Even though he wasn't even in my peripheral vision, I couldn't concentrate. My mind flitted back and forth between how good it felt to see him again to worrying about the waves of tension that practically rolled off James during dinner. If Edward was staying long, we were all in trouble.

Half way through the movie, Alice turned to me and announced just a notch louder than necessary, "I can't stay awake any longer. I'm going to bed."

I wanted to roll my eyes at her attempt to give me and her brother privacy, which I wasn't sure I wanted anyway, and pulled my feet up as she walked past me and headed for her room. I kept my feet up and curled them to my side before laying my head down on the arm of the couch. When I heard Alice's door click shut, the air in the room seemed to thicken, causing my throat to dry and making my mouth feel sticky.

I saw Edward turn toward me but pretended I didn't, waiting for him to talk.

After at least a full minute of undergoing his stare, he finally said, "Sorry I missed your call."

I turned my head slightly so I could see him without lifting it from the couch. "It's okay," I told him.

"What did you need?"

My heart quickened and I slowly sat myself up. "Well, I kind of had some… unfortunate news."

His eyebrows furrowed as he waited for me to elaborate.

"First, you should know that I did everything I could. I really tried," I explained, my eyes pleading.

His eyebrows furrowed harder.

"I killed your fish," I whispered, lowering my eyes to the couch. When I was met with seconds of agonizing silence, I finally looked up to study his face. I didn't know what I expected: sadness, anger, resentment… but instead, the right corner of his mouth was pulled up slightly into an amused grin.

"It's not funny," I tried to say, but a slight smile broke through. "I kept his bowl clean and fed him everyday. I even moved around his little tree so that he wouldn't get bored with the same scenery."

He laughed out loud at that, and I pouted. "I tried really hard to keep that thing alive."

Noticing my put-out tone, he sobered himself quickly and scooted down the couch, bringing himself a few inches closer to me.

"I can get you another fish," he offered.

I shrugged. "I don't know," I said as I laid my head back down on the arm of the couch. Taking my cue that the conversation was over, he turned so that he was facing the television again without moving back to his original spot.

After several minutes of silence, I blurted out, "You forgot your shampoo."

When he took a minute to respond, I imagined his eyebrows angling as they had earlier, and the way his face seemed younger somehow when he was confused.

"Oh," he said finally.

"I kept it," I told him, then snapped my mouth shut to keep further useless information from escaping.

"Thanks," I heard him say before the silence stretched out again.

*

A loud announcer from what I guessed was an annoying commercial pulled me from my slumber and I shook my head groggily, realizing I had fallen asleep. It wasn't until I pulled myself up into a sitting position that I discovered that in my sleep, I had stretched out and had my feet on Edward's lap – and that he had been resting his arm across them.

"Sorry," I said, my voice somewhat thick. My ankles actually ached at the loss of his arm's weight.

"It's okay," he said with a smile playing at his lips. "I like your toenail polish," he added, his grin turning impish.

"Thanks," I said, and because I was unable _not_ to say stupid and useless stuff around him, I added, "Alice did them. She said the color matched my face." To prove her point, my face heated at my inability just to leave it with 'thanks.'

I glanced at him only long enough to catch his grin, crooked as ever.

"I better get to bed," I said, standing and stretching. "Goodnight, Edward."

He gave me a slight wave before he stretched out on the couch. "Goodnight, Bella."

**YAY, Edward is back! Finally, right? Only thing is, James will totes not be digging this, so he is gearing up for a showdown. Awww, snap ;) (yeah, I know I'm retarded, just ignore me)**

**Reviews are better than choco-butter cookies and a stubbly Edward. (welllll, maybe not the last one)**


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: I own nada in the Twilight universe, people.**

**A/N: So you can all thank my beta, hereinfiniteeyes, for this one. She badgered me for days with all cap messaging until I finally finished this sucker, then beta'd it overnight for me, cuz she is a pushy, awesome and schmexy lady.**

I overslept the next morning. Edward had haunted my dreams the entire night, which caused me to wake up numerous times and shift uncomfortably in my bed. I kicked at my covers and flipped and flopped, but nothing settled me. When I would try to close my eyes to fall back asleep I would see his face, remembering how it had looked as I cleaned his eyebrow after I had hit him with the front door, right when his eyes would dart to my lips. The next time I would remember being sandwiched between him and the wall while he kissed me, my entire body on fire.

When my alarm clock went off I got up and walked sluggishly into my bathroom to get ready for work only to be assaulted by Edward's scent. He had showered already and the heady smell of him and his shampoo hung thick in the air. I tried my best to ignore it as I bathed, but even when I scrubbed my own shampoo into my hair, the scent just mingled with Edward's.

After my shower, I threw on my bathrobe and opened the door of the restroom to allow the aromas to escape and dissipate into the hall. I picked up a bottle of hair treatment that Alice had brought home for me, poured some in my hand and then smoothed it into my hair. Evidently hair my length needed extra nutrition and care, and this product did the trick. I rubbed it in for the second day in a row and wondered how long it would be before I saw the promised effect.

Picking up my comb I started yanking it through my hair. I cursed my stubborn reluctance to cut it even though I hated the hassle it created. About halfway through the battle, Edward appeared behind me in the mirror.

I started, at which he grinned. He was dressed for work as usual, but minus the jacket and his sleeves rolled up a few inches. It was weird how something like forearms made my heart go from startled to erratic.

"Sorry, just need to grab my watch," he explained, sliding between me and the back wall of the bathroom, his body brushing against mine just barely. I suppressed a shudder. He reached to pick up the hand towel that had fallen from its hook and grabbed his watch from beneath it.

I took a deep breath and started combing again. "It's alright," I managed as he stood next to me latching his watch. A knot in my hair caused me to growl.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing. I'm just sick of my hair," I huffed, letting my annoyance at my hair distract me from him being so close.

He smirked and leaned close to me as I watched his reflection with my eyes growing wide. "Well, I think it's beautiful," he said softly before resting a hand on my shoulder as he slid back past me and out of the bathroom.

I couldn't stop the shudder that time. I just prayed that he missed it.

*

After a busy day at the library I was looking forward to spending the evening with James. Edward's presence in the apartment was honestly welcome, but it frayed my nerves endlessly. At least when I was with James things were easy.

I fumbled my phone out of my purse and scrolled to his number before pressing send.

"Warren," he answered with his last name, which I had come to realize meant he was on duty.

"Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't know you were working," I apologized.

He huffed loudly. "I'm not supposed to be, but we had a deceased Jane Doe show up on our shift this morning and now Jenkins and I are the leads. It's obviously a homicide and the media is up our ass about it. You have no idea how much I hate to do this, but we are going to have to reschedule our date. And I don't even know when, because this kind of shit takes days, especially when you figure in the paperwork." He was practically seething by the time he finished. He must have let the case really get to him.

"Don't worry about the date," I tried to calm him. "We can go out anytime. Just call me when you can and we will figure it out later."

His voice was steadier when he spoke again. "Alright. I'll call you tomorrow."

*

Sunday was normally my day off. I rarely worked on Sundays, and I usually tried to have my homework completed so I had the day to myself. Alice made herself sparse as well, typically spending the day with Jasper. Last week she had gone out shopping with Rosalie.

This Sunday, however, was different. Edward was home.

I sat in my bed and chewed my lip, trying to decide if I should hide in my room all day. Spending the day lounging in the living room with him seemed wonderful and terrifying at the same time. I seriously doubted Alice had decided to stay at home in order to ease the tension; she obviously found the whole situation somewhat humorous.

Putting on a brave face, I trotted out of my room, down the hall and ducked into the bathroom. I stalled in there for almost an hour getting ready before I knew I would have to face my fears. If I was going to live with Edward for possibly another few weeks, I would have to get over being so nervous around him.

He was sitting with the paper and coffee again, as he often had every morning when he was here the last time. Even though he was gone more than he was here, it just felt right for him to be there, doing that particular thing. It seemed natural, like the ways things should be.

"Morning," I said as I walked by heading towards the kitchen.

He turned and smiled before saying, "Good morning."

In the kitchen I made myself a bowl of cereal and noticed the cabinets were practically empty. I peeked in the fridge for the milk, only to see it mostly barren as well. I moaned pathetically as I realized I would have to go grocery shopping today.

I walked back into the living room.

"Is Alice at Jasper's?" I asked, holding my bowl with one hand as I spooned a bite with the other.

"I believe so," he said, folding his paper and putting it down, revealing his casual jeans and t-shirt attire.

"Oh. Well, I hate to be a bad hostess, but I have to make a run to the grocery store," I told him. "I'll see you later?"

He studied me for a minute, making me shift a little as I wondered what was running through his mind. "Maybe I'll go with you," he finally said. He stood and grabbed his cup from the table and headed toward the kitchen. I followed him.

"Oh, that's okay. I'll be fine by myself," I told him as James' offer to go with me only days ago came fresh into memory. If he found out that not only was I going without him, but taking Edward… well, I could only imagine he would absolutely flip out.

"But I want to go. I haven't done anything as simple as grocery shopping… ever."

I bit my lip as I thought. I hated going by myself anyway, creepy bagger or no. James didn't have to know that Edward went along. Besides, Edward was my friend, I reasoned.

"I promise I won't ruin any rituals or anything," he offered with a smirk.

"Fine," I said before sighing. I turned to grab my keys off the counter but his hand came over mine. The contact made my air come in much quicker, shallower breaths. I turned my head slowly over my shoulder to meet his gaze. His hand never moved.

"I'll drive," he stated simply.

As we walked out into the parking lot he scowled at my truck in passing. "How do you get groceries in that thing anyway? What do you do if it rains?"

"You don't want to know," I said under my breath. "Stop picking on my truck. Why does everyone dislike it so much, anyway?" I looked around for his car but didn't see it.

"Probably because you need something a little more reliable," he replied as he lightly put his hand on the small of back to guide me in the direction of his car. Heat spread from the spot and I fought back the urge to walk closer to him.

"It _is_ reliable. They don't build them like that anymore," I said with a pout.

He didn't answer as we came up to a silver Volvo, dropping his hand before unlocking the passenger side door.

"Where is your other car?" I asked, remembering the last one was black.

"It was a rental," he answered, opening the door for me and waiting for me to step in.

I folded myself into the vehicle. "Is this a rental too?" I asked, looking up at him.

"No," he said with a smirk. He closed my door and walked around quickly to climb into his seat. "This is mine," he said, obviously extremely pleased about that fact.

"Then, why did you have a rental the last time, if you already had a car?" I asked, confused as to why he would use a rental one time and not the other.

"I wasn't going to be in that long last time so I didn't want to go through the hassle of getting it in and out of storage," he said. He threw the car in reverse and placed his right hand on the back of my headrest as he turned to watch as he backed out.

I internally lectured my heart for beating so fast over the possibility of him staying for an extended amount of time.

"So, you are in for how long, this time, then?" I stuttered and swallowed.

He put the car into drive and pulled out of the parking lot before looking over at me with a knowing smile. "I don't know, exactly, but probably for a while." He paused to make a turn. "I don't have anything on my calendar until after Thanksgiving, but that doesn't mean something won't come up between now and then."

_Thanksgiving?_

I nodded as casually as I could manage while trying to talk my heart out of its arrhythmia.

*

It felt odd to be grocery shopping with him. I knew that his whole reason for going was to do something "normal," but he didn't fit into that category no matter what way you cut it. He was too non-ordinary to be in such an ordinary setting. He had even insisted on pushing the cart, which I didn't mind because it left my hands free to inspect and comb through food.

I eyed a bunch of bananas and considered making some sort of dessert with them. "Do you like bananas?" I asked, even though the thought of someone not liking them seemed weird.

He smiled. "I like everything," he stressed the last word.

"I hardly believe that," I said, putting a group of eight bananas in his cart and moving forward through the other fruit.

"Try me," he taunted.

"What about sushi?" I couldn't keep my obvious disgust for the food out of my voice.

"Sure."

My face scrunched up which elicited a small laugh from him. "I draw the line at raw fish," I told him.

"Have you even tried it?"

"No, and I have no plans to," I said very matter-of-factly. "I am pretty open about food, but fish should be cooked. It's just wrong any other way."

He shook his head. "I'll have to get you to try it, right after your flying lessons."

I stopped and turned towards him. I had forgotten he wanted to take me up in a plane to try to get over my fear of heights. "I'll be doing neither of those," I informed him with a shaky voice.

"We'll see," he said back as he pushed forward.

I bit my tongue, deciding that even if he was completely wrong there was no point in trying to prove my point now. Instead I followed him and placed items in the cart.

In the next aisle he stood patiently behind me as I searched through cans of cream before picking one up.

"What do you need cream for?" he asked, watching me add it to my other items.

"For Alfredo sauce," I told him as I continued to peruse the aisle.

"But," he said, and I turned around. "They have it already made," he held up a jar of premixed Alfredo in his hand. "Much more convenient."

I walked over to him, snatched it playfully from his hands and narrowed my eyes. "Mine sauce is _way_ better than this jarred junk," I told him, punctuating each word by pointing the jar at him.

He held his hands up in surrender. "Whatever you say. You're the cook."

"Glad we cleared that up," I said as I replaced the jar and turned to start walking forward again.

"Why aren't you going into culinary school?" he asked, eyeing me carefully. "You obviously take this cooking thing _way_ too seriously."

I only shrugged, deciding to ignore his mockery. "I thought about it, but I was worried it would be one of those things I wouldn't enjoy anymore if it became something I _had_ to do."

He nodded in understanding. "Yeah, that's kind of what happened with me. I made my hobby my job, and that makes you burn out on it really fast."

I picked up a box and pretended to read the label. "So are you not happy with it anymore?"

"I don't know. I still love what I do; it's exciting and fascinating, but it's very demanding. It takes up my entire life. I feel like everything I do revolves entirely around work now."

I sat the box down and turned to see his face. He looked wistful and pensive, as if he was only realizing this as he said it just now.

He shook the expression suddenly. "Oh well. It's not like I'm qualified to do anything else, anyway," he joked, but I saw something else behind it. "So are you making the infamous pasta tonight? Because I may have to judge this sauce you were boasting about."

"You know, if you want me to cook for you, all you have to do is ask… and admit that you like it," I smiled playfully.

"I wouldn't be so cocky if I were you. I have had _real_ Italian pasta – in Italy. You'll have to prove yourself," he teased back.

"I accept the challenge," I said with more confidence than I had. "But not tonight. I don't cook on Sundays."

*

After we had stored all the grocery goods, I had snuck back into my room to change and relax. As much as I found I really liked being around Edward, it was almost physically painful to be around him and not touch him. However, I was only released from the hum that accompanied him for about twenty minutes, when I heard him call my name from the living room.

I found him on the middle cushion of the couch, his hand patting the one next to him. When I sat down next to him, he reached for a small brown paper bag, with thin handles that were tied together with a yellow ribbon. I glanced from him to the bag and back again.

"Are you ready for your presents?" he asked.

"Presents?" I asked, my eyes wide. "For what?"

"Well, technically for keeping my fish. I mean, he lived way longer with you than he would have been able to with me."

"Edward, I-"

"But," he interrupted, "I would have gotten these anyway." He held the bag out for me. I stared at him, trying not to be ungrateful but not happy at the same time.

I finally took the bag, placed it in my lap and worked at the ribbon. When it opened I saw two paperback books inside and pulled them out.

"The first one," Edward said as I stared at the one on top, "Is a biography of Geoffrey Chaucer. It's actually the most popular one, so it isn't unique to London or anything, but it's very good. It covers quite a bit of his history and literary influences.

"The other one I found at this small shop in a forgotten alley. The owner was this older, brassy woman, and she was reluctant to sell it, but I charmed her into it," he boasted. I didn't doubt that was the absolute truth. I pulled the bottom book from beneath the other one and noticed it was in used condition: the pages were dog-eared and the binding was crinkled with bits of white showing through.

"'Long Lost Poems of Long Lost Poets,'" he recited the title as I looked it over. "I read through it on the way home. It's amazing."

I was at a loss for words. 'Thank you' wasn't enough, and even if it was I couldn't find my voice to say it. Instead, tears brimmed in my eyes and I blinked furiously hoping to hide them.

I looked up and smiled, which he returned. "I don't know what to say," I finally said, making my eyes water again.

"I also got you this," he said, his voice full of chagrin. He held out a small, tissue wrapped item in the palm of his hand. I took it carefully and started to peel away the paper. "I know it's super corny, but this was my view from my hotel for weeks and I couldn't pass it up."

Inside was a snow globe of Big Ben, only four inches in height. A small smile flitted across my lips, because it was corny. But it was also perfect.

"Can I ask you something?" I asked, my eyes avoiding him by focusing on the small treasure in my hand.

"Of course," he said.

"Why did you stop calling?"

He was silent for a moment, until I finally looked up at him from beneath my eyelashes. He blew out a large breath.

"I was worried I had offended you when I called during your date. I hadn't meant to interrupt your evening, and I figured you would appreciate some space."

"Oh," I said simply.

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

"Oh, no, that's ok. I just wanted to make sure you weren't mad at me. For, you know, accusing you of doing it on purpose," I said barely above a whisper before letting my eyes fall again. I shook the snow globe and studied each faux flake as it floated down.

"That wasn't my intent at all," he replied. "I like being your friend and I just didn't want to step over any boundaries."

At the moment, I was ready to throw all my boundaries and reasons out the window. I desperately wanted a reminder of the way his lips moved against mine and the way heat seemed to seep from anywhere he touched me. I closed my eyes and fought the images that came.

"So are we still friends?" he asked, forcing rational thought into me again.

"Of course," I said, then looked up at him. "I can't thank you enough, for all of this." I pulled the books away from where I had them clutched to my chest and then looked back up at him. "Do you mind if I sit out here and read for a bit?"

"Absolutely not," he assured me.

He pulled out a thick manila folder and started thumbing through papers that look work-related while I propped my feet on the coffee table and read the tattered book of poems. We stayed that way the rest of the day, eventually ordering take out as the day slipped into evening. When Alice came in after dark had settled to find us on the couch, each with our own reading material, she only smiled a somewhat victorious smile and said goodnight as she headed directly for her room.

**Sorry to all of you who have taken a liking to James and all his evil ways, but he will be back next chapter and making up for lost time, so don't worry. In the meantime I hope you enjoyed a little E/B progress.**

**Just in case you were wondering, the first book Edward bought was **_**Chaucer: His Life, His Works, His World**_** by Dr. Donald Howard. The second book was fictional, but I would love to believe something similar exists somewhere in the world. **

**Let me know what ya thought!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: SM still owns, not me. Life sucks like that.**

**A/N: So… yeah, I know, it is about friggin time, right? Well, this one was important to me, to get it right, because we are getting close to shit hitting the fan here, people. My beta also had computer fail for about week which caused more delays, but I promise it was worth it to your eyes for the wait ;)**

**Speaking of my lovely beta… isn't she lovely? Herinfiniteeyes is awesome as always.**

**Anyway, onward with the story!**

James' case kept him busy for a few days, and when he did find the time to call, he usually seemed stressed and tired. I felt awful that he was so spent on the case. I followed it in the news since he said he couldn't really relay any of it to me. Apparently he was looking for the killer of a 28-year-old woman who had been discovered dead in her apartment from numerous stab wounds. They had two suspects, both of whom were shockingly MIA.

I had kept myself busy without even trying; school and work were proving to be more demanding as the semester went on. However, I had found the time to make my special Alfredo sauce Monday evening. Edward had complimented it immensely but I knew it was a bit of an exaggeration. There was no way my self-taught cooking was on par with Italy's standards.

Tuesday evening I worked later than normal and came home to find Jasper, Alice and Edward with dinner ready. They all claimed to have had a hand in it in one way or another, which made me all the more reluctant to taste anything, but surprisingly everything was decent.

Wednesday night, Edward and I found ourselves alone in the apartment again. Instead of allowing the tense atmosphere to take over, we settled into the playful banter that we had found at the grocery store and fell back on thereafter.

When I spotted him on the couch working, his iPod lying on the coffee table, I plopped down next to him and grabbed it. "Do you mind?" I asked holding it up.

He gave me a slight smile and shook his head no, but instead of turning back to his work, he watched me.

I picked up the ear buds and started to put them in, but stopped to hold them up questioningly. "This doesn't, like, freak you out or anything, right?"

"Nah," he said.

"Alright," I said as I put them in. "I always ask now, because Jasper just _flips out_ if you put his in your ears." I laughed lightly at the memory; it had been years ago when Em and Rosalie were still dating.

Jasper and I were still young when Rosalie and Emmett met and started dating. I was still young enough that Emmett had to tote me around wherever he went while both of our parents were at work, so it meant I had spent a lot of time at Rosalie and Jasper's house. When Em and Rosalie disappeared somewhere in the house, I always had a way of finding Jasper – and annoying the hell out of him. Like any good adoptive little sister, I snooped through his stuff and asked multiple and pointless questions.

By the time I got into high school, Emmett had graduated and Jasper sort of stepped in as my big brother. With most of the guys already aware that Emmett was my brother, and with Jasper as his reinforcement, I only got the attention of the bravest guys at Forks High School.

To this day Jasper called me 'sis' more than not.

Edward went back to his sporadic typing while I pressed 'shuffle' and checked out all his albums.

It was moments like this, us sitting comfortably next to each other like it was the most natural thing in the world that made me berate myself and my stupid, logical decisions not to date him. I cursed the trait that made me responsible and reasonable, the one that led me away from what could have been something spectacular with Edward. It was always there beneath the surface with us, lying dormant.

At the same time, the part about me that guarded my adolescent heart and sheltered my love life until now knew better. I figured that the relationship we had was for the best, great even. I had made the right decision to keep it platonic.

Except for the small fact that my body betrayed me every few seconds while in his presence.

I shook my head in an attempt to stop the over-analyzing portion of my brain. I was too conscientious for my own good, and especially for my age. I went back to focusing on the abundant selection of music Edward had available.

Before one in particular caught my eye.

"Oh my god!" I shouted, my head falling back in a roar of laughter and pulling his iPod against my chest as I fell back into the couch.

"What?" Edward asked, his face drawn into confusion over what would make me laugh so hard.

"Y-you have… the Beastie Boys…" I was trying to talk, breathe and laugh hysterically at the same time, and it was not working.

"What is so funny about the Beastie Boys?" he asked.

"The fact that you have them on here," I howled.

He shot me a look of mock annoyance and held his hand open for device. "Come on. Give it back if you are just going to make fun."

I clutched it tighter to my chest and twisted my torso away from him. "No, I'm not done yet." I narrowed my eyes at him until he dropped his waiting hand before starting to scroll through his music again. He went back to studying his laptop screen.

I was finding all the usual suspects and nodding along unconsciously when there was a knock on the door, causing me to jerk my head toward it. I looked over at Edward who only shrugged one shoulder and turned back to his work. I shrugged as well, even though he wasn't paying attention, pulled out the ear buds, and tossed his iPod on the couch before hopping up to answer the door.

I pulled it open to find James, looking sleep deprived and in need of a good shave. As soon as his eyes traveled over me and took in my appearance, his jaw locked and his voice came out in a guttural growl.

"What the fuck are you wearing?" Each word came out calculated through his teeth.

My jaw slackened and I just stared at him, somewhat shocked and admittedly frightened by how easily his face had turned so… menacing. I looked down to see what I was wearing that had offended him so badly, but the outfit seemed innocent enough. After all, I had on shorts and a t-shirt. Dumbfounded, I looked back up to him.

His face softened as he took in my confusion. "Look, Bella, don't take this the wrong way, but," he paused, his eyes darting through the apartment behind me before he grabbed my hand and pulled me into the hall and quietly shut the door.

"I realize that you are slightly unaware of your attractiveness, it's one of the things I like about you, but you can't saunter around the apartment like that," he waved his hand up and down my body, "when there is a guy staying with you."

"But I'm not wearing anything provocative…" I trailed off, truly perplexed as to what in the world about my simple attire would attract anyone.

"That's what I am talking about, Bella. You don't even know how tempting you are. Those shorts," he sighed, "are too short, and your legs look… and that t-shirt shows off all of your curves," he explained, although his aggravation was sizzling out as he appreciated said curves. He placed his hands on my hips and pulled me closer to him. "It isn't fair to anyone for you to be so tempting."

He leaned down and kissed me once softly on the lips before I pulled away. "Come in. I'll go change if it bothers you so much and then we can figure out dinner, ok?" I opened the door and waited for him to follow me in. His shoulders relaxed as he started in after me.

The whole awkward dance I was doing by being in a relationship with James, all the while growing closer to Edward by the minute was difficult, but I was discovering it was possible. I just needed James to warm up to Edward a little more.

He followed me in and stopped after noticing Edward on the couch, who looked up at James and gave him a slight nod of acknowledgement before continuing to work.

"I'll just be a minute," I told James before heading to my room.

I felt odd leaving the two of them alone, and the entire time I changed I kept waiting for the noise of something breaking to alert me that some type of testosterone-charged altercation had begun. When no sounds came, I decided I was playing up the situation and needed to relax. They were grown men.

I changed into jeans but kept my t-shirt, because it was innocent enough and I knew James had been slightly overreacting.

Edward gave me a look when I walked back out in jeans but I shrugged it off. It was a small price to pay to make James feel better about the living circumstances with Edward.

James POV

When I saw Bella answer the door, every inch of my body that had been previously exhausted tensed. Every muscle in my body tightened, prepared to beat Edward for getting to see this side of _my_ Bella. And I just fucking knew he was in there, spending all kinds of time with her, taking advantage of my absence. I couldn't keep the words from sliding out from between clenched teeth.

"What the fuck are you wearing?" Hearing the dark tone I immediately tried to think of a way to backtrack. She looked down at the skimpy shorts and form-fitting t-shirt, then back up to me with wide eyes. It was obviously something she had worn a lot, and it had more than likely been conservative at one time, but the wear and tear made the fabric thin and clingy from one too many trips through the washing machine had shrunk everything in just the right places.

"Look, Bella, don't take this the wrong way, but," I stopped and realized I was going about this the wrong way. All I needed was fucking Cullen to overhear something he didn't like and he would be working her against me. I took her hand and pulled her into the hall with me before closing the door.

"I realize that you are slightly unaware of your attractiveness, it's one of the things I like about you, but you can't saunter around the apartment like that when there is a guy staying with you." I was proud at how I kept my temper in check. I wondered briefly how long he had been ogling her, but steered away quickly when I remembered I was trying _not_ to go in there and rip his head off… well, at least not in front of Bella.

"But, I'm not wearing anything provocative…" she said in all of her blissful ignorance. The girl had no clue how fucking unbelievable she was.

"That's what I am talking about, Bella. You don't even know how tempting you are. Those shorts," I swallowed, trying to focus on what I wanted to say and not the way her legs looked, "are too short, and your legs look…" I stopped and tried again. "And that t-shirt shows off all of your curves," I finally spat out. Her body was distracting me, calling to me. I had never seen so much of her. I pulled her to me by her hips, wanting to prove that this outfit, while it was technically appropriate for lounging, was still sexy. "It isn't fair to anyone for you to be so tempting."

I couldn't stop myself from pressing my lips to hers. She was perfect, and she was mine.

"Come in," she said as she stepped back from me and inside her door. "I'll go change if it bothers you so much and then we can figure out dinner, ok?"

I followed her in. That motherfucking Edward was sitting on the couch, pecking at his keyboard. He noticed me and did his best to act like he didn't care, but I knew better. He would learn tonight who she belonged to.

"I'll just be a minute," Bella said before disappearing down the hall.

I walked over and sat down in the living room chair, watching with a cocky smile as he studied the screen on his laptop. After a minute he finally acknowledged me with a sideward glance.

"James," he regarded, not letting his eyes linger away from the computer for long.

"Edward," I said back smugly. "Working, I assume?"

"Yes," he answered without looking away.

"You seem to do a lot of that," I stated.

"Yes," he repeated, his voice sharper than before.

"That's too bad," I offered. "I guess you don't have time for much else, then."

His face hardened noticeably and he opened his mouth to reply, but the sound of Bella's door halted both of our mouths.

She had changed into jeans, but left the shirt. I wanted to get angry that she hadn't changed it, but her tits looked too fucking good in it. It was probably no tighter than anything else she owned, but it was something about the way it hung on her that made me want to rip it off. I sighed, deciding that at least I was here to fucking supervise if she was going to be wearing it.

Edward's gave her a pointed glance that did not go unnoticed, but he said nothing, as I knew he would.

Pussy.

Bella sat down next to him and I wanted to jump across the room to put myself between them, but anchored myself to the chair. It was my fault that her only option was the couch anyway. I would have to watch my actions to make sure they stayed apart, at least while I was here to do something about it.

"So, what do you guys want to do about food?" she asked, looking from me to Edward, who shrugged and continued to work.

Asshole.

She looked back to me. "Pizza? Or I have some leftovers."

"Or we can order sushi," Edward said under his breath. Bella giggled and elbowed him, and he smirked slightly.

What? They had inside jokes now? What the fuck? I was overcome by the desire to choke him until he told me every fucking thing they had ever said to one another.

He didn't look at me when he had made the snarky comment, but I knew he had done it for my benefit.

"Whatever you want is fine with me, babe," I told her. I really didn't care, I just wanted to haul her out of here and away from the fucker who was sitting way too close. My hand started twitching, wanting to move to her so bad. I took a deep breath and focused.

"I'll just order a pizza," she decided before grabbing the phone from the table. While she chatted on the phone, I just stared at Edward. I fucking loathed him. I had to find out when he was leaving, and I had a feeling if it wasn't tomorrow I wouldn't be able to keep myself from removing him with my own two hands.

When Bella hung up the phone she grabbed the remote and flipped the television on, surfing through the channels silently. I let my eyes drift to her to still my nerves and cool off; obviously I couldn't do anything about Edward tonight and continuing to allow him to ruffle me would only alarm Bella.

"Oh!" she said suddenly, sitting up and looking at me. "If you're here, does that mean you got your guy? Did you solve the case?" she asked excitedly.

I shook my head. "We have a lead, but they decided to put a fresh pair of eyes on it. Jenkins and I have tonight and tomorrow off, unless of course something big happens." The case was pissing me off. I had become a legend around the department, making detective so young. Even my first year as a uniform everyone knew I had above average investigation and tracking skills. Since getting promoted, I had held true to my reputation; Jenkins and I always solved our shit. And fast. This case had become the exception, and I knew what the underlying factor was.

Edward.

He had me so fucking distracted that I couldn't focus at work. I would be in the middle of doing a person check, or reviewing credit card statements, when suddenly the thought of him giving Bella small but inappropriate touches while she giggled crossed my ragged mind. Next thing I knew, files had been scattered across the floor and I was gripping the edge of the table in order to stay put. Jenkins thought I was taking the case too seriously and asked for a reprieve.

What-the-fuck-ever. I wanted to be the one to solve the case, but not more than I wanted to break Edward's fingers to keep him from touching her, even if it was only for the sake of my sanity.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I really hope you catch him soon," she said sweetly, and I smiled at her in return. She was always so concerned and considerate.

"We will," I assured her. "But at least for now, we can take advantage of my break."

The comment made her flush, and it was like a rose blooming as it spread throughout her face and neck. I was appreciating it thoroughly when I caught Edward paying attention as well.

Oh. Fuck. No. That was _my_ fucking blush. My hands fisted and my knuckles pressed threateningly against the skin that covered them.

"So, Edward," I managed to say calmly, although a little too loud. "How long are you in for this time around?"

He looked from Bella's pink-tinted face and neck to me, a little too fucking smugly. "Not sure yet, but I'm guessing until Thanksgiving."

I saw Bella flinch slightly before I realized she had done it in response to _my_ reaction. My teeth had shut loudly and I could feel my own blood rush to my face, though not from embarrassment.

I swallowed and unhinged my jaw. "And you're going to sleep on a couch, for what? A month and a half? Sounds a little uncomfortable to me."

"There is no reason to stay anywhere else," he said bluntly. I imagined elbowing him in the neck, perhaps crushing his trachea in the process.

"Wouldn't you like a bed? Some privacy, maybe?" I edged. _Either man the fuck up and say you are staying here for Bella, or get the fuck out._

"When I am in town, I spend time with my family. I don't care where I sleep. I don't do much of it anyway." His mouth was set in a hard line and I could tell I was starting to piss him off.

"So is Alice the only family you have in Washington then? Or just your favorite family member?" I pushed, silently begging him to take it to the next level. I needed the excuse to lay him out.

"Alice," Edward said with his jaw tight, "Is the only family who lives in Seattle. Seattle is where my company is based."

"Gig Harbor isn't too far from Seattle," I said causally, which caused him to tighten and coil even more. "I would think your parents would probably appreciate seeing you too."

Edward took a very noticeably large breath before answering. "How do you know where my parents live?"

The doorbell rang signaling the arrival of the pizza, and Bella jumped up quickly and ran toward the door. I had almost forgotten she was sitting between us during the conversation that had turned very intense, very quickly.

Edward's eyes never left mine while Bella took care of the pizzas somewhere behind us. His breath was labored.

"How did you know my parents were in Gig Habor?" he asked again.

I shrugged. "Bella mentioned it." She hadn't. She had told me about the fair in Puyallup after seeing his and Alice's parents, and after a little searching I had found them.

Figures he was a privileged little shit, growing up with a doctor for a daddy and a multimillion estate.

We sat there and stared, neither of us ready to back down. I just fucking knew he was after Bella. And now he was going to be a problem until Thanksgiving. I had to put a plan into motion to keep him away from her.

I was somewhat comforted that Bella was clearly choosing me over him, but I didn't trust him. He was starting to pick up on a little too much for my comfort, and he would be able to turn Bella against me if he had enough time.

Evidently, he had about six weeks.

Bella spoke softly from behind me, interrupting our staring match. "Pizza is ready guys."

We both blanched and turned towards her. I stood quickly and made my way to her, wrapping one arm around her waist and leading her back to the dining room table.

I caught Edward heading toward the bathroom from the corner of my eye and I took the opportunity to apologize to Bella.

I kept my voice somewhat low. "Bella, I'm sorry. I know I'm acting like an ass. First about your clothes and then out there with Edward," I looked down and shook my head to seem more sincere. "It's just, I don't like him here with you all the time, especially if Alice is going to be gone a lot. I don't want anyone to take advantage of you."

She gave me a small smile and reached up to touch my cheek. "I know you are looking out for me, but you don't have to worry about Edward. He's a really nice guy."

Fucking great. She thinks he is a nice guy. This has got to stop.

"Bella, don't you think it is a little odd that he is spending so much time here? Don't you think that a normal person would get themselves a hotel if they were going to be somewhere for almost two months, instead of sleeping on their sister's couch?" I tried to reason with her.

"I don't know, James. I have met their parents, and they seem really family-oriented. I just think it was the way they were raised. Plus, I'm pretty sure Alice would pitch a fit if Edward tried to stay at a hotel," she said with a smile. I smiled back, pretending that her clueless answer had assuaged me for the time being.

Bella was too naive for her own good.

Edward walked back in and up to the table, grabbing one of the plates Bella had laid out along with a couple of pieces of pizza.

"I'll just eat over here," he said, more to Bella than to me, then walked away. Good fucking riddance.

I tucked one arm around her and ate with the other, enjoying having this time with her alone.

Bella POV

James and I spent the rest of the evening at the kitchen table, making plans and discussing what movies we would like to see this weekend. I told him all about my writing class that I was excited to delve into, and he talked a lot about his case and all the pressure he had been under.

Later, I walked James to the door and promised to see him the next day during the hour I had between school and work. He leaned down to kiss me goodbye, starting with a soft, sweet kiss, but soon his hands were roaming a bit wildly before landing on my waist and gripping me tightly there.

I pushed back and gave him a slightly admonishing grin. I knew wasn't doing that for me, it was for Edward, but I was pretty sure Edward was _not_ watching.

"I'll see you tomorrow. Enjoy your day off," I told him before closing the door.

Sighing as I walked away, I briefly considered heading straight for my room. James and Edward's little spat had frayed my nerves a bit and it was getting somewhat late anyway. But, in spite of all my rationale, something pulled me to Edward and the couch.

I sat down next to him, only to be engulfed in silence. He was still working on his computer. I couldn't imagine him not having a headache from staring at that thing for the majority of the day.

"Do you mind if I watch some TV?" I asked.

"Of course not," he said softly.

I switched it on, but didn't watch it.

I glanced at the iPod on the table, remembering how carefree we had been earlier in the evening, and how tense things were now. I almost felt like I should apologize on James' behalf, but I couldn't make myself say anything. I wanted to pretend that the heated quality the conversation between them had taken on was all in my mind.

Was Edward staying here for me? I knew he may have liked me, although I wasn't sure why, but I couldn't imagine him staying on a couch for weeks at a time just to be around me.

I looked over at him, openly studying his profile; it couldn't have been more perfect if an artist had sculpted it from marble. His brow was slightly crinkled as his eyes squinted a little. Maybe he needed glasses.

After a few moments of my staring, he finally sighed and turned to me. I didn't know what to say, so I just looked at him. His eyes danced back and forth between mine, reading me.

"I know it isn't my place to say anything, but I feel like I have to. I don't like him, Bella," he said decisively, looking down at the few inches of couch between us. "He isn't good for you. In fact, he isn't good for anyone."

I frowned. "What does that mean?" I could understand them not getting along, but why did that disqualify him from everyone?

He shook his head, visibly warring with himself. "It means," he started and then sighed. "It means that he is… extreme. It's in everything he does. The way he watches you, the way he provokes me, the way he talks…"

My brow furrowed and my frown deepened. "I… don't…" I didn't get it. I mean, yeah, I saw him and the way he acted tonight in all his verbal sparring glory, but… wasn't that just him being jealous?

"Tell me something, Bella," he said, watching me intently. "Did you get cold earlier? When you put on your jeans?"

"Well… no, not really," I admitted, knowing where he was headed with this.

"So he made you change then?" he accused, his face hard.

"He didn't make me, he just said it bothered him. I was being accommodating," I explained.

Obviously frustrated, he ran a hand through his hair, his fingers creating temporary ripples in the brown and red tinted locks.

"Just," he started, and then looked up at me. His green eyes were full of compassion, causing my breath to catch in my throat. "Just promise me you'll be careful."

Locked in his stare, I nodded dumbly and sat there, not willing to look away from him.

Suddenly the urge to close the distance between us, to have the feeling of his plush, full lips against mine, shook me. Reasons not to do so, along with all thoughts of James, were fleeting. My whole body seemed to be pushing me forward, frantic for his touch and the complementing sensations of ease and desperation it would stir.

Edward remained still, watching me with a battle of his own evident behind his eyes.

In a final attempt to hold my ground I closed my eyes, knowing that it was my only way out. Giving in to whims wouldn't be fair to James, nor myself in the end. It was hard to remember when he was so close what it felt like when he was so far away, on the other side of the planet for that matter.

I knew I had to get up immediately. Without opening my eyes I stood up and uttered a very rushed "goodnight" before jetting for my room.

When I was in the hall, I was hit by a strong sense of déjà vu, remembering the last time I had run from an almost-kiss on the couch. I nearly expected to hear him behind me or feel him grab my wrist, and I almost pleaded with any deity that it would be true.

But it wasn't. He had let me run.

**Aww, I know. Aren't they all angsty? So, this was the lead up to some big stuff getting ready to go down and I am working hard to make sure the next chapter reads well and flows good and… pretty much doesn't suck. **

**I don't know if anyone will be interested or not, but I am signing up for the Support Stacie Author Auction. If ya give me a bid I will write you a story, anything you want. It could be a scene (any scene - *wink wink*) you want to see in this story or something completely different. I am at your mercy!**

**I actually just did it today so I don't have a specific link for my offer for you guys yet, but I do have the link to the main site in my profile if you want to find out more about it. Please go over and bid on anyone for a story. When I get the link to my story offer I will post it in my profile as well.**

**Anywho, let me know what ya thought about the chapter! I am dying to know what everyone thought about the little showdown. ;)**


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: Yada, yada, you people know the drill. I only dream of owning Twilight… but I would settle for just Edward. **

**A/N: Wow, look at me! I updated in 6 days! New record, right? As always, non of this would be possible without my goddess beta, herinfiniteeyes, who pulled a fast one on me and had this waiting in my inbox all pretty with 12 hours. I love her.**

**Important note at the end!**

"Hey," Edward greeted me as I came in the front door of the apartment. I glanced over and saw him in front of the open fridge, digging through the contents. Grabbing a bottle of water, he gave the door a tap to close.

"Hey," I said sullenly, my voice hinting at my long and horrendous day. I let my book bag fall off my shoulder and hit the floor.

"What's wrong?" he asked, twisting off the top of his bottle and taking a long drink. His neck muscles flexed and moved as he swallowed, which tempted to brighten my mood, until I remembered he wasn't mine.

"Just one of those days, I guess." I shrugged and headed toward my room. I didn't feel like elaborating. It had been full of mountainous homework assignments and rude, pushy students at the library. I had a strong desire to listen to something loud and incoherent in my room.

And I did just that.

I didn't have the luxury of an iPod, so my tension was released on big, old fashioned stereo speakers with no sympathy for anyone within earshot. I laid back on my bed and closed my eyes, letting the loud and strong beats surround and distract me.

When the first CD ended I got up and put another one; same distraction under a different title. I resumed my position on the bed.

Two weeks had passed since James and Edwards' heated discussion in the living room over Edward's living arrangements. I had made sure to keep them apart since and neither of them had mentioned it again. James acted as if the whole thing had never happened, seeming glad to be spending time out and about with me instead of in the apartment.

Edward and I were also enjoying time together too, though most of it was in the apartment on the couch or while out doing chores, like shopping and laundry. Whenever I had something mundane to do I already knew that Edward would volunteer to tag along. We were getting closer everyday, all the while carefully avoiding the invisible line that would take it too far. It was difficult to ledge walk.

There were moments where the room temperature seemed to rise, or times when I thought I would implode if I didn't touch him, but I had found that catching a breath of fresh air on the balcony usually helped.

I wasn't sure how far I had gotten into the second CD, almost asleep despite the heavy beats and disturbing lyrics, when I felt a hand grab my leg. In a panic, I shot up and scrambled back against my headboard and hyperventilated before I even realized it was only Edward.

He was clearly amused. With a huge grin he reached for the radio knob and turned the music down.

"Nice reflexes," he chuckled.

I huffed and grabbed one of my pillows from beside me and launched it at him, missing by a mile.

"I take it back," he was full out laughing now.

"Alright," I growled under my breath, grabbing my other pillow and climbing off the bed. With narrowed eyes I slowly stalked toward him with it raised threateningly up and over my right shoulder. He backed away from me, holding up his hands in surrender while the remnants of his laughter faded.

"Hey now, I tried knocking, and then I tried shouting once I came in. And Alice was the one who made me interrupt," he tried to plead his innocence, but it was useless because he couldn't completely wipe the smile from his face.

I advanced on him with an evil smile and one cocked eyebrow until he was backed against the closet doors. We both held our positions for a minute, his of surrender and mine of attack, before I finally lowered the pillow.

He sighed and lowered his hands. "Thank you. Now, Alice wants-"

I cut him off with a sudden strike of the pillow, going for a body shot. He took the first one in the ribs but then ducked as I swung again. I put most of my weight into my swing, so when the pillow whipped past him and on around, my entire body followed. While in mid-spin, Edward grabbed me around the waist from behind and picked me up. He carried me a few steps to the bed and tossed me on it.

I fell back against it, giggling like a twelve-year-old girl.

"Are you done now?" he asked, standing at the foot of the bed in triumph.

I nodded and propped myself up on my elbows. "That was as therapeutic as the music," I said, grinning.

"Good. Glad I could be of service." He did a little bow. "Now, as I was saying, Alice is requesting our presence for dinner at Ray's Boathouse in about," he glanced at his watch, "thirty minutes. Attendance is mandatory."

I let my arms relax and fell back flat against the bed. "Oh, alright," I grumbled and sighed. I could hear Edward's snickering from the doorway as he left to get ready. I wasn't really in the mood for dinner out, nor did I have money for dinner out, but I figured it couldn't make the day any worse. It was better than sitting in my room, anyway.

I pulled myself from the bed and over to my closet, trying to figure out what to wear. Combing through the limited options, I finally pulled out the dark periwinkle wrap dress that I now owned thanks to my first and last shopping trip with Alice that had taken place shortly after I had moved in. It was the first time I would actually get to wear it. I quickly pulled it on and looked at myself in the mirror. The dress was simple and classy, but I still felt somewhat uncomfortable in it. I was used to the comfort my jeans brought me, and the feeling of the air around my legs made me feel naked.

Without any other options but wearing jeans to a nice restaurant, I turned away from the mirror, grabbed my lone pair of dressy shoes from the back of my closet and made my way into the hallway. I sent up a silent prayer that I wouldn't make a fool out of myself in the simple two inch heels.

When I reached the bathroom and found it empty, I started to walk in, but paused. There was no way Edward was changed already. Had he changed in the living room?

Turning my head toward the living room, I bit my lip and started tiptoeing to the end of the hallway, thankful my shoes were still in my hand. Slowly I edged to the corner of the wall and pressed myself up against it. Finally, I peeked around the corner.

Edward was standing in front of the couch, facing the television with his back to me. He was still wearing the gray slacks he had been in earlier and they sat perfectly on his waist, low and snug.

But more importantly, he was utterly shirtless. I somewhat noticed a shirt in his hands in front of him that he was getting ready to on, but more than anything, I saw his naked back. I tried to swallow but my mouth was bone dry. His muscles contracted and twisted as he moved, making shadows and ridges between his shoulder blades and down his spine, making my knees go weak. His bare arms rose to pull on the shirt, but I only got a glance at their shape and definition before ducking away and moving as quickly as I could back to the bathroom.

Grabbing the sink with both hands, I let my head hang forward, my hair curtaining my face as I took steadying breaths. I was overcome with how much I wanted him. It wasn't like anything I had ever felt before, this all consuming need to just… touch him.

_It's lust_, I realized, which in turn made me blush and my body grow even hotter. I had been attracted to other guys before, but this was clearly on another level.

Edward affected me like no one ever had. I couldn't figure out what it was about him in particular, but I knew it was more than just his good looks. There was something underneath everything that pulled me, and my body, to him. It wasn't until that moment that I realized trying to resist him was futile.

The only thing that kept me planted to the bathroom sink was the knowledge that no matter how I ached for him, and no matter how much I wanted him and was ready to give in, he would always have to leave.

When my breathing returned to normal, I lifted my head and looked in the mirror. My face was flushed and my eyes were still a little wide, but it was better than before. I released the sink, grabbed my brush from the toiletry bag beneath the vanity, and gave my hair a quick run through. To appease Alice I also took out my lip-gloss and put a thin layer on.

As I was throwing the items back into my bag and closing the cabinet door, Edward appeared in the bathroom doorway and leaned against the frame causally. He had put on a plain white button up, but wore it more causally with the sleeves rolled up and the top buttons undone.

"Wow, you look… great," he said, his eyes traveling over my dress.

"Alice," I explained to him with a slight smile. I sat down on the closed toilet lid and started pulling on my shoes. "I got it the one and only time I went shopping with her."

After slipping on my second shoe I looked up and caught him staring at my heel adorned feet. I stood and looked at him expectantly as he was blocking the doorway.

He suddenly cleared his throat and stepped sideways, making room for me. "After you," he said. I tried to hide the smile that spread from knowing that I had flustered him, but it broke through before I could get past him. I decided that wearing dresses wasn't so bad after all.

After I grabbed the nicest sweater I owned and threw it on over the dress, we walked together silently down to the parking lot. The sky was low with threatening, funereal clouds looming above us. It was already mid October and I frowned at the chilly weather that had stolen my summer so quickly. I hated being stuck in big, bulky coats for the majority of the year.

Edward opened the passenger door of his car and waited until I was safely inside before closing it. Even though he had opened it for me the other few times I had rode with him, for some reason this time I felt awkward about it. Maybe it was that we were dressed up, or maybe because it was just the two of us leaving together, on our way to meet a couple for dinner, but everything was beginning to feel like a date. Edward also felt the different vibe between us, or was aware of my nervousness, because he was quiet in the car on the way.

When we arrived at the restaurant, Alice and Jasper were already waiting for us at a table, sitting on one side of a booth and cuddling together. Alice grinned as she noticed my dress and gave me a little wink that I was sure Edward noticed, and my face lit up like a roman candle.

As I sat and scooted down the bench seat, I felt my face warm again, knowing Alice had planned on us having to sit so close as well. Edward slid in beside me and gave me what looked like an apologetic smile.

"Wow, sis, you clean up nice," Jasper grinned at me. "I don't know that I've ever seen you in a dress." He tapped his chin playfully and pretended to sort through his memory. "Nope, I'm gonna say this is a first. I wonder… what would the special occasion be that made you decide to wear one tonight?" he teased from across the table.

I shot him a dirty look. "It was this or jeans." I resisted the childish urge to stick out my tongue.

He only laughed softly and took a drink from his fluted water glass.

"So," Alice said as I picked my menu and tried to hide behind it. "Edward said you were abusing our neighbors with some pretty explicit Perfect Circle."

"I had a long day," I said, not bothering to remove the menu from my face.

"Oh yeah? What happened?" she probed.

"Med students happened," I said, deciding on lobster bisque and laying the menu down.

Alice suddenly nodded in understanding, obviously remembering my stories of a particularly rude med student named Victoria who had terrorized me more than once. She would come in at least twice a week and bully whoever had the luck of working the front desk.

Tonight she had complained to my supervisor about my incompetence for nearly twenty minutes when I told her a particular reference book she needed wasn't available. Luckily my poor manager was familiar with her and didn't take it to heart.

The thought of her was starting to frustrate me, but I was saved when the waiter came and took our orders. After he left I made a mental promise not to think about her again for the rest of the night.

"How was your day, Alice?" I asked, knowing the question would launch some story or another.

"My day was fine. Ask Jasper about his day," she hedged, her eyes darting over to him.

I was still somewhat annoyed about Jasper's teasing, but I played along. "Alright," I turned to him with a cheesy smile. "How was your day Jasper?"

"Excellent. You are now looking at an Air Traffic Controller," he said proudly.

"Jasper! That's great!" I said excitedly, all of his irritating comments forgotten.

"Congrats," I heard Edward say from my side with a smile that seemed... wistful, maybe?

I wished I could squeeze his hand or acknowledge it in some way, but instead I clasped them together in my lap while Jasper shared the details of his job, clearly elated.

Dinner was amazing; the food, company and comfortableness of the whole event made me long for it to be a regular thing. For Jasper and Alice, Edward and I, even Em and Rosalie, to be a group. To be inseparable. To be lifelong friends and family.

For some reason I couldn't see James fitting in as easily, and not because he wasn't related to someone else. I couldn't put my finger on exactly why I felt like that, but in the end, I chalked it up to my unreasonable and unrelenting attraction to Edward.

The scene outside the restaurant looked like something out of a movie as we left, with rain coming down in a curtain-like form. The valet retrieved Edward's Volvo and we climbed in and waved goodbye to Alice and Jasper.

When Edward had first come back into town they had quit sleeping at each other's places for a while, but it was short lived. Now they just didn't spend the night at our apartment together, only at Jasper's.

Edward didn't show any sign of discomfort, which either meant he was pretending everything was innocent, or he liked Jasper enough not to let it worry him.

The rain hitting the car sounded like a violent chorus the entire way home, and the silence that had engulfed us on the way to the restaurant returned to accompany us home. As we pulled into the complex's parking lot I started looking around Edward's car for an umbrella. The seats and floor were not only bare in the back, but meticulously swept and spotless.

"Where is your umbrella?" I asked, looking in the door pocket on my side and not finding it there either.

Edward groaned beside me and I turned my head to him in a whiplash-like fashion.

"It's not in here?" I asked.

He pulled the car into an empty space in the lot and killed the engine. It was almost impossible to see anything past the windows, but a large shadow that I believed to be the apartment loomed more than halfway across the lot. I groaned as my head hit the back of the headrest.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I left it in the apartment."

"It's ok," I assured him. I smiled, but didn't make an attempt to open my eyes or turn to him. "Maybe it will let up in a few."

"Yeah, I kind of doubt that," he said.

"Yeah, me too."

We did wait a few minutes, listening to the rain pelt the outside of his car relentlessly. I kept my head back, eyes closed, almost enjoying the moment.

Finally I turned to him. "It's just a little water, right?" my lips turning up faintly.

He smiled back and nodded. Our eyes still locked, we both reached for our door handles, and almost simultaneously shoved them open. The rain was coming down so hard it almost hurt, but we were both laughing as we started to run through the parking lot. I was soaked to the bone the minute I stepped outside the car, my dress clinging to every inch of my body and my sweater weighted down with water, but at the moment none of it bothered me.

Edward placed his hand under my elbow, preempting my clumsiness in the heels, but the tingling sensation stung my arm all the same.

He reached the lobby door first and held it open for me and I ducked inside. The cool air of the room against my wet skin sent chills throughout my body and I wrapped my arms around myself.

I turned to see Edward wipe away the water dripping from his face, then run his hands through his hair before smiling at me. His clothes clung to him as well, his white shirt practically see-through, and I had the strongest desire to peel it from his body.

I shook my head and started toward the elevators, hoping he hadn't caught me ogling him. I pressed the call button for the elevator and stared at the light as the one to my left started down from the ninth level. In the elevator I stared at the floor, looking anywhere but at him. I didn't want to see his knowing smirk, and I wouldn't be unable to keep my eyes from tracing the contours of his body, yet again.

Once inside the apartment, I grabbed a few towels from the bathroom and went straight to my room. The clothes were impossible to remove, sticking to me like a second skin. I dressed in warm flannel pants and an over-sized sweatshirt, pulling my wet hair up into a knot on top of my head.

When I walked back out to the living room, Edward had changed into black lounge pants and a light gray t-shirt and was laughing as he watched something on TV, leaning against the arm of the couch. He looked so different in the casual clothes, with his hair wet and dark. It was the most relaxed I had ever seen him.

He laughed again, making me turn to the television to see what was on.

"No way!" I said, immediately sitting next to him. "The Goonies?"

He turned to me with a smile. "Yeah, I was flipping through and found it."

"I haven't seen this in forever. Emmett and I used to love this movie. He would always do Chunk impressions, especially of the scene where he is crying and admitting all the bad things he did," I laughed at the memory.

He laughed as well, surely having trouble imagining my big, burly brother recreating the sobbing.

We spent the evening watching it, laughing and talking about the movie. It was well into the middle of the night when it ended and I went to bed.

I still wasn't completely sure what prompted James' sudden attack on my mouth and subsequently my body, but as we sat on his leather couch in his apartment the following night, it was as if some kind of switch had been flipped.

Honestly, I was surprised he had lasted this long. He had been so careful with me in the beginning, and continued to be for the most part, but he was a guy. I knew he was exclusive despite our lack of verbal commitment to one another, so all in all, it was just a matter of time.

He had looked over at me while we were watching TV, and when I turned to look back at him he practically lunged across the space between us to kiss me. I kissed him back, letting him slip his tongue into my mouth without hesitation. The kiss started out sweet but with just a little edge of excitement, before it escalated into full-on desperation. Suddenly his hands were gripping my sides roughly before sliding up my ribs and stopping along the bottom swells of my breasts. He was panting hard into my mouth, and even my own breaths were a bit labored, although I wasn't sure if it was for the same reason.

He pulled back and looked into my eyes, placing his hands on either side of my face. I could see the fire lit in them, his unbridled want. My heart beat wildly, because I didn't know what to make of his expression.

Then Edward's word '_extreme'_ floated to the front of my mind. At the time I wasn't sure what he was talking about, because I hadn't really noticed anything amiss with James. In fact, he was utterly patient and understanding.

But this look seemed to fit the James that Edward claimed to see.

"I love touching you," he said, his eyes still alight but his voice low. "I miss you so much when you are gone, and all I can think about is how you feel."

My mouth hung slightly open while my brain tried to process the way he was acting. James had never been so forward or aggressive, but before I could considerate it any longer his mouth was back on mine.

His hands left my face and wrapped around my biceps, holding them tightly. I tried to kiss him back, to keep up with him, but it was difficult. His mouth was almost frantic in the way it covered mine and moved against it, and with every few seconds his hands tightened on my arms until the grip was almost painful.

Without breaking the kiss, I jerked one arm into my body. He immediately released them both and said a rushed "sorry" into my mouth before moving his hands back to my ribs. They only stayed there momentarily while his frenzied kisses continued, sliding them up and down my ribs and over my stomach.

I finally got a much-needed breath when his lips left mine, only from them to leave a wet trail of open-mouthed kisses across my chin and down my throat. As he made his descent, he put weight into his hands and started pushing me down into the couch.

I went willingly, and my head met the armrest of his couch as I lay back, but only briefly. As soon as he had me reclined, his hands made a sudden and very rough pass at my chest. My body reacted immediately: my hands came up hard and pushed forcefully against his chest. As soon as enough of his weight was off of me, I stood up.

"James!" I shouted, feeling my eyes widen.

James' face drained. "God, I'm so sorry, Bella. I… I don't know what I was thinking-"

"Um, I think I should go home," I said, not able to listen to anything at the moment. I grabbed my purse from his coffee table and walked to the door.

"Wait, Bella! I'm so sorry! You can't leave now, we have to talk about this," James' voice pleaded from behind me, and I could tell he was following me to the door.

I turned on my heel to face him and he almost ran into me. "I can't talk about this right now," I said. My blood was pumping furiously and I could feel my pulse in my fingertips. "I'll call you later."

I turned around to the door and went to reach for it when I felt him grab my hand. I froze, turning my head slowly to look at him over my shoulder. "Let go of me, James."

He immediately dropped my hand. "Just let me drive you home," he pleaded.

"I'll walk. It's only a few blocks. I'll call you tomorrow, I promise." I walked out of his door and closed it behind me.

When I got outside of his building and started the five-block hike to my apartment, a light rain fell unceremoniously and covered me in a mist while my mind raced.

I couldn't wrap my mind around what had happened. He had gone from patient and kind to desperate and aggressive within seconds. His hands had been rough, when usually they were overly careful and patient. Something had made him break.

When I walked in the door of my apartment and out of the foyer, my eyes landed on Edward, sitting on his couch, lap covered in paperwork. He looked up and his face went from concentration to wide-eyed concern.

"Bella?" he said, removing papers from his lap without removing his eyes from mine. He stood and closed the distance between us quickly. "What happened?"

I stood in front of him, unseeing, dripping water on Alice's hardwood floors, trying to decide how to explain the strange events. I still wasn't sure what had come over James to make him act so… vigorous and… aggressive.

When my eyes focused, I was staring into Edward's white t-shirt. I lifted my head to see him, unsure how to explain. His hands came up, each softly cupping a bicep, a vast difference to the way James had held me.

"I think I saw what you were talking about the other night. About James."

Edward's expression changed then, his features allowing some anger to seep into them. "What happened, Bella? He didn't hurt you, did he?"

"No, no," I said, shaking my head. It wasn't a lie. He had gripped me tightly, but the pain was gone already, and that had been such a small part of what had happened. The big picture was that he had changed so drastically, and in almost an instant.

"Tell me what happened," Edward pleaded, his hands gently sliding up and down my arms, not seeming to notice the water logged sleeves of my jacket.

"I don't know," I said, my eyes unfocused again as I replayed the events, only to shudder. "Something inside of him just… snapped. He got really pushy, and he was just so… 'extreme,'" I quoted him, not knowing how else to relay it.

Edward didn't make me go into detail thankfully, just pulled me to him, his arms wrapping around my back and pulling me flush against his body. I immediately went to pull away to keep my soaked clothes from drenching his, but his arms only tightened around me. It was odd to think of the way his firm embrace differed from James', how it was that I knew that Edward's reluctance to let me go was not for his sake, but for mine. Somehow without seeing his face or having to hear him explain, I knew that his was friendly and comforting, and I knew that there wasn't even a possibility for it to be anything else.

I wasn't sure how long he held me, but when his arms finally loosened, the front of him was as damp as I was. He brought up his right hand pushed back a wet lock of hair that had been molded to my cheek by the rain.

"So what now?" he asked, and I recognized all the meanings it held. What should I do about me, what should I do about James, and what should I do about him?

I answered them all with a shrug.

"I guess I should talk to James," I said. I didn't really want to, but I needed to discuss everything with him and figure out what to do from here.

"Bella…" Edward said cautiously, not liking my idea.

"I have to at least clear the air," I explained, which didn't seem to ease Edward's mind any.

"You don't owe him anything. I don't know what happened, but it would probably be better for you to stay far away from him."

"Everyone deserves a chance to explain themselves," I said.

Edward shook his head and then closed his eyes, obviously biting back his frustration. "Do you want to know what it was that I noticed about him that made me worry?"

I didn't answer, I had a feeling even if I didn't want to know, he was going to tell me.

"It was the cookout, at Emmett's. The first day I met him. When your friend hit you with the volleyball, his first reaction was to go after him. Not to see about you. His first instinct was to tear apart that poor kid.

"He does the same thing when I'm around the two of you. He sees me as a threat, so his first thought is to find out where I am and what I'm doing. He keeps you within arms' reach, but the whole time what he is really worried about is keeping me away from you. Keeping everyone away from you."

I looked up at him as I digested his theory. I tried to think back, to anything he had done that should have alerted me to this, but I came up empty. Until tonight he had been patient and kind, friendly with everyone, excluding Edward of course.

But then I thought back to the volleyball incident, remembering how mad he had been at Mike. I had chalked it up to temper at the time, but in hindsight, the look in his eye had been feral. I tried to think of any other times a guy had been around me while we were together, but other than Edward, there weren't many.

I sighed and finally looked away from Edward's probing eyes. "I'm not saying I will continue to see him, but I do need to talk to him. At least to tell him I need some space from him."

Edward's lips turned into a wiry grin and he cocked his head slightly. "I could tell him for you."

Only a small smile flitted across my face before I shook my head at him. "I should be the one to talk to him."

"I know," he said and pulled me back into his arms, making my tense body relax. "And I'll be here if you need me."

"I know," I said into his chest.

James POV

I paced the floor while chanting a string of profanities.

I was a fucking idiot.

Months of building trust had just blown up in my face.

And it was all because of mother fucking Edward Cullen.

I stopped my pacing long enough to punch door of my apartment, thankful I had replaced it with a metal one the last time I had busted it. The pain in my fist was only a small distraction from the fucking disaster I had created.

I had moved too fast, but fuck me, it had been _months_, all the while I am watching Cullen get closer and closer. Taking her shopping and going to fancy-ass restaurants.

_Fuck!_

I walked back to the door and hit it again, harder this time. I didn't know how to fix this one; it was up to her more than anything. Of course, she was going to go back and probably tell Alice, or even worse, Edward, about tonight and they would tell her to back the fuck off.

_Dammit! _

I stopped again and pressed my hands against the wall in front of me; my elbows locked, and I hung my head between them. This was all manageable, I just had to keep being patient. She would see that this was all a mistake and everything would go back to normal. To the way it was before.

I just had to be patient, and she would come back.

And I was anything, if not patient.

**Please don't hurt me. I know you guys are ready to strangle B, but give her a break. When I started this thing my main goal was to not make her look stupid. That is why I crafted James' POV, to keep her view of James completely and utterly away from all the sinister stuff he does. If you were to read this story and skip all his POVs, I promise you would sympathize with her a little.**

**That being said, I know that she is being slightly stupid here, giving James a chance to clear the air, but all he really did was get a little excited and pushed the boundaries. I know, I know, not cool, but who hasn't had a guy get a lil frisky with them when it isn't always welcome?**

**ANYWHO**

**MEGA thanks to Bemily who rocked my world and bid $75 on me to win my bid in the Support Stacie Auction, and thanks to the others that had enough pity to bid on me too! You guys are so awesome! Altogether the auction raised $38,000! **

**One more note. I know, I'm sorry, you're bored with me now, but I am super excited about Kari creating a thread for me over at Twilighted! The link is in my profile, come chat! I will post teasers and whatnot if ya come!**

**Finally! Now, review! Just… don't make me cry ;)**


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. **

**A/N: For some reason this one was hard for me to write, and that's why it is fashionably late. Or that's my reason, anyway.**

**As always, thanks to my beta, herinfiniteeyes, for being all supah fast and for telling me I don't suck every time, even though I totally expect to hear it.**

**So…. I am going to be in Tennessee next week with my hubs and kiddos, and ALL the in-laws. His parents, his brother and his family, and his two sisters next week. Yeah, that's right, I am going on vacation with 8 adults and 5 kids, all age 4 and under. Anyone want to shoot me now? I'd appreciate it.**

**Anywho, what it all boils down to is I won't have a chance to update until I get back. I do promise to plot my lili heart out though, and give ya a chappy as soon as I get back!**

I brought my coffee to my lips and blew, trying to cool it off enough to be able to sip it. The whip cream on top gave the illusion of the drink being cool enough to drink, but I had already scalded the tip of my tongue and now I was overly cautious.

It was purely coincidence that I had chosen this coffee shop. When I had told James to meet me here I was only thinking of its close proximity to the apartment. Now that I was in the actual place, it dawned on me that this was where we had met for coffee a few months ago after meeting at the bar, when we were first getting to know each other.

On that afternoon, however many months ago, meeting him had been exciting. It made me feel like a grown up, meeting up with an attractive guy I had met in a bar to talk about a real relationship.

In high school I had really only dated one boy named Jacob. He was in the class below me and from the beginning we both knew that it was never meant to go past the friend level. I had technically gone out with one other guy, Sam, but just to a school dance, at which neither of us actually danced.

James was different for many reasons. He was the first guy I really dated. The first person to really show an interest in me and really pursue me. The first guy to _really_ kiss me. It was the first real thing I had ever experienced. And now I was wondering how real it had ever been.

Part of me wanted to believe that I wasn't still naïve enough to get into this relationship for the sole reason of being in one. I had made it this far in life without having to be with someone. However, the other part of me, the part that knew better, knew that that was exactly what it had been.

I felt foolish, looking back at myself and my decisions only months ago. More than that, I felt bad. I had led him along, encouraged him when there were never any feelings growing for him inside of me. His feelings and attraction were always present, where I had felt like I was always making excuses not to let things, physically and emotionally, go any further.

It wasn't like I wasn't attracted to him. He was handsome: tall, blonde, steel-gray eyes. He oozed confidence and masculinity. He had a steady job, lived close by, and got along with my brother. But what it all came down to was it just wasn't there for me.

His pushing the physical relationship had been an eye opener of sorts, but I couldn't honestly say it was the sole reason of the pending conversation. This 'clean break,' as I had called it to Edward, was overdue.

I had never had to make a 'clean break' before. I had been fortunate enough up unto this point not to have had to actually speak out loud of a relationship's end. It was always mutual, or even just plain not necessary because there was hardly anything there to begin with. Needless to say I was more than nervous about the coming discussion, especially since James seemed so devoted to me already.

I was taking my first bearable sip of coffee when I looked up and saw him walking slowly toward my table.

James POV

It had been two days since I had seen Bella. Two days since my dick took over my actions and caused one of my biggest and stupidest slips to date.

It was almost a blessing that she had waited two days after the fact to meet, because up until this point I had been so enraged at myself, and slightly at her. I wasn't sure I was capable of handling whatever shit storm this conversation would bring.

If it had not been for my uncontainable wrath, the last two days would have been unbearable. I had not gone more than eighteen hours without seeing my Bella since the night I met her, and now that I had calmed slightly I was feeling the repercussions of withdrawal. I depended on her nearly as much as oxygen, much more than food or sleep.

I walked to the café where she had suggested we meet, not missing the fact that it was the one where we had first sat down and gotten to know one another. It was a sign, I had decided, a sign of a new beginning. We would start over, and forget the whole fucking thing ever happened.

I rounded the last corner, which brought the little shop into view. Its large, pane glass windows revealed its occupants, and I could immediately see her. My eyes were always drawn to her and I was positive I would have been able to pick her out of any crowd. She called to me like no other.

It should have brought me joy to finally be able to lay eyes on her again after so long, should have made me fucking elated, but instead a dark cloud hazed my vision and my muscles went ridged. She was sitting there looking fucking pensive and nervous, taking small sips of her drink and chewing her bottom lip.

Fuck.

I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and took a few much-needed deep breaths.

This was unacceptable. She was not going to fucking leave me. If she was here to tell me she never wanted to see me again…

I took another deep breath.

After a short moment, I pushed all the racing violent thoughts behind me and walked to the door of the café, taking carefully calculated steps in so I would not break into a run. I wanted to skip right over the talk, scoop her up and take her with me, but the place was too crowded and it might even be unnecessary.

I approached her table, remembering my slow and even breaths. I stopped and smiled the best I could.

"Seat taken?" I asked, trying to keep my voice light.

She gave a grim smile and nodded for me to sit.

Fuck.

I sat down and stared at her from across the table. It was going to be difficult as fuck to apologize and seem sincere while she sat across from me looking like the young, inexperienced girl that she was, getting ready to fucking leave me.

When she didn't speak first, her eyes darting around the shop as she tried to collect her thoughts, I decided I would start. I needed to attempt the apology before she started anyway, because if she was here to end it, I wouldn't be able to see straight before long.

"Before you say anything," I said, her eyes traveling up to mine, "I know I was an asshole." Shit. _Try _not_ to be vulgar_. "I don't know what came over me. You have to know I would never push you further than you feel comfortable. I just let the moment get anyway from me."

I took another breath and hoped that it sounded sincere. She took a deep breath of her own.

"I know. You have been so patient, too," she said, allowing her eyes to fall to her cup. "But since then, I have been doing a lot of thinking."

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

"I think that we may need to step back from everything for a bit," she said in barely more than a whisper, still looking down at her cup. "I just don't think I'm ready for this yet. It's my fault, all of it. I shouldn't have kept it up this long; I knew that I was in over my head. As much as I wanted to think I was ready for all this change, school and a job and living on my own and dating, it isn't at all like I thought it would be."

She finally looked up at me, her eyes round and pitiful looking, and if it weren't for that I would have lost it by now.

"I know this is the last thing that any guy wants to hear, but… I think we should just be friends."

My chest tightened and my breathing went from deep, even breaths to short and shallow, but I was able to keep from smacking the table or yelling at her, which I considered a win. I looked down at the table to keep her from noticing any of the wild emotions that were flying across my eyes.

My first thought was to hoist her over my shoulder and take her to my place, café patrons be damned. She was fucking mine, anyway. But I wasn't ready for that, to force her roughly. I wasn't prepared. I had to consider her brother and fucking Cullen, and probably that Jasper bitch too, would probably be at my door within minutes. If she was going to be completely uncooperative, I needed time to plan.

But she wasn't breaking it off completely. She wanted to be friends. She wanted to keep our relationship on life support until she was ready for something more. I could fucking do that. I could be patient.

I just had to wait for her to get her shit together, and then we could date. If we were friends, I could still see her often and we could still hang out. Her claims for dating being too much for her would keep her out of Cullen's hands. It could all be handled, all be remedied. With patience. After all, I had an endless supply of that shit.

Finally, I looked back up to her eyes. She was biting her lower lip nervously, watching my every movement. I reached across the table and took her hand, squeezing it reassuringly.

"If that is what you want," I said, which made her smile just a little, and it took all my might not to be pissed that she was happy it was ending. "I would like to remain friends, though." I made sure that this was a stipulation, because if not, none of this was going to be fucking acceptable.

She nodded her head quickly a few times and her smile grew as she released her lip. "I would love that."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I went back to the bar that we had met at that fateful night, seventy-three days ago. I was feeling fucking nostalgic, and a little bit masochistic.

I stood in the spot I had been in when I saw her for the first time. I had known from that instant she had to be mine, and as I drank until I was sure there was more alcohol in my blood than actual blood, I promised myself that it hadn't changed.

She was still fucking _mine_.

If anyone else tried to get near her, tried to worm their way into her life, or god help me in her bed, I would end them. It wouldn't be fast, either. I would snatch them in their sleep and let them suffer days, peeling each fingernail off with pliers while I explained to them their mistake.

And that would only be the beginning.

Bella POV

I threw my car into park, sprang out of my door and bounded up the two steps that led to Emmett and Rosalie's house.

My first official break-up had gone better than I could have imagined. I didn't fumble all over myself or sound like an emotional retard, and James was completely understanding and a gentleman. It had gone perfectly.

Not to mention it made me feel lighter somehow. It wasn't that James was an overbearing guy, sure he had his moments where he practically peed on me to mark his territory in front of Edward, but all in all he had been a nice guy. He didn't overstay his welcome and was endlessly patient.

Still, I felt free. And grown up.

I knocked on the door and then waited, rocking back and forth on my heels and looking around. I was practically buzzing.

Finally Em opened the door with his ever-present smile. "'Bout time you showed up," he said, wrapping an arm around my shoulders and pulling me into the house. "Rosie is just finishing up."

We walked into the kitchen and found Rosalie in her apron stirring something a big, steel pot with a wooden spoon. I had helped her learn to cook shortly after she and Em married, showing her the basics and some of Em's favorites. She took to it easily and insisted on the apron, saying it made her feel more the part.

"Hey Rosalie," I said, walking up and looking in her pot. "Smells good."

"Oh, it's just a stew I threw together. I was craving some soup, with it being fall and all," she said.

"Sounds good to me."

"Me too," Emmett said as he grabbed bowls and spoons to set the table. I grabbed three cups from the cabinet and started putting ice in them, trying not to skip across the kitchen with all the energy I had.

"What's with you?" Emmett asked. He had paused in the middle of setting down a plate to look at me curiously.

"I'm in a good mood," I said, opening the freezer door to get ice.

"Oh yeah? What for?"

"I had a very healthy break-up," I told him. "My first, too."

"With James?" he said, finally putting the plate down.

"Yes."

"I saw that one coming," Rosalie added quietly from the stove.

I only shrugged then proceeded to pour sweet tea into the glasses. "It wasn't going anywhere, for me anyway."

"How did he take it?" Emmett asked.

"Actually, he was amazing. He said he understood and even agreed to staying friends."

Emmett was quiet after that. I finally looked up from my task and saw him watching me closely.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing. It's just… he didn't get upset or anything?" Emmett asked, his eyebrows closing in on one another.

"No," I said slowly, confused as to why this was weird to him. "I don't think he wanted things to end, but he handled it with class."

Rosalie filled the bowls and placed them on the table as we sat down.

"Huh. Well, good for you then."

"What's going on?" I asked him. "Why do you seem so surprised?"

"Well," he paused, seeming hesitant, but then went on, "I was talking with Mills, this guy on patrol who hangs with all the detectives, I think his brother works over there or something, and he was talking about what a loose canon James was. Told me I needed to keep an eye on him around you."

"James? Really?"

Emmett nodded. "Guy said the other day he was walking around his desk and just knocking things off for no reason. Said he has quite the temper."

The temper I could believe, but the unnecessary violence?

"That doesn't seem like the James I know," I said, shaking my head.

Emmett shrugged. "Well, I guess if you two are calling it quits then everything should be alright. But if he gives you any grief, Bells, you better tell me."

"Sure," I said, still confused about the James that Em's friend had described. I couldn't imagine James throwing things or letting his temper get the best of him too often. It didn't make sense to me.

I decided to let it drop, because as Emmett had mentioned, we were just friends now. I smiled again.

It wasn't until dinner was over that I realized I had yet to hear Emmett swear. The realization almost hit me so hard that I would surely have a bruise.

"Emmett, has Rosalie finally gotten you to watch your language?" I asked him, shocked. It was not anything like Emmett to change his ways.

He smiled impishly and nodded.

"How in the world?" I wondered aloud as I walked toward their front door.

Rosalie frowned and scrunched her perfect little nose. "I told him if he gave it up I wouldn't find out what the baby was. I never thought for a minute it would work so well," she scowled.

I laughed. "It's better this way," I assured her. "This way you both get something you want."

Rosalie rolled her eyes and gave me a playful shove toward the door. "You sound just like him sometimes, you know that?" She turned and walked back into the house.

Emmett was grinning widely, and once he was sure she was out of earshot, leaned down to me to whisper, "It's a good thing she doesn't hear me talk at work."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I ran my hand through my hair only to get it caught again in the messy bun/knot on top of my head that I claimed as a hair-do when I was running late. Ignoring Edward and his amused smile as he watched me from the dining room, leaning nonchalantly against the wall, I flipped the cushions of the couch up and back down before moving over and searching the chair.

My cell phone was missing, and I was late for work.

I ran back to my room and looked on my desk for the third time; it still hadn't appeared there either. I turned to my bed and slung my pillows out of the way, searching the covers by the headboard with my hands. Feeling no lumps, I gave up on my room again.

I huffed and puffed under my breath as I stormed into the dining room and scattered the bills and miscellaneous papers that lay on one end of the table. Finally Edward spoke up.

"What are you looking for?" he asked, and even without seeing his face I could tell he was smiling.

"My phone," I almost growled. "I have to be at work in five minutes and it takes at least ten to get there."

"Twenty in that beast of yours," he quipped.

I rolled my eyes and walked speedily to the kitchen, quickly searching the counter tops and even behind the toaster. I didn't know why I thought it might be there, but decided it couldn't hurt to look since it didn't seem to be anywhere else.

"Here," Edward said from behind me, "I'll call it."

Agreeing that it was probably the fastest way to find it, I nodded quickly and stepped back out into the dining room, hoping it would allow me to hear it from wherever it was in the apartment. Oh _god, I hope it's in the apartment!_ Edward reached into his pocket and fished out his phone, which looked more like a mini computer than a cell phone. He pushed a few buttons and then held it to his ear.

The traitorous device rang then, from the living room. My relief of having found it was only a fraction of a second. I listened with horror as Peter, Paul and Mary crooned one of their biggest hits, and I felt like I was in slow motion as I turned toward it. I sprinted into the living room, although it felt more like waltz, only to snag the toe of my shoe in the carpet and go flying down into the floor. I landed on the palms of my hands near the couch, but luckily noticed the ringing was coming from underneath the furniture, and to cover my gracelessness I pretended as if I had dived to the ground on purpose and reached for the phone.

Once it was in my hand I pressed any button I could reach that would cease the ringtone that had been assigned to Edward and Edward alone, the one that had now embarrassed me on more than one occasion. It was only after it stopped that blood began rushing to my chest and face at an alarming rate. I briefly worried what my limbs would do for oxygen.

I took my time standing up without bothering to raise my head completely and darted for the door. I waved the hand that held the phone in pitiful thanks and closed the door behind me.

* * *

_All my bags are packed_

_I'm ready to go_

_I'm standing here outside your door_

_I hate to wake you up to say goodbye_

_But the dawn is breakin'_

_It's early morn_

_The taxi's waitin'_

_He's blowing his horn_

_Already I'm so lonesome_

_I could die_

_So kiss me and smile for me_

_Tell me that you'll wait for me_

_Hold me like you'll never let me go_

_I'm leavin' on a jet plane_

_I don't know when I'll be back again_

_Oh, babe, I hate to go_

Leaving on a Jet Plane ~ Peter, Paul & Mary

**Soooooooo…. review and tell me what ya think! Are you relieved that James and Bella ended things? Or are you a little more nervous now? Let me know!**

**Also, I have this tiny lil thread over at Twilighted. I would love it if some of you guys came over to chat. Link is in my profile.**


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: SM owns all things Twilight. I own a baby bump.**

**Thanks to my beta - herinfiniteeyes - for being just generally awesome. She listens to me whine about not only this story but real life too. **

**See bottom for further notes/apologies. **

"Why, good morning, Jasper," I smiled as I ran into him in the hallway just outside my bedroom door. It was 9:00 a.m., and he was wearing wrinkled, thin cotton pants and a t-shirt, clearly overnight attire, as he rolled his eyes at me. "Did you finally grow a pair and stay over with Alice's big brother here?" I smirked.

He made a fake-amused face in return, wherein his upper lip pulled up slightly before he turned and jetted down the hall before ducking into my bathroom. I tried to run after him, but my legs were no match for his lanky, army-trained limbs. He slammed the bathroom door closed behind him and I heard the distinctive sound of the lock twist.

"Jasper Hale, that is MY bathroom! Get out!" I yelled as I repeatedly banged my fists on the closed door.

"Sorry Bells, but you share your bathroom with the entire apartment, and since this is the only one currently available… I think I'll use it."

"UGH!" I shouted and stomped, apparently acting out the complete kid sister part he was treating me as.

"Would you look at that, I do have a pair!" he mused loudly from behind the door.

"Gah, I hate you!" I said loudly to the door before turning and walking away. The kitchen quickly came into sight and in it stood a very amused looking Edward.

"Troubles?" he grinned, looking flawless as usual, almost enough to make me forget I had to pee.

"Nothing I haven't had to deal with before," I said as I walked in.

As soon as my eyes could really appreciate the gloriousness that was his face, I noticed the disastrous mess behind him. It was as if a bomb had been dropped in my kitchen. Pots and pans were strewn about the stove, bowls filled with a creamy white batter with stray drops running down the sides, spatulas, whisks and plates littered the counter, and to top it off smoke was filtering up from what looked to be a charcoal pancake. I could feel how impossibly wide my mouth was hanging open. "What in the world?"

Edward suddenly looked down in surprise at the stove in front of him. He quickly tried to scrape the item from the bottom of the pan while he grumbled what I was almost positive was an expletive.

I looked from the pan to his face in amusement. Edward Cullen was _bad_ at something. The thought made me smile despite the huge mess in the kitchen that would have normally had me going crazy.

He picked up the pan and emptied it over the trash, scraping it while ashes floated down. A laugh finally bubbled up and out of me.

He turned to look at me, a scowl etched on his perfect face that did not take away from its beauty in the least. "Don't laugh at me." The scowl was quickly transforming into a pout.

"Sorry. It's just that I can't believe I found something I do better than you."

"Well, you can have cooking. I don't see why anyone bothers," he complained, taking the pan to the sink and running it under hot water.

His foul mood was cracking me up. I laughed out loud again.

He ignored me that time as he started scrubbing his pan. "I don't see how you enjoy cooking. There are too many things going on at once and too many mistakes that are way too easy to make, not to mention the mess when it is all over."

"If you are so anti-cooking, why did you attempt it this morning?" I asked.

His scrubbing faltered and picked up again, a bit less aggressive this time. Was his skin pink?

"I was actually trying to butter you up a bit," he finally admitted, never taking his eyes from the pan.

I bit my lip to keep it from curving up. I was always buttered around him.

"By making a giant mess in my kitchen?" I asked, the smile evident in my voice.

"I'll clean it all up," he promised.

"I know."

He was silent for a moment, making headway on the crispy layer coating the pan he had fried. Finally curiosity got the best of me.

"What were you 'buttering' me up for?"

"I need a favor."

"Okay," I hedged. "What is it?"

"I need a date."

I tried not to choke on my spit. "A date?" It came out strangled anyway.

"Yes. The President of my company is having a dinner tonight. He has them quite often because his wife loves to entertain, but since I travel so often I've always been out of town whenever one comes up. He's insisting I come, but I need someone to come with me."

Was he kidding? It would take a lot more than a breakfast for me to agree to something like that.

"I don't know. I'm not the right kind of girl for those types of events."

He finally looked up from the dishes to me and ignored my excuse. "I really don't want to go to this alone. No one goes alone. I would owe you big time." His perfect face and silky voice were making him impossible to deny.

"But I'll have to dress up, and wear heels, which means I'll trip, which means you'll never be able to show your face at work again…" I trailed off warningly.

"Nah," he smiled, and it was the kind of smile that made my knees threaten to melt. "You'll be fine."

"I don't know. I only have the one dress." Why was I letting him talk me into this?

"I could have Alice take you to get you something. My treat."

I shook my head. "No to both. I don't shop with Alice, and you aren't treating anyone."

His smile grew at my stubbornness. "I could have Alice pick you up something, without you being present, and I could go half on the dress." He started loading more dishes from his breakfast catastrophe into the sink. "Please Bella, I am begging you here. I can't show up alone."

I felt my resolve waiver, which only made me mad. Why was he so impossible to say no to? I opened my mouth to remind him that there was no need for me to go, since he was obviously more than able to find a willing girl anytime, anywhere, but I snapped it shut. The thought of some beautiful woman on his arm, charming the socks off his coworkers struck a chord of jealousy. I may not be able to have him, but it didn't mean I wanted to encourage his dating anyone else.

He watched my inner war with pleading eyes. I rolled mine.

"When is it?" I asked, my voice cautious.

"Tomorrow night. It starts at 6:00."

I thought for a moment before it dawned on me. "I have to work until 8:00."

"I'm sure someone would switch with you," he suggested.

I thought about it some more. As much as I didn't want to go, to do something so unnatural for me as this kind of thing, the thought of being at Edward's side all night as his date had me cracking. _I_ wanted to be the elegant woman charming his coworkers.

"I'll see what I can do about work, but I'm not making any promises."

"You're the best," he said, his smile more lopsided than ever.

After clocking in that afternoon at work, I went to the clipboard on the wall with everyone's schedule. I quickly scanned the list of everyone working the next day, hoping to find someone with an earlier shift who was friendly enough to change with me last minute.

Amy and Tiffany had morning hours. The schedule had Tiffany working today, leaving any minute, so I went to track her down. She was behind the counter dealing with video returns and from her face I could tell she had endured a long day.

I walked up to where she was struggling with the large stack of DVDs and started helping wordlessly. We hadn't spoke much in the past, being that the library was full of needy students at any given time, but I knew that she was a sophomore majoring in Journalism.

"Thanks," she said under her breath. "I can't wait to get out of here."

"I'm just coming on. I'll finish up," I told her, my own attempt at buttering. If I knew better I would not be trying so hard to get out of work. I would use it as an excuse to save myself some embarrassment.

"Great, thanks," she said with a friendly smile and turned toward the time clock.

"Actually, could I ask a favor?" She spun back to face me, her face still pleasant. "I need tomorrow evening off. Could you switch shifts with me?"

Her eyes flitted upward while she thought for a quick moment, but then she shrugged. "No, I don't mind."

I smiled despite myself. "I appreciate it."

She shrugged again before turning to leave.

When I got home from work that evening, feeling very tired and covered in book dust, Alice was waiting at the dining room table.

"Finally," she breathed. She stood quickly and pulled me to down the hall to her room. "Now, before you freak out, I will take whichever ones you don't want back, but since you refused to come with me, I had to have at least three options." We turned into her room and she sat me down on the bed. Hanging in front of her open closet were three dresses in solid garment bags.

She made a big show out of unzipping them one at a time.

"This one," she explained as she unveiled it, "is the one you should wear."

I gawked, because there was no way I was even trying it on. It was a navy blue, skin-tight dress, not to mention short and strapless. Even as naïve as I was to work functions, I was pretty sure dresses like that were only appropriate for very slinky clubs.

She didn't even wait for me to refuse it before moving on to the next one. "This one is a little more conservative, but a little more formal," she displayed a long, flowing silver gown, and while it was beautiful, it was not anymore appropriate than the first. Did Edward tell her where we were going? Surely she didn't really expect me to wear any of this in front of his coworkers.

She read my face for a millisecond and moved to the last one. I crossed my fingers, because it was either this or the lone dress I owned in my closet that still had not been dry-cleaned from the night it was soaked in the rain.

"And this one," she said in a deflated voice, "will be the boring one you pick." She unzipped the bag before removing the dress completely. And she was right. It was a little dressier than anything I had ever worn, but it would be perfect. Had she brought home the others just to scare me into this one?

The dress was very light teal with a faint white pattern on it that could only be seen close up. It was calf-length and loose with long sleeves, making it look young and flirty but still formal enough for an adult party.

When I looked to her she was smiling. "You did well. Thank you, Alice."

"You're welcome," she beamed, but then ruined the entire moment by bringing out the matching shoes and clutch.

As amazing as I knew the dress was, I still felt like an idiot as I tried to talk myself into leaving my room. Edward was waiting ever so patiently in the dining room so we could leave, but every time I started for the door my knees would buckle.

The dress was perfect, but who was I fooling thinking I could make it work? Alice had already been in three times to assure me I was more than capable of pulling the look off. I had even curled my hair a bit, making big, loose waves that Alice had pinned back on one side.

I was sitting on the side of my bed gripping the thick quilt that covered it when she knocked again. I mumbled for her to come in without looking up, trying to look deep down within myself and find any courage I could muster up.

"Hey there," a voice not belonging to Alice said from the doorway. I looked up pathetically at Edward, feeling like a giant wimp.

He looked amazing. He wore navy slacks and a matching jacket that hung open, his dark gray shirt underneath left unbuttoned at the top with no tie. I could tell he tried to do something different with his hair, but ended up as the same rusty mess on top of his head. He ran his fingers through it as I examined him.

If only we could all be so pretty and never even try.

"You look beautiful," he said, his eyes traveling over me.

I looked down nervously and bit my lip. "Thanks."

He was quiet while he waited until I finally looked back up and met his eyes. "Ready?"

No.

"I guess." I stood even though my mind was telling me to stay planted on the bed, but it was nearly impossible to deny him anything.

We rode silently in his Volvo most of the way there. It wasn't until we turned into an ungodly neighborhood full of Seattle's elite housing that he finally spoke up.

"Don't be nervous," he glanced over at me. I rolled my eyes. That wasn't possible. "They're all really friendly, outgoing people. Most of them are our parents' age, so you just have to be yourself and everyone will love you."

My fake smile in reply was probably hideous, but he just shook his head once before turning into a long driveway and parking. I reached for my door handle but his hand on my arm stopped me.

"Wait," he simply instructed. He opened his own door and stepped out, briefly straightening his clothing before slamming it shut behind him. Seconds later my door was opened, and his hand hung in mid air, palm up, waiting for mine.

I looked up and smiled, because even though I was posing as his "date" tonight, no one was out here with us. He wasn't pretending or keeping up a charade. This was just him being a gentleman.

I took his hand as I climbed out as gracefully as I could manage and he shut the door behind me. He slipped my hand around his elbow and led me toward the mansion in front of us.

It was amazing to be so close to him, to feel his body next to mine, to have his wonderful, Edwardy smell all around me, and to have this excuse to touch him. Maybe I would have to hang on him all night. For appearances, of course.

This was definitely turning out to be worth any humiliation the dress or my clumsiness would cost me.

Edward rang the bell to the front door, which was immediately answered by a man in a penguin suit who took our coats and held his hand out for us to proceed toward the party. Down a long hall was a double doorway, the doors propped open, and fairly visible was the room where the party was obviously being held. I could already hear the echo of voices and laughter from the area and see people standing or walking by the open entryway.

Edward guided me confidently down toward the room. I tried to steal some of his suaveness, anything to make me not look like such an idiot next to him, but I failed miserably.

Just as we entered, and as many eyes glanced up to see who had arrived, I tripped on my heels. My body lurched forward, and if it hadn't been for my grip on Edward's arm I probably would have gone full out and fell completely. There was nothing on the floor I could blame, just my own feet. I felt like I would throw up.

Everyone around seemed to smile and overlook it, continuing with their conversations and my breath rushed out as I looked up at Edward.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered, eyes wide, hoping my ears weren't as red as they felt. He would hate me forever if I did something to embarrass him tonight. But he just smiled and shrugged, and I vowed that would be the worst of it.

Edward led us further into the room before eventually heading over to the beverage table. "Wine?" he asked with his eyebrow raised. He knew I was under age, but probably thought I could use something to take the edge off.

I nodded and took it from him. It would either make it better, or tons worse, and I figured why not.

The party was full of mostly middle-aged people, just as Edward had promised. I looked around the room as I sipped my wine, noticing how sophisticated everyone looked and acted. I laughed inwardly, thinking briefly about how the night would have gone if I had worn the first dress Alice had brought home for me. Everyone seemed so reserved and conservative, and I could picture exactly how all of their eyes would pop from their sockets had I walked in dressed in the short, tight dress.

After a glass of liquid courage, Edward placed his hand on the small of my back, making me shiver quite noticeably, and walked us up to a couple who looked to be in their sixties with matching salt and pepper hair. Edward whispered "my boss" in my ear just before we reached them and they turned to greet us.

"Mr. and Mrs. Muncy," Edward said smoothly, his voice more even and silky than I had ever heard it. I had to bite my tongue to keep from shivering again.

"Edward," Mr. Muncy smiled a very toothy grin as he shook his hand firmly. "I can't tell you how thrilled I am that you made it tonight. Sus, you remember Edward?" he turned to her.

"Of course," she said, her voice soft and sweet. "It's been too long," she scolded half-heartedly before he leaned down to give her a brief hug.

When she pulled away, she looked over to me and smiled maternally. "Edward, who is this lovely lady you've brought with you?"

"This is Bella Swan," he said, his hand slightly pressing on my back, encouraging me.

"Mrs. Muncy," I said, even though it hardly sounded like my voice, and took her hand.

"Susan," she corrected with a smile. I turned toward Edward's boss and held out my hand again.

"Bella. I'm so glad you could join us tonight," he shook my hand softly once. I smiled and nodded, then stood silently as Edward and his boss made small talk. Even though I had barely spoken, I was elated I hadn't made a fool of myself in front of Edward's boss.

But as the night went on, I proved myself right for worrying that I could behave as such.

Edward had pulled me over to a small group of people and introduced them all one by one even though I forgot each of their names as soon as it came out of his mouth. One gentleman from that group took an unwarranted interest in me, which caught me off guard.

"So Bella, are you from Seattle?" he asked. His question was simple, but my nerves were eating away at me from the inside and all I could do was shake my head "no." He waited for me to elaborate, his eyebrows high in expectation, but I choked on every word that tried to escape. My mouth did something similar to that thing fishes do when trying to breath air. Finally he nodded somewhat sympathetically at Edward and changed the subject.

Later, Edward introduced me to an older lady named Betty who attempted to make small talk with me. When she turned to me, an obvious question on her lips, I swallowed my nerves and vowed to answer verbally this time.

"Tell me Bella, how did you and Edward meet?" Her wrinkled mouth pulled up into a sweet smile as she waited for my answer. She reminded me of my Grandma Swan.

"I woke up one morning with him in my bed," my voice said, even though my brain was trying to pull the words back in. My hand clamped over my mouth as I looked at her apologetically. "Well, I mean, nothing happened…," I stopped myself from inadvertently referring to sex in any way and tried again. "See, I live with his sister and…"

She waved her hand at me, smiling a little. "That's ok dear. I know things work different now days."

I opened my mouth to explain again, but decided not talking at all was better than trying to make myself sound anywhere near intelligent tonight. I looked up to Edward, afraid he would be angry or looking at me like I was slow or berating himself for bringing a half-wit to something as important as this, but he was just smiling again. Maybe he did think I was slow. Maybe he was taking me out tonight for some sort of outreach program. Surely he wasn't really attracted to me, to my idiocy and stuttering and tripping.

Eventually everyone took a seat at one of the many tables that were set up in a large dining area, and Edward and I sat with another couple who only seemed about ten years older than us. I discovered that they were sweet and friendly as Edward chatted with them, and I was grateful they seemed to be willing to let me just smile and nod along quietly.

More men in penguin suits appeared and started delivering food. I kept myself from cringing as I watched caviar being scooped onto my plate - the stuff seriously creeped me out. But I wasn't sure what to do with it. I stared at it, somewhat horrified, debating whether to push my plate away or just ignore it. Maybe Edward would eat it. He could eat his and then switch plates with me. I looked over at him hopefully.

Instead, he grinned impishly and said, "Try it." I watched as he placed some on a cracker and put it gracefully in his mouth as I gaped at him. As he chewed and swallowed I managed to shake my head side to side slowly. No way was I eating that.

"Come on, Bella. It's fun to try new things," he encouraged.

I looked down at the fish eggs. Nothing about them seemed fun. I looked back up at him.

"If you try this, I won't make you try sushi," he bartered. I looked back to the food. It did seem better than raw fish. I mean, I ate chicken eggs, right?

I sighed and glanced over at the couple sharing our table. They were watching raptly, completely aware of what was going on. I smiled shyly at them.

I picked up a cracker and placed a considerably less amount of caviar on it than Edward had put on his and raised it to my mouth. I gave him one more doubtful look before I took a bite.

It was awful. Worse than I had even imagined. My mouth watered excessively and I automatically gagged. Luckily I managed to keep my mouth shut and forced it down since there wasn't anywhere I could spit it out without drawing everyone's attention. I quickly grabbed my water and downed the entire glass. I could see Edward's shoulders shaking in laughter while I let one of the ice cubes in my mouth and crunched on it.

"That was not funny," I said, narrowing my eyes at him. "That was terrible. Do you really like that stuff?"

He regained some of his composure and wiped one of his hands across his face. "Sure," he smiled with a shrug. "It's different, but I like things that are different, that have a distinct taste."

I just shook my head at him.

Luckily, I managed to get through the rest of the night without humiliating Edward or myself any further. Edward was buoyant the entire way home, which rubbed off on me, and we both laughed at my ridiculous behavior and everything that had happened.

When we got back to the apartment, he grabbed my arm before I could rush back to my room.

"I have to walk you to your door," he told me. I didn't argue with him. If he wanted to keep up the date charade, that was fine with me. I let him lead me back down the short hall to my bedroom door. When we stopped I opened the door and took a small step in before turning around. He leaned on my doorframe, his forearm propping him up as he smiled at me. Suddenly I felt my stomach erupt in butterflies.

"Thanks for taking me tonight. Sorry I wasn't able to charm all your co-workers," I joked only slightly, looking down to study and pick at my nails. "At least you know better for next time."

His hand came up under my chin and lifted it until our eyes met. His thumb swept back and forth in small smoothing strokes against my skin. Tingles spread over my entire face.

"Thank you for coming with me," he said sincerely before a smile broke out onto his face. "You truly made this night memorable for me."

I smiled, because it would be memorable for me, too.

He took me by surprise as he leaned down just an inch, pausing to gauge my reaction. My eyes widened and my breath caught in my throat making my brain fuzzy from the lack of oxygen. Slowly he leaned the rest of the way in, and let his soft lips brushed lightly against mine once before pulling away.

"Goodnight," he whispered, and then turned and headed down the hall towards his couch.

**So… Yay? Worth the wait? Or trying to figure out why in the world you were sending me all those lovely pms in anticipation? **

**Thanks to all of you for caring about my well being and this story enough to keep checking in on me. I am feeling better, just still having trouble staying awake after my kiddos go to bed, which is when I usually like to write. I promise to keep my… er, promise, though. I will finish the story!**

**James returns in the next chapter, but for those of you who like ya a little creeper J check out my new Outtaky-thing for this story, called "Outtakes of a Practical Nature." It has my Support Stacie Auction story (yeah, the one from back in September *hangs head in shame*), which ended up being a 5k one shot from James' POV. I hope to add more outtakes to it in the future.**

**But first, tell me what ya thought!! I went for the "klutzy Bella stays in character and fails to impress Edward's colleagues" instead of the ever popular "klutzy Bella magically turns into bell of the ball and automatically impresses everyone."**

**So did it work? Or did my attempt at humor have you laughing for all the wrong reasons? ;) **


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: SM owns Twilight and everything you recognize. **

**My super beta, herinfiniteeyes, beta'd this super fast for me and made it all pretty. I don't know what I would do without her.**

**Please make sure to read my note at the end.**

James POV

Normally, I hate crowds. Not dislike, hate. I hate when a bunch of people are all together and bumping into one another and pushing and shoving. Put a group of people in a small area and they start acting like bunch of untamed animals.

It was always crowded in the school library. Pushy students filled every aisle, murmuring to themselves about a book's unavailability or trash talking a fellow classmate or teacher. There was one good thing about the crowd in the library, though. They made it easy for me to blend in.

For instance, I could easily walk up to the area beside the front desk where they kept the employee schedule and review it without anyone caring whatsoever. As along as I didn't bang my fist on the desk next to me and demand help, no one ever gave me even a courtesy glance.

I let my finger drag over the dusty book spines in my aisle while I smiled to myself. I was going to see my Bella. I had waited until the end of her shift purposely, planning on running into to her. She would know why I was here of course, it wasn't like I was a student. But it had been a week and a half since we started our break, and I needed to make contact. I needed to make sure there was still room for me in her life. Because if there wasn't…

No. She said we would be friends. I was here as a friend, just catching up. I bet she would be glad to see me. She probably missed me. I figured she probably felt weird about making the first move after everything, or she would have called me by now. So I would make the first move.

I glanced at my watch. 7:55 p.m. She would be off in 5 minutes. I hadn't seen her yet, but that meant nothing. She was probably in one of the back rooms where they stored certain items, and if not, the library itself was big enough to get lost in. I started making my way toward the reception desk, knowing that she would pass by before she clocked out.

As usual, I leaned up against a tall book of shelves and waited without anyone noticing. Were people really so self-involved that they did not notice someone just standing here? Someone out of place? I couldn't imagine being so simple-minded that I would miss out on all the things going on around me. I shook my head in disbelief.

When eight minutes had passed and Bella had still not made her way up front, I began to worry. I shifted my weight to my other foot, trying not to look too impatient in case she rounded one of the many corners at any moment. It was normal to be caught up in something and be a couple of minutes late.

But then eight minutes turned into 15, and I knew something was up. I swept the lobby area quickly once more for her, then pushed myself away from the book shelve that had been supporting me and made my way toward the clipboard. Had she called in sick? I hadn't thought to check her apartment for her truck before I came out here. Apparently I _was_ as stupid as the rest of them.

The schedule was different. I had checked it two days ago and I was sure of Bella's shift this evening, but there was a line marked threw her name with "Tiffany" written in pencil above it. I quickly scanned up to Tiffany's name on today's schedule and saw she had originally had the morning shift today, but a line was now through her name as well, with "Bella" written over it.

I had missed her.

Bella had worked and left already. She switched her hours with Tiffany. But had Bella needed the evening off or had Tiffany needed the morning off? I swallowed thickly as I thought of the reason Bella might need an evening off, which sounded much more likely.

I took a quick step back from the clipboard as my temper soared.

Maybe she had made plans with Alice. Or Emmett. Or anyone but Edward. I slowly continued to step away from the front desk and in the direction of the front door. Images flashed through my mind before I could stop them: Edward and Bella out having dinner, Edward and Bella dancing at a bar, or holding hands at the Sound, having to stay close because it was getting colder out…

No.

I barely kept myself from running to the door and to my car. I made short work of getting from the school to Bella's apartment, where her truck stood rusting away. And where Edward's prissy shiny Volvo was gone.

This didn't mean she was out with him. This only meant that Edward was gone. Bella could be inside. Alice's car was gone as well. Maybe she was with her. I tried to think of any possibility other than what I knew in my gut.

She was with him.

I worked on my breathing techniques while I waited, removing my hands from the steering wheel and letting them clench in my lap instead. If I broke another steering wheel, the department would start asking questions.

If they were out together, I definitely needed a new plan. I couldn't continue to be the "friend" she rarely spoke to while Cullen moved in on her. I needed to reestablish my place in her life as soon as possible. I could only hope that I hadn't completely fucked myself by allowing this break. If they came back together holding hands, I didn't know that I would be able to stay in the car.

It wasn't until almost midnight that his car came rolling back into the parking lot. I tried to tether myself as best as I could to the seat of the car; I wasn't sure what I would do if she was touching on him or even worse, he was touching her.

I watched as my fears were confirmed as he walked over to the passenger side of his car and a leggy brunette stepped out. My Bella, my sweet girl, was dressed to kill in some bluish color dress with a matching purse and high heel shoes. Her hair was curled. She was smiling. And he was guiding her by the small of her back.

I managed to wait until they were in the lobby before I tore out of the parking lot. I passed all the familiar turns. I just needed a highway that would take me as far away as possible before I actually killed Edward Cullen.

~*~

Bella POV

I bit down on my pen cap, my professor's lecture just a background noise in my head. I couldn't stop thinking of the ridiculously innocent, feathery kiss Edward and I had shared two nights ago. It was soft and sweet and nothing like our other kiss, but I couldn't keep it off my mind. Was it because it was calculated and purposeful when the other was just a moment of weakness? Was it because the next day we kept grinning like idiots whenever our eyes met?

The huge white board behind my teacher served as a nice big screen where I watched over and over again the way he had leaned into me right before his lips met mine.

This was getting out of control. Since when did I not pay attention in school? And why was I letting this kiss mean something? Things had not changed. Edward's job had certainly not changed. But nonetheless, here I was, stupid 19-year-old naïve Bella swooning during class over an unattainable guy.

I rolled my eyes inwardly, pulled my massacred pen from my mouth and tried to refocus my thoughts. I sat up straighter in my seat and directed my eyes to the teacher instead of the movie screen. I had spent the entire day yesterday analyzing Edward, the kiss, and my stupidity and today I needed to be a student.

Just as I was feeling like I was catching up on my notes, something else distracted me. Something black flashed by the door that stood just to the right of my professor. I glanced over, not sure why the movement had caught my eye. There was a small window in the door and it certainly wasn't abnormal for people to walk down the hall during our class, but the form had moved so fast… and seemed a lot closer to the door than people normally walked.

I watched the door, curious to see if it happened again, but it didn't. When class was done I was sure I had only heard about a third of the entire lecture.

As class was dismissed, I gathered up my things and waited until most of the class had left before I got up. It was a habit I'd made on my first day of college, being that I had to descend stairs to get out of most of my classrooms. I found it was much easier to do if I wasn't competing with everyone else in the class.

I kept my head down as I passed my teacher, embarrassed about my daydreaming. I was sure he hadn't noticed as big as the class was, but I was feeling slightly guilty. I made a silent vow to erase Edward from my head for the rest of the day. Or at least until I got to work.

I walked out the classroom door and turned left, my head still slightly bowed, when I ran into something hard. My head snapped up and I stepped back, apology on my tongue left hanging as I looked up at a smiling… James?

"I'm sorry," I finally got out. "I didn't see you there." Why was James at UW?

He smiled and threw his arm around me and started walking me in the direction I had been headed.

"That's alright. I wanted to surprise you."

"Mission accomplished. What's the reason for your visit?" I asked as I looked over to him.

"I just wanted to see you. I know you wanted to take a break and everything, but I do still want to be friends and it feels like it has been forever since I've seen you. Do you maybe want to go get a coffee after your classes?"

I bit my lip as I tried to think it over quickly. I didn't mind getting coffee with him, as long as he was honestly okay with the "friends" part of the deal. I knew deep down he still wanted more and I was reluctant to encourage him.

"Maybe tomorrow," I told him. "I only have about 45 minutes between my last class and my shift at the library and I need to do a little studying."

"Alright, tomorrow works," he accepted easily. I looked up and realized we were walking into the building where my next class was. Had I guided us here… or did he know my class schedule? He must know it somewhat, to have known which class to wait outside of and the time we got out. I tried to remember giving him my schedule.

"Meet you at the little shop down the street from your place?" he asked, interrupting my thoughts. Did he mean the place where we broke up? Why would he want to go there?

"That works, I guess. See you there tomorrow afternoon."

He stopped me in front of my classroom and gave me a quick hug. He must have been on duty because he was wearing his suit along with a long, black trench coat that I thought only gave him away even more. James definitely looked the part of a detective, whether he meant to or not.

"See you then," he said before he turned and walked away.

**

I felt horrible about it, but I spent most of my work shift and then throughout most of dinner trying to find a way out of coffee with James the next day. I had been honest with him when I told him I wanted to stay friends. It wasn't like he still wasn't the same guy I had spent the last couple of months with, but for some reason the thought of going somewhere with him stayed in the forefront of my mind.

I hadn't realized I had brooded my way through most of my Chinese take-out until Jasper finally flung a chop stick at my head.

I flinched as I pulled myself from my thoughts and then managed to give him a dirty look. The "what the hell?" was implied.

"What is up with you today? You look all pensive," Jasper said as he opened a new set of chopsticks.

"Nothing, just a lot on my mind."

"Like what?" Alice asked, her eyes quickly darting from my face to Edward's and back. I took the liberty of looking at Edward too, to see why Alice had been checking him out, but he was looking back at me. He seemed to be wondering about my distractive mind too.

I looked back across the table to Alice and shrugged. No reason I couldn't tell them what had my brain working overtime. "I ran into James today."

Alice and Jasper's eyes both widened slightly. I didn't turn to where Edward sat next to me to check his expression. I already knew he and James did not like me seeing the other in any manner.

"I told him we could grab a cup of coffee tomorrow, but I guess I still feel weird about seeing him now that we aren't together anymore. I have been trying to come up with an excuse since I made the date." I frowned at the word 'date' even though it had come out of my own mouth.

"Bella, if you don't want to go, then just cancel. You don't need an excuse," Alice said, her tone a little too serious. Had Edward told her about all the things we had talked about?

"I know, but he wants to be friends, and really I'm okay with that. I can't put my finger on why I don't want to go. Coffee is innocent enough," I shrugged again.

When no one said anything for a moment I finally looked up. They all seemed to want to say something, but they weren't sure how. I shook my head. "Guys, it's no big deal. It will only be half an hour. I'll live."

No one brought it up again after that, and after we had finished dinner I decided to get my mind on other things. Like studying. It was badly needed due to my inability to concentrate as of late, and more importantly, a good excuse to avoid Edward. Even though I knew he would have liked to have given me his two cents on the issue of seeing James again, he didn't interrupt me. I wasn't sure if it was due to my homework or that Alice and Jasper had hung around, but either way I was almost glad. I needed to start thinking clearer again and Edward seemed to fog everything up. It was a good fog, but murky nonetheless.

**

The next day passed quickly. I did somewhat better with my attentiveness during class, even though I couldn't help if from time to time I thought back to the night before and regretted avoiding Edward. He had snuck out early this morning and I hadn't really had the chance to see him the day before, except from the corner of my eye. I made a mental vow to always make sure I got a good look at him everyday he was around. Sadly, I never knew when he might be away again.

I sent James a quick text as I climbed in my truck after my last class to tell him I would be at the coffee house in a few minutes. He sent one back saying he was running a bit behind, but would be there shortly. This didn't bother me, in fact it would give me time to get a drink and settle in before having to face him.

I did just that, trying to talk down my butterflies over having this first post-break up conversation. I didn't know how to act. If I acted too happy, would I hurt his feelings? Or what if our break up or the reasons behind it served as some huge elephant making it impossible to act natural? Now that I was sitting with my drink in hand I was regretting the choice of caffeine. It was not helping my nerves.

A couple of minutes later, I caught the sight of James walking outside across the large glass windows that framed the little shop. I smiled slightly at the trench coat again, deciding I would tell him how much it gave him away. That would be a nice ice breaker, right?

I continued to watch as he walked to the door and entered the small but busy café, and as the door swung shut behind him, the long tail of his coat fluttered and whipped behind him as it caught the wind from the door. I had a moment of déjà vu, and my brain only partly processed that he had smiled and nodded before heading up to get in line for his own drink. Why had I had déjà vu? It could have been the frequency in which we were meeting here, but that didn't seem to make anything click in my head.

My head continued to sort through memories until James walked toward my table, his coat slightly flared out behind him. Suddenly my heart leapt into my throat.

His coat.

It was the flash of black I had seen outside the classroom door yesterday. I was almost positive now, even though I had no way of knowing for absolute certain or proving it. It did make sense, being that he was waiting for me after the class. But I had seen the black flash a good 25 minutes before the end of my class. Had he waited in the hall all that time?

James must have noticed my calculating expression. "What's up?" His usual smile at seeing me fell slightly.

"Nothing," I said, probably a little too fast. I wasn't sure why, but knowing that he had been waiting for me, lurking the campus hallways while I was in class bothered me. It hadn't bothered me so badly yesterday. I had even let it slip my mind that he had known what class I was in and at what time. But now too many pieces were falling together.

How _did_ he know my schedule?

"Are you sure?" he asked, his head leaning down to try and catch my wondering eyes. "You seem almost… upset."

"No, no. I just had an idea, suddenly… about a paper."

"Ahh," he said, accepting my lie easily. "I should've known you would be worrying about school." His smile returned.

I nodded. I wasn't sure what to do. I wasn't sure how I felt about all of this. It wasn't normal for boyfriends to know school schedules, was it? I knew I had told him the names of the classes I was taking at one point, but never the teachers or buildings or times. So how did he know?

"So how have things been?" he asked, taking a careful sip from his cup.

"Fine. School is taking up a lot of time now. My workload is really starting to increase." I was on autopilot. I needed to leave, to get away so I could think.

"I'm sure it isn't too bad, not for you," he commented sweetly. He was trying to be sweet, but with all the thoughts roaming my head I could barely acknowledge the compliment.

"Yeah, no. It isn't too bad, but you know me. I like to make sure I've got everything done right." I made myself smile a little as I said it to not let on that I wasn't wholly into the conversation.

"Yeah, I know you," he said, and even though he said it jokingly, I caught something underlying in the statement. Was he implying something? That he knew me better than I thought? My stomach turned sour, making me wince.

"You okay?" he asked, seeming to notice my every movement. What was with this guy?

"I don't know," I finally answered, seeing my way out. "My stomach is bothering me a little. I probably shouldn't have gotten all this caffeine without something on my stomach first, I guess."

"Do you want me to go get you a bagel or something?" he offered, already poised to push back his chair to get up.

"No, it's fine. But I think I need to go home." I tried not to look at his face, I didn't want to see the disappointment I was sure was there at cutting our get-together short.

"Do you need a ride home?" he asked.

I still didn't look at him as I pushed my chair back and stood. "No, I'll be alright. I just need to go home and lie down for a while."

"Alright," he said, at which point I finally looked at him. He truly looked worried. "Rain check?"

"Sure," the word came out before I could stop it.

"Hope you feel better," he said as he walked by my side to the door, then followed me to my truck.

"Thanks," I said under my breath then drove away, leaving him behind. I didn't know how I would get out of the friendship agreement and the promise for a rain check, but as I watched him disappear in the rearview mirror I sincerely hoped that I never saw him again.

A shiver ran down my spine and shook my body. After all the things I had put together today, and the way I had felt all day yesterday about having to see him again, I knew in my gut that something was amiss with James.

I pulled out my phone and scrolled down my contacts. Out of all the names that were in there, I could only think of one person I wanted to talk to.

Edward.

**Yay! Bella finally gets a clue. If I had enough creativity to name each chapter that would be the name of this one. She still doesn't know the extent of James' shudder-worthy mind, but at least her brain got a little kick start here.**

**First, you all blew me anyway with your reviews last chapter. I was totally expecting my small following to have bailed on me by the time I came back, but you all kick ass. **

**Second, my little o story got a nom at the Indie TwiFic Awards for 'Best Secondary Characterization,' guessing for everyone's favorite Creeper James. I am stoked to just be nominated. The first round of voting is going on now, until March 2. The link is on my profile. Go vote!**

**Now, tell me what ya thought! **


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: SM owns Twilight. **

**So… hello. Remember me? Not so much? **

**Quick reminder: ****Bella is being stalked by Creeptastic James and has recently discovered his lurkdom out side her classes.**

**MAJOR thanks to herinfiniteeyes for having enough pity on me and betaing this chapter. I kinda love her. **

**Also, thanks to my new pre-reader kari. She is super sweet and helpful.**

**More info at the bottom about me/story. 'Til then.**

Chapter 20

It wasn't until the second ring that I realized I was calling Edward during office hours. He answered before I could consider bailing on the call.

"Hello?"

"Oh, um, hey, it's Bella. I'm sorry. I forgot all about you being at work before I called, and I shouldn't be bothering you, I'll just-"

"Bella, it's fine. You didn't interrupt anything," he said soothingly. "What's up?"

"It's actually really not even a conversation for the phone," I realized. "I just, I mean… I saw James and then all this stuff clicked and then I was calling you before I even thought it all the way through…" my rambling trailed off. It dawned on me suddenly that even though I was thankful that I could confide in him, I was blurring the boundaries between us yet again. Was this something you called your roommate's brother for _before_ your roommate, or your own brother even, who was a police officer?

The fact that Edward was trying to regain my attention on the other end of the phone finally registered with me.

"Bella, are you okay?" His voice was a notch above his usual calm velvet.

"Sorry. I'm fine. Why don't I just talk to you whenever you get home?"

He hesitated. "Are you sure you're okay? I can leave now," he offered.

"No, no. I'm alright, I promise." I faked a smile, glad he couldn't see it and call me out.

When Alice showed up shortly before Edward I decided to discuss everything with both of them and get two perspectives. Edward sat close to me on the couch, silent as he digested my story while Alice sat on the floor at my feet with wide eyes, like I was telling a ghost story to a second grader. I explained in depth my theory on James and how he somehow knew my school schedule and lurked outside my classes.

"Whoa, Bella, this guy sounds psycho... like stab-you-in-the-shower, psycho," Alice said, shaking her head and then shuddering.

"I don't know about that, but something is definitely off with him."

Edward's even-keel voice made my eyes snap from Alice's to his. "Do you want me to talk to him?"

"No!" I shook my head. Really, I just wanted to pretend none of it had happened. I never wanted to talk to or think about James again, but I knew that he would not let it end that way. He still wanted to be in my life, possibly in ways that frightened me. But more than anything, I didn't want Edward forced in the middle.

"I don't mind," he offered again, his voice still eerily even. "I would be polite and it would keep you from having to be anywhere close to him ever again." His eyes burned, giving away his calm facade.

"I know, but I don't think he'll let it go that easy. I'll have to face him eventually." I tried to think how long I could possibly get away with putting it off. "If he is as involved as he appears to be, he'll need closure. From me." I was extremely proud of my ability to sound so sure of myself as I said this, because my stomach was wreaking havoc in the meantime.

Edward shook his head. "I don't think you need to be anywhere near him. He has some issues, obviously, and you seeing him again isn't safe."

I pulled my lip between my teeth. As much as I agreed with him, I knew better. I knew James better.

"Just, do this for me," Edward bargained. "Don't call him, wait until he calls you. Tell him over the phone that you feel like friendship isn't an option anymore, and you need a clean break. If he has trouble accepting that, then I can talk to him…" he stopped when my eyes widened. I couldn't see how Edward didn't realize that him being involved in any way would only make things worse.

I had all but forgotten Alice sitting quietly at my feet, and when I looked down at her again her eyebrows had joined in the middle of her forehead as she looked from Edward, to me, and then back to Edward. I realized a beat too late that she was confused by how involved Edward seemed to be and how easily we were discussing this, certainly not like two people who were just merely acquainted with one another. She looked at me and a slow smile crept onto her face. I gave her a small shake of my head to discourage any ideas forming about the two of us and then turned back to Edward.

"Fine, I'll wait 'til he calls," I agreed to that and nothing else, then closed my eyes and tried to figure out when my life had become so dramatic.

I dropped my overnight bag on the floor of my childhood bedroom and fell face first into my comforter. Somehow it just smelled right, like home, even though I used the same detergent in my apartment as mom used here. I stayed face down and took deep, relaxing breathes.

After my tense conversation with Edward and avoiding Alice and the questions I could see hanging on the tip of her tongue, I decided the best medicine would be a weekend home. Dad was overly excited that I would be cooking tonight instead of mom; apparently since I had left for school "mom cooking" meant "mom nuking TV dinners."

Just months ago when I had been packing this room up, my only thoughts consisted of getting out of here and never looking back. Now, with just a short amount of "big city" living, I missed it like crazy. Sure, there was never-ending gossip and nothing to do on the weekends, but it was simple. Secure.

An hour later I drug myself downstairs and flopped lazily on the couch next to dad. He was watching a sports game. I didn't bother trying to watch long enough to find out which one, but it was so normal and comforting.

Mom, in preparation of her new role of "Grams," had taken up cross-stitching. A cloth bag full of threads, needles, and prints sat at her feet. She had reading glasses perched low on her nose, and her tongue peeked out from where it sat between her teeth as she worked on her third project for my niece or nephew. She had already completed a blanket and pillow case and was now on the matching curtains. She had a design theme of yellow (or "neutral" as she called it) flowers and ivy. I didn't have the heart to tell her there was no way Rose was putting any of this to use.

She was a young mother herself, having Emmett at the age of 20, and it seemed weird to think of her as a Grandma. But like everything else, she saw it as an adventure and did the first stereotypical thing she could find.

I closed my eyes and basked in the normalcy and peace of my home. As much as I really did love UW and Seattle and Alice and... other people I had met, I missed this. I wondered if I was really so homesick or if it was just the whole James mess making me miss it so much.

"So, Em tells me you're dating some cop?" Dad asked. There must be a commercial on.

"I was, dad. Not any more. And dating is kind of the wrong term anyhow." I stopped myself from saying anything else; no reason to elaborate.

"Well, if you have to date, I guess that would be your best choice."

I opened my eyes and turned my head towards him. "Dad, I'm not with him anymore. Never really was." Not to mention the fact that cop or no cop, he was starting to spook me.

He just shrugged, but by then we had mom's attention.

"What cop? I didn't hear about this."

I rolled my eyes. "I just said it wasn't anything. We went out a couple of times, now we're not. Nothing worth talking about." I really didn't want to be thinking about James. He was the reason for my retreat back home.

"But you did date him? Like a real boyfriend? Wouldn't that be your first relationship?"

"No, mom. He wasn't a boyfriend." I rolled my eyes. My nostalgia was turning on me fast. Luckily I heard my phone beep with a text message from up in my room. Thankful for the reprieve, I jumped up and dashed up the stairs like those girls who live for texting and have crazy-talented thumbs, even though I knew it would either be Alice or Emmett and probably not important.

I grabbed it from my bag and flipped it open. The message was from Alice as expected.

'What kind of car does James drive?'

I made a confused face at my phone's screen. Why would Alice be asking about his car? I sent her a message back.

'It's a navy, unmarked police car. Why?'

She responded with amazing speed. She had those crazy thumbs.

'I think he has been in our parking lot all day."

My eyes popped wide and my heart doubled its rate. What? Now he was camping outside my apartment? The blood pounding through my system made my already pitiful texting skills even poorer and I gave up and called her number.

She answered her phone with, "I know, right?"

I made a few sputtering sounds for half a minute before I finally choked out, "Are you sure?"

"Well, I was about seventy-five percent before I got you to confirm his car, now I'd say I'm more like, ninety…. eight percent."

"What? What is wrong with him? Why is he just sitting in my parking lot all day?" I could feel my panic rising up in my chest to choke me. Was it possible for your heart to beat this high in your throat?

"I don't know," Alice said, then lowered her voice to a whisper before adding, "but you should see Edward. He's pacing and muttering all these angry little phrases. He's pissed!"

"I'm pissed!" I shouted, then thought better and lowered my voice. No need to pique mom and dad's interest. "What should I do?"

"Nothing, Bella. You're fine. Just stay with your 'rents and we'll keep an eye on him. Edward said he'll come up with something." Alice seemed totally confident and satisfied with this fact.

Not me. "Alice, let me talk to him."

"Okay," she paused and turned her face away from the phone. "Edward, quit wearing a path in my hardwood and get over here. Bella wants to talk to you."

Edward was on the phone within seconds. "Bella, I knew it. I knew he was all wrong. He's been sitting out there since I got in hours ago. Don't worry though, I'm going to take care of this. Jasper and I are going to go down there and confront him, we're just trying to decide the best way-"

"No, Edward. Please don't confront him." That's all I needed, to worry about Edward and Jasper walking up to someone who is crazy enough to spend his entire day parked in front of my building.

"We have to do something, Bella. This is out of control. And it's not like we can call the cops!"

I had never heard Edward so worked up before. Of course, I had been worked up before I realized my job was to calm him down.

"Listen, let me call Emmett, he'll know the best way to handle this. Just please don't go down there. Like you said, he's a cop, and if something was to break out between the three of you and someone calls the police, who do you think they'll believe?"

I let that hang out there for a minute, listening to his even breathing. I could hear Alice and Jasper talking in the background; Alice was trying to reason with Jasper too.

"Fine," he finally relented, and all my pent up breath whooshed out of me. "But you have to call him right now. I can't promise how long I'll be able to stay up here and do nothing."

I was distracted while trying to put together a nice dinner for mom and dad. My mind kept wandering to Seattle and whether Edward had kept his promise to stay away from James.

Emmett had been just as fired up as Edward when I first called him, but after he calmed down he decided the best way to handle things would be to document everything. He told me to tell Edward and Alice to take time-stamped pictures of James' car in the lot, keep track of any time they saw him or his car, and for me to write an Affidavit of everything I had pieced together in my mind about him. Then we would take it to Court and file an Emergency Protective Order against him.

I looked down at the chicken sizzling in the pan. Had I seasoned it? I seasoned it again just in case.

Emmett had also warned that after filing the EPO things could get hairy. If James was the kind of guy we were all thinking he was, then a protective order wasn't going to stop him, just probably make him more careful. That scared me, considering I would have to be even more on the lookout than I already was.

He also advised me to keep mom and dad out of the loop for now, unless I wanted dad to jump the gun before we could take all the proper steps. Emmett was pretty sure I would be locked down in the house while dad called in backup to guard me, and then race off to Seattle in record time, which would be impressive considering he had probably never had to take his cruiser over the speed limit in his career.

I didn't think telling him would be the greatest idea either, but Emmett's version of events definitely had my mouth snapped shut.

When we all sat down to eat dinner that evening, the first bite almost choked me. How much salt was on this chicken? I looked up to see dad inhaling his food.

"Bells, this is great. You have to visit more often," he said, his mouth partially full. Wow, Mom must be really bad.

"Yeah, definitely."

"And you'll be back down in a few weeks for Thanksgiving, right?" he glanced at me hopefully.

"Of course," I smiled. Where else would I be?

"So how's school going?" my mom asked, not seeming to notice the salt overload either as she stabbed her next bite with her fork.

"Good, I guess."

"And your job? Do you like it? Is it hard to keep up? Because if you need help…" she trailed off.

"No, mom. Really, everything is going great," I answered, absentmindedly taking another bite of chicken. Bah! Half the salt shaker had to be in there!

"I can't believe we still haven't seen your new place, or met your roommate. We'll have to come up soon. Maybe once I finish those curtains for the baby we can make a trip up and visit you and Emmett."

I nodded, but silently wondered how I could keep her out of Seattle until this thing with James blew over. I didn't want my parents around if James was about to up his game. The thought made me shiver.

"Truck's still going at 'em, I see," dad grinned. "Em tried to talk me out of you taking it up to Seattle, but I knew it would be good for it."

I just nodded along after gulping copious amounts of water to wash down my food. No reason to tell him of its hiccup a few weeks ago. Dad had bought it off an old friend of his as a gift for my sixteenth birthday and bragged about it like it was some new sporty car I had gotten. Not that I minded the truck, but I could never understand his pride in supplying me with it.

Dad launched into a story about his friend he had gotten the truck from, Billy, and went on and on about their most recent fishing trip. I smiled to myself as I listened, thinking this was exactly what I needed.

Alice called me at 9:05 the next morning.

"Bella," she whined my name in my ear, "when are you coming back?"

Ugh, it was too early for this. And when did she start calling me instead of her insistent texting? I could ignore texting at 9:05 a.m.

"I don't know," I grumbled, but then the previous day seeped back into my memory and I woke up a little more. "Is James still outside?"

"Nope, he left at 3:19 a.m. according to Edward's notes."

"His notes?"

"Yeah. He stayed up after Jazz and I went to bed to keep track of everything like Emmett said." She paused meaningfully. "Pretty sweet if you ask me." The last part was more than a little suggestive.

"But he's not there now?" I ignored her attempt to get me to make a comment on Edward. I still didn't know where we stood or what was going on, and I definitely wasn't about to open that box with Alice.

"No, I checked. Now when are you coming home? The food sucks around here without you. Plus we are running out of stuff. I _need_ you!"

"Yeah, yeah," I mumbled. "I'll be back this afternoon and I'll stop by the grocery on my way."  
Alice squealed in my ear making me jerked the phone away.

I didn't have a grocery list, so I was guessing and throwing random food in my cart as I walked down each aisle at a leisure pace.

I was convinced I was close to experiencing a panic attack when I had reached Seattle's city limits on my way back, which was only exacerbated when I pulled into Albertson's parking lot. I scanned entire place thoroughly before stepping out of my truck and ducking into the store. But for some reason inside the store I was at ease.

I spent extra time in the baking aisle, playing with the idea of making homemade pumpkin pie. It sounded good, being fall and all.

When I finally made it to the check out lane, I grimaced as I loaded my goods onto the conveyor belt. My carefree shopping was about to empty my bank account, but I shrugged it off. I loved cooking, and if anything it was a great way to keep my mind from lingering on James.

The cashier scanned and slid my groceries down to the bagger, who when I met his eyes he quickly ducked his head. I stared at the top of his head and tried to figure out why he looked familiar. Of course, I shopped here every week, but something about him was tugging at my memory. Maybe he went to UW.

He kept his head tucked the entire time it took for me to finish checking out, leaving me only a view of his dark hair, which could really use a wash. As I pushed my cart full of bagged groceries past him, I tried to subtly glance at his face. I was sure he knew I was staring at him and I didn't want to make him uncomfortable, but it was going to bug me all day if I didn't figure out why he looked so familiar. But even as I walked by him he studiously looked the other way and all I caught was his left cheek and jaw, which were somewhat scarred from acne.

Giving up, I pushed my cart outside and suddenly my mind whipped back into paranoid freak-out mode as I scanned the lot for navy cars and/or dirty blond hair. Deciding it was safe I quickly made my way to my truck, thankful it wasn't raining as I filled my bed with all the bags. Then I jumped in the cab and whipped out my phone, calling the apartment. Jasper answered on the second ring.

"Hello?"

"Oh hey, Jazz, its Bella. I'm on my way there from the store and I'm gonna need help up. Do you mind?"

"Of course not. You know what I do mind, though, lil sis? You not telling me about creepy dudes." I rolled my eyes as I took a turn out of the store's parking lot and opened my mouth to apologize, but apparently he wasn't done. "Now this guy is hanging around your and Alice's apartment, just watching you all? I really don't think you should be staying here until we get something good enough to nail this guy. There is enough room at my place to hold everybody." Jasper was in big brother mode.

"Look, I'm sorry I didn't give you a heads up or something, but honestly I'm just figuring all this out myself. And I really don't think I'm going to sleep on your couch while you and Alice put notches in your headboard. Plus where would Edward sleep?"

"Edward could sleep on the floor or he could stay with his folks," he suggested. Like Edward would leave the city while all this was going down. He was just as stubborn as James. And for some reason that thought was way more comforting than it should be.

"Whatever Jazz, we'll talk about this later with everyone, but get your butt in the elevator, I'm just down the street," I chuckled as I hung up the phone.

I pulled into the lot and jumped out of the cab, looking up at the sky. The clouds were high and didn't seem threatening, but the wind was sharp and cold and bit at my skin so I moved quickly. As I rounded my truck to the back to start pulling bags out, a memory flashed through my mind of the time my truck had stalled on me and James had helped me home from the grocery in the rain.

Then, without warning, my mind's gears kicked into action, racing and spinning as it pieced bits of information together. The bagger from Albertson's. With the oily hair and marked up face. He was the pimply kid who hit on me about a month ago.

And was jumped in the campus parking lot, the same evening. I came home from the store that day… and told… _James_.

No. James may hang outside apartment buildings, but he wouldn't _beat_ someone to a pulp for looking at me. Right?

Truth was I didn't know. I had no idea what James was capable of. If I had learned anything this week it was that I knew nothing about him. It wasn't until I heard myself wheeze that I realized I was hyperventilating. I clutched at my chest. Why was James doing any of this? And more importantly, why was he doing it to me?

My vision was almost dim from lack of proper oxygen before I felt someone grab me from behind, which only made it worse, before I recognized Jasper's voice.

"Bells, calm down! I got you. You're gonna be fine." He turned me around and pulled me into his chest while I tried to catch my breath. "Nobody is going to touch you. Everything is going to be fine." I nodded into his chest even though I didn't believe him.

Nothing was fine, especially not me.

**Hello again. So glad you halfway remembered my story and stuck it out through the chapter. I am "back," whatever that is worth. While I was "away" I did a lot of plotting for this story and played with ideas for another one I want to do when this one is finished. So yes, this story will be completed. No, I have no idea how many chapters are left, I am not good at determining that kinda thing. **

**Anyway, I'll shut up now. **

**Come chat in my Twilighted thread? - Link is in my profile.**

**Review? - Button is below. **

**:)**


	21. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer: Hmmmm, do I have gazillions of dollars in the bank? No? Then I must not own Twilight.**

**Warning: This has not been beta'd. I heart my beta, but she is super duper busy and I didn't want to put off posting any longer. **

**Thanks Kari for pre-reading! And for having random chats with me about this crazy story!**

**Onward!**

Chapter 21

I felt like I was choking, or better yet, like someone was strangling me. Jasper guided me into the apartment while my air moved in haggard, gasping breaths. He was trying to tell me I was having a panic attack and the only thing that would help would be to take slow, even breaths and to concentrate on that alone. I found it to be much more difficult than it should be.

I just about had my bearings when I looked up and realized I was on the couch in my apartment. Directly across from me Edward's eyes, which were the brightest thing in the room, were wide and worriedly staring at me. The fact that I couldn't remember consciously getting to my seat and that Edward was kneeling in front of me, his hands clasping either side of my knees and witnessing this entire episode, almost made the panic come back. But Jasper was still at my side rubbing small circles on the middle of my back, saying over and over, "You're safe, just breathe."

After what was probably another three minutes, but felt more like thirty, I was breathing normal. I felt like I was having an out of body experience or something, like my head was floating. My eyes moved slowly from Edward, to Alice who was standing behind his left shoulder and biting her thumb nail anxiously, to Jasper at my side.

"Better?" he asked once I looked at him.

I nodded twice.

"What happened? Was he out there?" I couldn't help but notice how soft Jasper's voice was, and that Edward's hands tightened the slightest bit at his suggestion.

I shook my head and swallowed. I hated that they were all seeing me like this, in my weakest state. The thought brought tears to my eyes but I stubbornly held them back; that would only add to my humiliation.

"I think-" my voice was low and thick so I stopped and cleared my throat. "I think he might be worse than we thought."

Jasper nodded, then looked up to Alice. "Can you go grab Bella a glass of water?"

Alice jolted into the kitchen and was back in amazing speed, or maybe I had just spaced out. She handed me the water and I took a sip; the coldness felt great on my throat. She cautiously sat herself down next to me.

"You stay here with Alice," Jasper was talking to me again. "I am going to call your brother, and then Edward and I are going to go get everything out of your truck." He waited until I nodded in agreement before standing up and looking pointedly at Edward, who seemed a little reluctant to leave but followed suit.

Alice laid her hand gently on top of mine as they walked out the front door. I looked over to her and tried to smile, but God only knows what it actually looked like. The fog was finally starting to lift and I was feeling somewhat normal again, but I remained sitting still and in the quiet with Alice until the guys returned. I wasn't sure exactly what had caused my "panic attack" and I was afraid of doing something to set it off again.

Instead I just waited, then watched as Edward and Jasper came barreling in the door with bags lined up their arms, seeming to have gotten everything in one trip. They sat everything on the dining room table before shelving it all, and I didn't seem to care as much that they weren't putting things in the proper places. Maybe because things were in a better perspective, and I realized that things like the organization of my kitchen wasn't high on the list. Edward made eye contact with me every time he was facing my direction while he moved around.

As they were putting the last few things away, Emmett knocked on the door briefly before just letting himself in. He was in his blues, which I always thought made him seem even bigger than he already was. He strolled straight over to me on the couch and crushed me in a tight hug, which made me smile. He used to do this to cheer me up when we were little, squeezing me and singing a little tune about crushing me into Ground Bella Beef.

"Are you on duty?" I asked when he released me. My voice was sounding better.

"I was on my way home when Jazz called. I thought about going on home to change and pick up Rose, but her hormones are off the chart. Plus we still have our bet," he grinned. "And I have a feeling I won't do so well with my language tonight," he added, his ever present smile fading. My smile faded too, because I wasn't looking forward to delving into this. Jazz and Edward finally came back into the room, Jazz with pen and a spiral notebook in hand. I sighed and sat up, ready to get this over with. The boys sat on the floor on the other side of the coffee table facing Em, Alice and I.

"So what happened just now?" Emmett asked.

I lost my nerve and slouched back into the couch before starting to pick at my left thumb nail with the right one. It took me a few minutes but no one rushed me. Finally I looked over to Alice.

"Alice, do you remember a few weeks ago, maybe even longer than that, we saw a story on the news about a guy getting jumped in one of the campus dorm parking lots?"

She squinted her eyes, trying to remember. "Vaguely," she admitted.

"I remember," Jasper said from the floor. "I don't remember his name or any specifics, but I remember worrying about Alice if there was some thug on campus. They never caught him."

I just nodded. Of course no one was caught. No one would suspect a cop, and he would know how to keep from leaving any evidence.

"I think James did it." I took a deep breath and looked back down at my thumbs. "The guy, he works at Albertson's. The first time I saw him there he stared at me the whole time I was checking out. It wasn't anything major, just a little creepy. But it started raining on me that night and then my truck tried to quit on me and by the time I got home, I was just blowing off steam about my crappy night to James," I took a shaky breath. "The next morning was when we saw that story on the news, that he had been beaten and was in the hospital." I shook my head in disbelief, but I knew as the words were coming out that all of it was undoubtedly true.

"I saw him, the guy, at Albertson's today... and I couldn't figure out where I knew him from. And I couldn't get him to look me in the face," I paused and tucked my hands under my thighs to keep from destroying my nails any further. "It all kind of clicked in my head in the parking lot, and the next thing I knew I couldn't breath..." I trailed off, not wanting to remember it.

"I know none of this is hard evidence, but I know it was James. I didn't then, but I know it now." I felt so stupid for not considering this before now.

"But I swear, I just mentioned that guy in passing, I didn't mean for him anything to happen to him," I tried to keep my voice from betraying me, but acknowledging all this was making me sick. I was the reason that poor guy was jumped and beaten. If it weren't for me and my melodramatic rant, he would have never met James. I felt the tears in my eyes but I couldn't tell if they were from anger, embarrassment or just plain self pity. I held them at bay all the same.

Emmett's large arm came back around and he pulled me into his side. "Oh no you don't. I know exactly what you're doing, and none of this is your fault." I didn't reply.

"Well, the good news is if we can find this guy from the store, he might agree to sign an Affidavit too. It would help a lot. But even if we can't find him or if he doesn't want to sign anything, let's get the rest of this down on paper. And then like I said, keep track of any time you see James, whether it is outside around here, or at school, wherever." I nodded at Emmett. He seemed so much older, talking so seriously and not wearing his usual dopey smile.

"When you're at school, try to go from class to class in groups," Jasper added. "Don't single yourself out if you can keep from it."

"Yeah, Bells, honestly you need to have someone with you as often as possible," Emmett agreed.

"How in the world am I supposed to do that?" I was starting to get frustrated. Now I needed a full time babysitter?

"Just ride with Alice to and from school, and the days you work, call me or Jazz or Eddy here to come get you and bring you home." Emmett seemed to think my need of a consist side-kick was no biggie.

I was about to start complaining, not at Emmett but just about the situation in general, when Edward spoke up.

"I'll come get you." I turned and looked at him. "I'll make sure you always have someone with you. _I'll_ be with you."

"What about your job?" I asked.

"My hours are fairly flexible when I'm here," he shrugged with one shoulder. "Mostly I attend meetings, but I'm not necessarily required at the majority of them."

"And what if you need to leave?"

"I don't have anything until December 2nd. I can push back anything that comes up between now and then, and if this situation isn't all ironed out by the time I leave then we'll figure something out." I started calculating in my head automatically at the mention of the date. He had another three weeks, roughly. It was embarrassing how speedy my math was when it came to time with Edward. I was tempted to ask about a million follow up questions, like where he was going and for how long and what in the world would I do without him.

"So do you all want to shack up at my place?" Jasper asked. "I don't like the idea of you and Alice here while this guy is staking the place out."

"He'll just go to your place, Jazz," Emmett guessed. "You don't think he can find your house? He's a detective."

"Well, either way I'm staying here with Alice or Alice stays at my place with me."

"Big change up, then?" I smirked at him. He made a childish face back at me.

"Alright, kids, lets get the ball rollin' here. I need to get home; I want to make some calls and dig around, make sure James doesn't have any family high up or something before we file this." Emmett was looking at the note pad on the table with Edward's notes on James' time spent in the parking lot.

"I never heard him mention his parents," I offered. I realized then I didn't know much about his background at all. I almost felt a little guilty about my lack of effort in our 'relationship.'

"Well I want to check all the same. He was made a detective pretty young, which usually means friends in high places." Emmett turned to me. "Lets go through everything you have pieced together about him and get the important stuff filed in court."

I sighed and nodded reluctantly.

Later, after I had dictated everything to Jasper and he fashioned it into an amateur legal document, Em wrapped his brawny arms around me again. "You gonna be okay?"

I nodded because it felt like I really would be. Even though I was upset and hated that this was changing my life, along with everyone else around me, I felt surrounded by people who loved me and wanted to protect me.

Em squeezed me one last time before standing up. "Well I'm off. Gotta go check on the little lady." He winked and headed toward the front door before stopping and turning around.

"Oh, and Bells? If you see this guy in the parking lot after you file your EPO, for the love of God call me before you call the police station. 'Cause I'm gonna get here first and beat his ass."

As soon as Emmett left I found I couldn't sit still any longer and decided to get up and to put my new groceries to use. Cooking made me feel relaxed, made me feel normal.

I was feeling indebted to Jasper after how well he had taken care of me and the situation today, so I was making his favorite meal of home made hamburgers and hand cut french fries. It was easy to do without concentrating, and I was listening to him and Edward carry on in the living room. Every once in a while I would peek my head around the doorway and spy on them, watching Edward explain some new aircraft-related technology with his hands while Jasper watched with excitement and asked questions. Alice was listening too, but just out of love for her brother and not total interest in what he was talking about like Jasper.

Just knowing that they were all supporting me in this mess I had brought down on them was an amazing feeling. I had never felt so loved, felt like I had such loyal friends. It was a small ray of sunshine in this horrible thing James had started.

Dinner was fun and relaxing. It was as if they knew exactly what I needed and we bounced from topic to topic, staying clear of anything that might lead back to James.

"So Bella," Alice grinned at me. "Why didn't you tell me Jasper was such a germ-a-phob? Did you know he won't eat after me? I mean, he has had his mouth all over me, but ask him to take a bite of this burger," she waved the remaining piece of her sandwich in the air, "and he clams up."

Edward was sitting beside me scrubbing his face with his hands, trying to get mental pictures of Jasper's mouth and his baby sister out of his mind, I'm sure.

"Yeah, I knew he was weird about that stuff. He won't drink after Rosalie or anyone in his family, and you should see him if anyone happens to double dip." I answered, shaking my head and smiling at him at the same time.

"Eating after someone and kissing someone is totally different," Jasper defended himself, prepping for his rant. "When someone takes a bite of something, not only are they leaving little bits of spit but everything else that had been in their mouths while eating. That burger," he pointed at the one Alice still held, "probably has very fresh remnants of fries, ketchup and Coke mingling on there."

Alice, Edward and I were almost doubled over at Jasper's serious and disgusted expression as he ticked off more reasons that eating after someone was gross.

"I'm surprised you'll even eat after yourself," I told him, which made Alice laugh harder. Jasper just made a face at me in return.

"Edward wouldn't care, though. He used to practically make out with our dog, Lady," Alice pointed at Edward. "When we were kids he would get right down in her face and let her lick him right in the mouth!" I looked over at him, watching as his ears pinked.

"I never kiss and tell," he muttered, which made us all giggle even more.

A couple hours later, Alice and Jasper were headed for the door.

"We're going to stay over at Jazz's," Alice said as she grabbed her tote and pulled it over her head and adjusted the strap on her shoulder. "I'll swing by here tomorrow morning before school to get you though." I frowned; I had almost forgotten about everything else going on.

"I can take her on my way into work, Al. Coming from Jasper's you will have to pass campus then turn right back around," Edward's voice came from over by the large window in the living room. He was facing the window, and it dawned on me that he was looking for any sign of James.

Alice looked at me for approval and I shrugged at her. She smiled and leaned over to whisper in my ear.

"I _am_ going to get you alone, and you are going to spill," she pulled back and somehow managed to smile and look serious at the same time. I shrugged again, playing it off.

There really wasn't much to tell.

Later that night I found myself lying on my right side in bed facing my alarm clock, watching it tick off minutes slowly. After all the complaining I did about not wanting a constant babysitter, being alone in my room made me uncomfortable. I knew I was safe in my room, and Edward was just down the hall, but I couldn't make myself close my eyes. Not to mention my mind was racing, trying to flip through anything I missed on James, or just running over the things I already did know over and over.

I was starting to get a headache.

Finally I convinced myself at the very least I needed a drink of water, the oldest and lamest excuse in the book. I threw back the covers and padded to my door and cracked it open. All the lights were off, but a soft bluish glow from the television danced through the living room and down the short hall.

As much as I didn't want him to know I was afraid of being alone, I knew that going back to my room was pointless; I was not getting any sleep in there. I knew he hardly slept himself, so I was hoping he wouldn't mind some company.

Still, if he happened to be asleep at this ungodly hour I didn't want to wake him, so I tip-toed toward the living room, avoiding that one squeaky floorboard on the far side of the hall, until I reached the corner and poked my head around.

And of course he was lying back long ways on the couch with his head propped on the arm, looking way to gorgeous to be alive. His long, lean arm was thrown over his head as he watched television, and his left leg and bare foot were lying on top of the plaid blanket he always used.

I stepped into the room and he turned to me immediately.

"Hey, what's up?" he asked softly. He tried to glance quickly at my pajamas and back up to my face but I caught it. I looked down and realized they were slightly ratty looking, an old Forks Football t-shirt of Em's with a few little holes in the bottom and a pair of cotton shorts. I fingered the worn places on the hem of my shirt self-consciously.

"Thirsty," I said lamely and went the rest of the way into the kitchen. I couldn't admit I just needed some company; how pathetic would that sound?

After getting my glass and filling it to the brim with water and ice, I walked back out into the living room slowly. I tried to see what he was watching but it looked like just some infomercial, nothing I could claim interest in.

Edward, as studious as ever, noticed my uncertainty. "Everything okay?" he asked, pushing himself up slightly.

I bit my lip, greedily taking in my view of him while I stalled before sighing in defeat. "I can't sleep," I admitted. He sat himself up more and pulled his legs in, enough to give me a cushion of the couch. I walked over and sat down next to his feet, placing my drink on the table untouched. I pulled my knees up to my chest, hugging them while staring at the floor. "My mind keeps racing. I keep thinking about everything that happened today and everything we talked about and worrying I've missed something obvious or important." I didn't add that I also desperately didn't want to be alone.

He reached over, his movement slow and calculated, and pushed a section of hair behind my ear. "Bella, I don't want you to worry about anything. We will fix this. And he won't get anywhere near you again." His words were soft and earnest.

I turned and gave him a watery-eyed smile. He saw right through me; he seemed to have a knack for that. Somehow he always knew exactly what I needed to hear.

He dropped his hand and picked up the remote, offering it to me. I took it silently and started to channel surfed as he settled himself back into the couch comfortably. I wasn't even paying attention to what was on any the channels as I skimmed, I was just enjoying the distraction.

At some point I finally fell asleep. When I woke up the next morning to Edward's alarm clock on his phone, I was laying with my head on his thigh, his hand tangled in my hair. Strangely enough, it didn't feel awkward at all. Neither of us said anything, just sat up and started going about our morning routines.

Even though sleeping on the couch with him had left my neck slightly sore and I had much less sleep than normal, I felt better than I had in a long time.

And walked around the rest of the day with a smile on my face.

James POV

Tuesday (day of the coffee date)

I followed her home after our date was cut short. I was momentarily worried she had completely flaked on me, but she didn't leave the apartment the rest of the evening so I allowed myself to relax. Her stomach must have really been upset then.

That made sense. The girl couldn't lie to save her soul anyway.

Wednesday

I wasn't able to see her leave for school, but I did spot her truck on campus around where she normally parks later in the day. I was relieved she felt well enough to go school. Her stomach must have been better.

I wondered if she would call me today; perhaps apologize for having to skip out so quickly yesterday? Offer to go out to dinner to make it up to me? I smiled, because that seemed like something she would do, even if I was the one who brought it up.

Thursday

I watched her ride with Alice to school in the morning, looking like she was completely recovered from whatever the hell she had the other evening. Well then what the fuck? Why hadn't she called me? She owed me a fucking coffee date, if not more than that.

I took a deep breath before I could get too worked up. The last thing I needed was to go hunt her down in the school again. I had gotten all out of sorts Monday and probably scared the shit out of her. No more slips like that.

Thursday Evening

When I'm off duty I swing by her apartment. Her truck is gone. Pussy Edward's car is gone too. At least they can't be gone together if both cars are missing. I take a little comfort in this and go on home.

Friday

I swing by her place on my way to work. Her truck is gone again, but then I remember that Bella is supposed to work today so I head to campus.

Her truck isn't there either.

What the fuck? Is it broken? Why didn't she call me for a ride? Why hasn't she called me still to reschedule our date?

I stop and get out. Jenkins, my partner, is going to be bitching about me being late again, but fuck him. I need to see if Bella is in the library.

I have the loosest of grips on my temper but I try to sound pleasant when I walk up to some girl that I know Bella works with. Her name is Lauren or Laura, or something like that.

I smile and nod at her like I know her as I approach, which always makes girls more receptive.

"Hey, is Bella working today?" I ask.

The girl smiles apologetically before she opens her mouth to answer and I already know what's getting ready to come out. She says something about her scheduling a vacation day for today and she won't be back until Monday now. I think she offers to help me find something afterward but I shake my head and turn around to slink out the door before I flip my shit.

Where the fuck is she?

Saturday

Fourteen hours. That's how long I stay outside her apartment, waiting for any sign of her. I see Alice, Jasper, and thankfully the douche Edward throughout the day, so I know she isn't with any of them.

When I finally give up on her apartment I drive out to Emmett's to see if her car is there, but it isn't. I am left to assume she is in Forks with her parents, but it is driving me crazy to not know for sure. I debate calling her for over hour before I realize how late it is and that it isn't an option at the moment.

I fight the urge to make the long drive to Forks and head home. I decide that if she isn't home by tomorrow I will call her.

Sunday

I drive by at random points throughout the day, and by that evening I spot her truck in its familiar spot. I let out a sigh of relief at the sight and go back home. As tempting as it is to stay near her, I have paperwork that has to be done and I had already squandered my entire Saturday in that parking lot.

I am thrilled we will resume the nature order of things tomorrow.

Monday

I watch, fire pulsing through my veins with each heartbeat, as an all too familiar car drives up. I am sitting in the campus parking lot near her first class waiting to see her when my worst nightmare comes true.

Fucking Volvo.

Fucking Cullen.

The passenger door opens and she steps outs, waving slightly back into the car before closing it. She is smiling, and if I weren't so angry that my vision was partially blurred, I would appreciate how absolutely beautiful she is.

But all that I can think about is why is she riding with Cullen? What is wrong with her truck? And why she hadn't called me after last week. _And why is she riding with Cullen? _

My phone vibrates in my pocket and I swear to God if it is fucking Jenkins wanting to know where I am again I am going to snap.

Tuesday

I called into work.

I watch her the entire day. I watch as she smiles and chats with her friends as she walks between classes. I watch as she snacks on a bag of pretzels as she is walking into the library for her shift.

I watch as Cullen drops her off and picks her up for the second day, like her personal fucking chauffeur. She can't seem to wipe the smile off her face. Every time I see her she is smiling.

I sit and watch.

And plan.

Wednesday

I can't take it anymore.

At 2:43 p.m., when I know she has a 25 minute break before her last class, I text her.

I remind myself to keep it light.

"I need to cash in my rain check."

When I see her again a few minutes later on her way to class, her smile is gone.

It tells me all I need to know.

**Yikes, right?**

**SO? Hit review and tell me what ya think. Then go to the thread and chat with me!**


	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

**No beta (insert sad face). But my lovely pre-reader Kari gave it a looksy, so at least it has that going for it (cheesy grin here).**

Chapter 22

A pattern developed after that first night that Edward and I spent on the couch together. His couch. His _bed_.

Well, as much as a pattern can develop in three days. Every time we woke up we would smile at one another and get up and go about our business. We never mentioned it. Even when, on the third night, I came out in my pajamas and got comfortable on the couch without any pretending that I would sleep anywhere else.

But it didn't matter. I loved it. I desperately wanted to suggest that we just go sleep in my bed - to be more comfortable of course - but I couldn't for the life of me figure out how to say that without dying of embarrassment afterward or fear of sounding like I was implying something else altogether.

Edward didn't seem put out at all that I was taking up room on his bed or invading his space though. I was sure he was aware of why I was suddenly his couch buddy, but he just smiled and went along with it.

By Wednesday morning I was in one of the best moods I had been in, maybe in my life. I stopped caring about all the boundaries and reasons to keep my distance from Edward and put James on the back-burner and was just enjoying life. When I had imagined leaving Forks and going off to college, this is the life I pictured for myself. Carefree. Maybe a cute guy in the picture.

But of course, my imaginary bubble of ignorant bliss had a very short life.

I was talking to a girl named Jessica from my elective class about nothing in particular when my phone peeped in my pocket with a text. I pulled it out absentmindedly while mid-sentence, only to choke on my words.

It was from James. My bubble had officially been burst.

"I need to cash in my rain check."

My heart hammered in my chest. Even though it was just a text, and it was innocent enough, I felt panicked. Like I was looking him in the face instead of reading a text from him.

"Bella, you okay? You look a little green..." Jessica said, but her voice sounded like it was under water.

I was trying to do the deep breathing Jasper had taught me to keep the panic from turning into anything more.

It's just a text. _Deep breath._ It's just a text. _Blow it out._

When I didn't respond Jessica finally reached out and touched the sleeve of my shirt, which made me jump and snap back to the present.

"Sorry, Bella. Are you okay?" Jessica had recoiled at my sudden jumpiness and I could tell she was a little concerned.

"Yeah, of course. I just, I need to make a phone call," I stuttered. "See you later?"

"Sure," she smiled wearily at me as she watched me go.

I hit clear on my phone half a dozen times to get James' message out of sight and then called Edward, who answered within two rings.

"Hello?"

"Hey, sorry to bother you. Are you busy?" I asked, glad my voice was calm and even.

"Not too. What's up?"

"I got a text from James."

"When?"

"Just now. Nothing big, just wanting to know when he could cash in his rain check from when I ran out early last week. What should I do? Should I respond, or ignore it, what?" My voice was starting to go up an octave.

"Don't respond," he said, and then sighed into the phone. I could tell he was rubbing his hand over his face like he did when he was frustrated. "Have you heard anything from Emmett?"

"No." We were waiting on filing the compliant against James until Emmett could get some background on him, to be sure his family wasn't anyone high up that could make things more difficult. "I'll call and see where he is."

"Alright. Do you want me to come get you?"

"No, no. I'm fine. I have one more class and there's no reason to miss. I mean, it's just a text. I'll be fine for another hour or so."

"Alright, but be careful. I'll see you then."

I smiled as I hung up the phone. Even with all the mess going on, the "relationship," for lack of a better word, that was starting between Edward and I was keeping me afloat. I think I even enjoyed that you couldn't really put a label on it.

I found Emmett's number in my phone and called him.

"Hey, Bells," he answered the phone. "I was just about to call you."

"Oh yeah?" I said cautiously.

"Yeah. I just got off the phone with my buddy who used to work with James when he was still on patrol."

"Good news or bad?" I asked.

"Depends on how you look at it, I guess," he said carefully. "He doesn't have any family or connections high up, which is good. But it is also bad, because according to my buddy, he worked his way up because he is good. Really good, Bells. Even the other detective guys say he is one of the best."

I felt my lunch somersault in my stomach.

"So, what you're saying is that he is good enough not to get caught at doing something bad, then?"

"Pretty much. We are going to have to be very careful. Make sure we do everything by the book."

"What about the guy from Albertson's?"

"His name is Chris Timmons. I called him yesterday and today but he isn't returning my calls. I left messages hinting at what I'm calling about, so I'm guessing he isn't going to cooperate." Emmett took a deep breath and it swooshed out loudly over the phone. "It doesn't matter, though. We can do it without him."

"Okay," I tried to make my voice sound agreeable, but it sounded very small. I didn't like the way the cards were stacking right now.

"I think you better just go ahead and file your paperwork. We'll have a little time before a hearing is set and we can keep trying this Timmons guy, but either way I think you need to get the ball rolling."

"Okay," I said again.

"Did you want me to go with you?" he offered.

"No, that's okay. All it will be is filing the paper stuff, right? I'll have Edward with me and then when a hearing is set I'll let you know."

"Alright. If you change your mind call me."

"Sure." I glanced at my watch. "I better go, I have a class about to start."

I got off the phone with Em and walked to class with a grimace and a sour stomach.

**

When my last class let out and I made my way toward the spot on campus where Edward usually dropped me off and picked me up, I actually felt my mood lighten.

I loved having a chauffeur. Well, this one anyway.

"Did Emmett have good news?" Edward asked as I climbed into the car.

I realized he was asking this due to my goofy smile, which was really only there because of seeing him. "Oh. No," I answered.

"So which is it? No news or bad news?" he asked while I threw stuff into the back seat of his car.

"Well, Em said it depends how you look at it. He doesn't have any friends in high places, so that's good. But apparently he made his way up so fast because he is just that good."

Edward realized what this meant right away and frowned a bit.

"He says I should go ahead and file tomorrow."

Edward nodded in agreement. He was putting his car in gear and pulling out on the road when his cell phone rang from the middle console. He answered it and mumbled for a bit before I realized it must be a work call.

"Hey, do you mind if I run back to the office real quick?" he asked as he hung up the phone. "I need to grab a file."

"No, of course not."

I filled Edward in on the rest of the details, including our flaky witness, as we drove to his building, but kept getting distracted by everything we passed as I looked out the windows. I rarely got around Seattle outside of my little routes I took to school and the store so I was almost excited to see a new and different part of the city.

It shouldn't have surprised me that when we finally reached the building that held Edward's company it was one of the bigger buildings, but it did. He pulled into the adjacent garage and wound around until we pulled into a spot that had "Mr. Cullen" on the wall in front of it.

"Wow, Mr. Cullen. You're like... a grown up," I smiled at him teasingly.

He stuck his tongue out at me in return.

"So should I stay put?" I asked. I wasn't sure how well visitors were received in his office.

"Are you kidding? You've got to catch up with all your friends from the dinner party," he smiled and stepped out of the car.

"Oh well, yeah, of course," I played along as I got out and shut my door. "I'm sure they're all dying to hear what's new in 'utter humiliation,' since that was my area of expertise that night."

"Naturally. No one can give it to them straight like you," he laughed as we made our way toward the short walk way and elevator. Once we reached the 21st floor where his office was located and stepped off, I immediately regretted coming along. I was in my ratty jeans, a plain brown shirt and hoody jacket while everyone jetted around the office purposefully in their expensive suits and four inch heals. I looked up at Edward in a slight panic but he just shook his head and pushed me forward by the small of my back.

He leaned over while we wove down the hall and through people to whisper in my ear, "You worry about the most inconsequential things."

"Well you aren't a very clear judge of the inconsequential," I advised him in a low whisper. Of course he wouldn't think it would be a big deal to be in this situation because he never would be. He just fit in everywhere he went.

After three turns and dodging one person with coffee cup held in front of him walking speedily toward the other end of the office, we finally reached Edward's door. Perched just outside of his office was a small desk behind which sat a beautiful woman with long, strawberry blonde hair that fell in ringlets around her perfectly oval face and crystal clear blue-gray eyes. She would have even give Rosalie a run for her money.

I only felt a small amount of relief at noticing the three-carat-plus ring weighing down her left hand.

"Bella, this is Tanya, my assistant. Tanya, Bella," Edward introduced us.

"Belllllla," she drew out my name, seeming to imply that she had heard of me. "Nice to meet you," she smiled sincerely.

"Likewise," I said softly before Edward ushered me on into his office. It was huge, of course, and was decorated in deep dark browns and reds. It looked like it would fit an old stuffy attorney better than Edward.

"I won't be long," he promised and he went straight to his desk and started to rummage around. I walked over to an over-stuffed chair and sat myself down while he sorted through his work. After half a minute he sighed loudly and looked up at me.

"I think the file I need is in Mr. Muncy's office. Will you be okay here for a second?"

"Sure," I reassured him.

He smiled and walked quickly back out his door and closed it behind him. I sat and looked around for a minute, noticing he had no pictures or anything personal in his office. And it didn't feel like him. Then it dawned on me that he was hardly ever here to use it. He probably didn't feel any attachment to it at all.

About that time Tanya walked in with a stack of papers in hand and strolled toward a filing cabinet to the left of Edward's desk before she noticed me.

"Oh, hey Bella," she smiled at me sweetly.

"Hey," I replied. She was so insanely beautiful and now that she was standing I could tell she was built just as perfectly as well, but for some reason she didn't strike me as intimidating. She didn't look familiar at all though. "Were you not at the office party-thing a couple weeks ago?" I asked, trying to place her.

"Oh, no. Would have been but my husband got sick so we had to stay in. Those things are a bore anyway," she shrugged.

"Oh," I answered. Obviously she had never been to one where I was the entertainment.

She shoved her papers into a folder in the filing cabinet and closed the drawer.

"So," she said suggestively. "I get the feeling you must be the reason behind the uproar this morning."

"Huh?" I must have looked as dumbfounded as I sounded. She walked over to the chair that sat next to me, sat down and leaned toward me a bit.

"The tiff that Mr. Cullen and Mr. Muncy got into this morning. I'm guessing you're the reason he is backing out of the deal?"

"What deal? What in the world are you talking about?"

"_The _deal," she said as if I would suddenly know what that meant. I went on looking at her like she had three heads. Finally she must have realized my cluelessness because she rolled her eyes slightly with a small smile and went on. "The deal where Mr. Cullen handles all of the marketing part of the business for ten years, and after he would become a Partner."

"A Partner? Here?"

She nodded in return.

Wow, I couldn't believe that Edward was so close to owning part of a company like this one.

"Wow," I said out loud that time.

She nodded again.

"But, wait, you said he wants out? Why on earth would he give up a deal like?"

"I told you. My guess is you." She winked at me, stood and straightened her skirt, and walked back out of the office.

I frowned. Surely she had it wrong. There was no way Edward would give up something that big over me. No way he would give up something he had worked so hard for, given up so much for already for me. And if he was crazy enough to try, then I would make sure he didn't.

I was quiet on the way back to the apartment, mulling over everything Tanya had told me. I wanted to ask Edward about it but didn't know how to bring it up. And I didn't want to get Tanya in trouble in case she wasn't supposed to tell me anything. But I couldn't ignore it either, on the chance he might really be doing something so stupid.

My phone rang, pulling me from my musings. Edward looked over at me and frowned, seeming to worry that it might be James. I looked at the screen and mouthed "your sister" to him as I answered.

"Hey Bella," Alice chirped in my ear. "What's up?"

"Nothing. I'm with Edward and we are on our way back to the apartment."

"So what are you two up to tonight?" For the last couple of days, Alice had taken to referring to Edward and me as a couple. She would just assume our plans were with each other and ask what we were doing. It wasn't far from the truth, well at least the part of assuming we would be doing something together. Edward was taking his job as my body guard very seriously.

"I don't know. Why?"

"I was thinking about a double date. We could all go out and get everything off our minds. Do something fun."

I bit my tongue. I wanted to tell her that what me and her brother were doing couldn't be classified as dating, but I couldn't very well correct her in front of Edward. She probably knew this and said it to me now for that very reason.

"I don't know," I said instead. "I'll see what your brother's plans are and get back to you."

"Cool. Tell him we'll meet at 7:00," she sang into the phone before hanging up.

"What now?" he asked, clearly afraid of the answer.

"She wants us all to go out together tonight. But I'm guessing that isn't an option for you, since you have work stuff going on," I gestured at the file that sat on the console between us.

He shrugged but stayed silent after that so I knew better than to bring up anything more about work. I would have to approach it at some point though.

He remained silent after we got back to the house as well; he seemed to be really thinking hard about something so I let him be. I texted Alice and let her know that it would probably just be me tonight but I was definitely in the mood to go and do something as a distraction.

I read over a couple of chapters in a book for school to kill time but it was hard to concentrate. My mind kept wandering to the whole job thing with Edward to worrying about James and what I was going to have to do tomorrow.

After re-reading the same page three times I gave up, closed my book and got up to start getting ready. I changed my shirt to something only slightly more Alice-approved and headed down the hall to touch up. A quick brush through my hair and a thin coat of lip gloss and I was ready to go.

I walked out of the bathroom and into the kitchen while trying to text at the same time to tell Alice to come get me, which of course resulted in me clipping the dinning room table with my thigh.

"Youch!" I yelped and hurried to sit down in the closest chair.

Edward was watching me from the kitchen where he was leaning against the counter and opening a bottle of water with a small smile. "What are you doing?"

"I was trying to text and walk at the same time," I mumbled while rubbing my thigh. He just shook his head at me before tipping the bottle up and taking a long drink.

I grabbed my phone again and attempted my text for the second time. I was halfway through when I suddenly noticed Edward had moved and was now standing right in front of me.

"Are you going out with Alice?" he asked, looking surprised.

"Yes."

"Oh. I thought maybe you didn't want to go. Give me a sec and I'll get ready," he said and started to step off toward the bathroom before I stopped him.

"Edward, you don't have to go. I'll be with Alice and Jasper and I know you have work to do," I explained.

"Do you not want me to go?"

"No! No, I just thought you might need... a break or something. It has to be tiresome, watching over me all the time," I shrugged.

He smiled sweetly at me. "I don't need a break from you, I need a break from everything else."

I smiled back. "Okay then," I agreed easily.

"Give me three minutes," he turned on his heel and headed for the bathroom.

**

Thirty minutes later we were at a laid back pizza joint/bar meeting Alice and Jazz. It was really nice, going out with friends and forgetting about the world outside. Jazz ordered a pitcher of beer for the table but I think he may have been the only one who ended up drinking any of it.

After we ate we sat around chatting for a while, before Jasper suddenly made a double fist pump in the air and shouted, "We should play pool!"

"Yeah, that sounds like fun," Alice agreed. "We can play couples," she winked at Edward and I in an over-the-top manner, then stood up out of our booth pulling Jasper behind her.

"Alice, I've never played," I told her, keeping my tush on the seat. "You and Jasper go ahead."

"No," she shook her head and grabbed my hand to haul me out of the booth as well. "We are all going to play. Plus you have to learn sometime, right?"

We walked over to one of the three tables they had set up and Alice pumped quarters into the side of it. I looked over at Edward beside me. "I apologize about partner preselection. I hope you're good or we're toast."

"I can play, and even if I couldn't, Alice can't and Jasper is clearly altered. Piece of cake," he staged whispered and smiled at me.

He had leaned in close, and I could see his eyes were bright with excitement and they held me for a second before I could look away. I had a brief and cliche fantasy about Edward leaning over my back teaching me to play that caused a very visible shiver to run down my spine. I prayed that he had missed it and turned around.

"Okay, Bella," Alice began in an instructive voice that you might use for a three-year-old. "You see this white ball? You aim your cue stick at it to make the other balls," she paused and gestured at the multi-colored ball littering the table, "go in the pockets."

"Ha ha, Alice," I made a face at her before snatching the cue stick she was holding out.

We played a two games, both of which we (read: Edward) won. Even though my day dream of Edward leaning over me to teach didn't necessarily come true, he did teach me. He explained angles and when to hit the ball soft and hard and how to set up your next play. Alice watched and smiled like the cat who ate the canary the whole time, not even caring she was losing, which was not like her at all. Then I realized that meant that Edward and I were the game she was playing, and she obviously thought she was winning.

The next morning, I skipped my early class and rode with Edward down to the courthouse. It was easy enough to find the clerk's office and get everything we needed to file for a restraining order, as they told us an EPO was only needed if violence had already happened.

Edward stayed by my side while I filled everything out and walked back up to the clerk.

"Can you tell me how this works?" I asked as I handed over all my paperwork.

"Well, do you want the order effective immediately?"

"Can we do that?" I asked, afraid to be too hopeful.

"We'll see what the judge says," she smiled and gathered my papers along with some others and walked out of the office through a door that was labeled "Chambers."

Edward and I wondered slowly over to the seats lined up against the far wall and sat down to wait it out. After all of thirty seconds my nerves got the best of me and my legs started bouncing and I chewed on my lower lip. After four minutes I was starting to practically wring my hands when Edward reached over and grabbed them and moved them onto his lap.

I stilled myself and looked up apologetically at him. "Sorry, I just can't believe I'm doing this. What if I got it all wrong? Or worse, what if I got it all right and all this does is piss him off?"

"Don't worry about it. You are doing what makes you feel safe and that is what is important."

I squeezed his hand as a silent thank you but my legs started bouncing again anyway.

"Ms. Swan?" the clerk called from her small window after about 15 minutes.

Edward and I stood and quickly walked over to her.

"Okay, Ms. Swan. The judge granted your temporary restraining order. This will last only until the hearing, which will be in two weeks. At that point he will decide whether to extend it or not." She handed a few papers through the window. "This is a copy of your order. You need to get copies to the police stations in your area. This," she pulled a paper from the middle of the stack, "is a list of state marshals. You will need to contact one of them to serve the order to Mr. Warren. And this paper has your hearing information on it, with the date, time and where to go. This is important. If you fail to show for the hearing, the restraining order ends and he will be allowed to come in contact with you.

"You will also need to keep a copy of your order with you at all times and call the police immediately if he violates it."

"What if," I asked but my voice was so shaky I stopped and started again. "What if the guy I'm filing against _is _the police?"

"Well," she trailed off, and her face didn't give me much hope. She must have seen my fallen expression and leaned over through the window and whispered to me. "Honestly hon, the police protect their own. Not that they won't help you and honor a restraining order... just be really careful."

I nodded. "Will this cause him to get fired?" I asked.

She shook her head. "They are protected by their union. It would have to be demonstrated that this impedes his ability to do his job properly. But either way it isn't legal grounds for terminating his job."

I nodded again.

She reached out and patted my hand. "Good luck, sweetie."

"Thanks," I said.

I had a feeling I would need it.

**Sorry about the wait. I had to do some research for this one, and in combination with sick babies and spring break, I failed on the being timely thing. I promise I am trying to do better.**

**Anywho, review? Yeah? **


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. Its more the other way around… **

**A/N: Er, so I'm late posting, but at this point you can't honestly say you're surprised, right? Right. **

**Thanks A TON to the lovely Kari for pre-reading and putting up with my random and sporadic emails.**

Chapter 23

_His weight on top of me is almost too much, but I wouldn't dream of asking him to ease up. If anything I want more. More of my bare skin pressed to his, more of his lips dragging against every inch of me, more of our breathy whispers. His hips shift against me and I arch my back in return, running my finger tips down his bare back._

"_Edward," I say in his ear, trying to spur him on. I don't know how we got here, I'm just glad. More than glad. The feeling of being underneath him while he adorns me with kisses is unbelievable. _

_I draw my knees up and cradle his mid-section a bit more, which adds pressure and pleasure and we both groan. Suddenly I'm tired of the build up and I start to plead._

_"Please," I beg. He pulls his head back to look at me and his hooded eyes and laid back smile make the want come tenfold. "Please," I say again, a little louder._

_I can tell he is about to give and my body is tingling with anticipation. His hands grip my waist as he lines us up and I can barely keep myself from rocking to speed him up. It's torture knowing I'm so close to what I want. What I need._

_Until..._

I'm jolted awake by the beeping of my alarm clock. My hands almost ache from gripping the sheets and I can feel a thin sheen of sweat across my forehead.

Oh holy jesus. I'd had a sex dream about Edward.

I eased up on the sheets and took a slow breath to steady myself before finally flicking off the alarm. My body was still on edge; it clearly didn't know the dream wasn't real and I needed a minute to calm down.

It dawned on me suddenly that I very well could have been moaning loudly during this dream. Crap! I glanced at the door - as if it would tell me whether it allowed any noises to escape - then whipped my head back around to the alarm clock and noticed it was 7:02 am. I felt only slightly comforted that Alice and Jasper shouldn't be up yet. Edward's schedule was a bit more unpredictable. I stayed completely still and listened for any sounds in the apartment, but heard nothing other than my pulse in my ears. I sent up a short prayer that nothing came out of my mouth during the dream and if anything did, that no one have heard. As I started to get up out of bed, I added a quick addendum that if anyone did hear, I would appreciate an instant death before I had to face them.

It took me a good thirty minutes to work up enough courage to peek my head out of the door before slowly tiptoeing down the hall. Thankfully there was only silence coming from Alice's room so I forced myself to venture out to the living room, only to find it empty. I crinkled my face in confusion, trying to think where Edward would be so early on a Friday morning.

I had given up our couch sleeping arrangement, albeit reluctantly. It had lasted six glorious days, but when Alice and Jasper came back and stayed the night in the apartment instead of his house, I chickened out and went back to sleeping in my room. Sleeping on my own didn't go well the first couple of nights, but now I was managing. The sad part was that I knew that whenever Alice decided to stay with Jasper again, I wouldn't have the nerve to try and work my way back onto the couch.  
I'd had a good run, but it was over.

And if I was going to have embarrassing sex dreams and be moaning Edward's name in my sleep, it was probably for the best anyway.

The thought of the dream made my insides flutter. My body missed the weight of him and I hadn't really even experienced it!

I needed a distraction, so naturally I walked on into the kitchen to make a nice breakfast before my shift at the library. Alice and Jazz would be excited, as would Edward if he got back from wherever he was in enough time to eat it.

I pulled out all the makings to make IHOP look pitiful and got to work. I loved cooking, especially when I had a lot on my mind.

I was nearing the end when Edward came through the front door in jogging pants and a long sleeved t-shirt, all of him damp looking. My face flushed and I turned away quickly.

"Hey," he said, making his way into the kitchen as I willed my heartbeat to slow. Stupid dream.

"Hey," I mumbled, cracking open an egg and dropping it in the frying pan. Edward walked up and stopped next to me, standing way too close.

"A lot of good that run just did me," he teased, eyeing all the food I had made. I smiled slightly back, my body stiff as I poked at the egg with the spatula. My dream was way too recent and he was way too close for comfort. I was torn between throwing myself on him and running and hiding in my room.

Edward, who was scary-good at reading me now that we spent so much time together, noticed something was off. "What's with you?" he asked as he poked me in the ribs jokingly, which made me jump exaggeratedly. I laughed slightly but it sounded off. What was wrong with me? It was just a stupid dream!

"I'm good. Just woke up a little early," I said, not even able to get that much out without blushing.

Edward's face turned serious. "Are you not sleeping?" he asked, concerned. We had never spoken aloud about our nights sleeping on the couch together, like it was something that would cease to exist if we did.

I just shrugged and flipped my egg. "I'm good," I said finally, and turned to give him a small smile so he wouldn't worry. He returned the smile and grabbed a plate.

By the time we both sat down to eat, my awkwardness had spread and had turned into a force in the room. Edward was quiet as he ate and I did my best to keep flashes from my dream from entering my mind and leading to a tell-all blush.

After a good 10 minutes of nothing but the sound of our jaws moving he finally spoke up.  
"So... Thanksgiving is less than two weeks away. What are your plans?"

I swallowed my bite and looked from my plate to him. "Me and mom usually cook together, but honestly she just sits and talks to me while I'm in the kitchen. She might do a few things," I smiled, thinking of the incident last year when she burnt the only thing she was in charge of - the rolls - "but she mainly just chats. Em and Rose come down. It's just us. My dad was an only child and mom has a sister in Arizona, but they aren't very close. I've only met her a few times."

Edward gave a tight-lipped smile and took another bite of food.

"What are your plans?" I asked.

He chewed thoughtfully for a minute before answering.

"Not sure. This will be the first time I've been home for Thanksgiving for a couple of years. But my mom usually cooks this huge meal and invites aunts, uncles, cousins, third cousins, fifth cousin twice removed, you get the picture," he smiled. "I'm sure that's the plan for this year."

I nodded. "But you are staying through the holiday this year?"

"Yes."

I took a deep breath and steeled myself for the next question. I had danced around it as long as possible and now seemed like the perfect time to bring it up. "So when do you leave again?"

Edward swirled his fork around his empty plate before finally dropping it and pushing the plate away from him.

"They want me in Chicago on December 1st," he said, then finally made eye contact with me. The way he said it made it seem like that wasn't definite, so I waited for him to elaborate. When he didn't I cleared my throat and decided to put all the cards on the table.

"You know, when you took me to your office last week, Tanya filled me in on some things. Office rumors and stuff," I hedged. He nodded while looking down at the kitchen table. After a few seconds of silence I added, "So is it true? Are you trying to leave the company?"

He looked up at me and nodded again, slowly. He seemed hesitant about my reaction. I bit my lip while I tried to figure out exactly what to say.

"So have you told them you aren't going?" I asked, wondering if he had backed out of for good or if they were still discussing things.

"No. I've told them I want out of my contract and they are trying to convince me to stay."

"Listen, Edward, I can't honestly say I wouldn't be happy at the idea of you not having to travel all the time, but you are giving up so much. Are you sure you want to throw all that away after the years you have put in?"

He sighed loudly and buried his face in his palms. "I don't know what I want, Bella," he mumbled into his hands before dropping them loudly on the table. "I thought this was what I wanted for so long, and I really do love the traveling, but after spending so much time here recently with you and my family and realizing what I've been missing, I don't know if I can do it another seven years, you know?" He took a deep breath before continuing to ramble. "They are offering to let me travel somewhat less but they won't give me any specifics and they want an answer by the day after Thanksgiving."  
I didn't know if I was crossing a line, but I couldn't stop the gut reaction I had to his distress, and reached out to put my hand on his forearm and rubbed my thumb across his skin soothingly.

I wanted to tell him not to give up the job for me, but I didn't want to sound so presumptuous, even if it was Tanya who was the first one to suggest that I was the reason he wanted to back out. Plus I didn't want him to get the impression that I didn't want him around, because I did. The thought of him leaving made all kinds of things ache in my chest, but the thought of him giving up so amazing for me turned my stomach.

So instead, I said, "Whatever you decide will be for the best," and gave him a reassuring smile and a squeeze from my hand.

I'm not sure how it happened so fast, but the next week flew by and before I knew it, it was the day of my hearing. I must have tried on twelve outfits before I started whining and calling Alice into my room. She just laughed and put me in a pair of her tan dress pants and my maroon top and threatened to take me shopping again before leaving the room.

When we got there, I felt almost ridiculous, walking into the courtroom with so many people. Emmett, Jasper, Alice and Edward all insisted on coming, either as a witness or emotional support. Rose had wanted to come too but she had taken so much time off work early in her pregnancy that she didn't really have any now. I assured her that everything would be fine and that I would much rather her save any vacation time for taking care of herself and my niece or nephew.

We were told there would be a lot of cases heard this morning, and there was no way to know how long we would have to wait before my case was called. As soon as we were in the courtroom my eyes scanned everywhere looking for James, afraid of what I would see on his face, but he wasn't in the room. I sighed audibly with relief as we made our way down the center aisle and took up almost an entire bench on the left side of the room while waiting for everything to start.

Edward sat down next to me and grabbed my hand in his and pulled it onto his lap. I hadn't even realized my hands were shaking until he taken one. I sat on the other to still it as Edward leaned over to whisper, "You're fine, just take deep breathes. Nothing can happen to you here."

I nodded and did as he said, concentrating on nothing but my breathing. It was working for the most part, even though every time someone else walked in I jerked around quickly to see who it was. To see if it was James.

It took a few more minutes before the Judge finally started calling cases off the docket. I looked around again, still not seeing James. What happened if he didn't show up?

But of course I wasn't lucky enough to entertain that thought for long. About half way through the second hearing, the door opened again and finally James walked through. He didn't look our way at all, just straight ahead and took a seat on the other side of the aisle from our group and further up.

My heart was trying to leap from my throat and Edward rubbed my hand soothingly, even though he was glaring in James' direction in the meantime.

"Swan vs. Warren," the judge called out not ten minutes later. I finally snapped my attention back up front, then looked at my family and friends nervously. Edward nudged me a little, but I couldn't feel my legs. There was no way I could go up there and do this.  
James was already making his way to the front when Emmett leaned around Edward and whispered to me, "Go, Bells, you can do this."

I felt like I could vomit, but put myself on autopilot, trying my best to tune out everyone and everything around me, trying to look somewhat confident as I walked up front.  
I looked everywhere but to my right.

The judge looked to be in early sixties, balding with dark gray hair. He wore reading glasses far down on his nose as he reviewed our paperwork, making some comments under his breath to the court reporter who mumbled something back and handed him more papers. Finally he turned to us.

"Ms. Swan," he started, "you are filling to have a Restraining Order put against Detective Warren?" _Detective _Warren? Oh crap.

I nodded.

"And it looks like you have turned in some evidence here, a picture of him in your apartment's parking lot, a witness statement from Edward Cullen stating he was in the lot for approximately nine hours that day, as well as an Affidavit from you." I nodded again.

"And you feel like he is a threat to you?"

"Yes, sir," I said, my voice sounding a lot better than I thought it would.

The judge gave me an appraising look before turning his head toward James. "Mr. Warren? Did you want to say anything on the record?"

"Only that I was unaware of Ms. Swan's unease until I received papers. All that was needed was a phone call and I would have gladly given her any amount of space she desired."

The judge nodded and glanced at the evidence in his hands again.

"Alright, well since you are being so agreeable to giving Ms. Swan her space, and I do have evidence of an unordinary amount of time you spent outside her apartment building, I am going to approve the Order. I'll make sure to report to your superiors the circumstances and they can treat it how they deem necessary. Anything further?"

Neither of us said anything.

"The Restraining Order will be granted then, for another 180 days. You can pick up your copies of the final Order from the clerk."

I stood there for a beat too long, slightly in shock at just how smoothly it all had gone. I didn't know what I had expected, whether it was to be denied by the Judge or for James to explode during the process. However, James walked out of the courtroom the way he walked in, eyes straight forward without sparing a glance at anyone.

I finally took a breath and turned around to my group, all of whom were staring at me with similar looks of relief and disbelief.

Autopilot still on, my jelly legs amazingly carried me back to them. Alice was the only one beaming, the guys just looked relieved.

"You won!" Alice said a little too excitedly, like this was sport match of some kind. I just nodded dumbly, still somewhat in shock.

Edward, attuned to me as always and sensing I may need assistance, walked over to my side and threw an arm around my waist as we started to make our way towards the door.

"You know what we should do?" Alice continued. "Celebrate! We could have a few friends over to the apartment tomorrow night and forget all our troubles." She grinned and I could see the wheels turning in her head, already planning everything out.

"Alice," Edward said lowly, "I don't think this is something we want to celebrate, maybe just put it behind us."

Alice rolled her eyes. "It wouldn't be all about getting the restraining order, we will be celebrating a new chapter in Bella's life. One without that creep," she stated so matter-of-factly. I wished I could be as confident as her. I wasn't so sure that a restraining order mattered to him.

Edward didn't say anything else, knowing his sister well enough that she only needed the slightest excuse to throw some kind of party together. I wasn't sold on the theme myself, but I knew better than to try and deter Alice.

The party ended up being way bigger than I had expected. Not that it should have surprised me, but the following night I found out exactly how many people it took to make our roomy apartment feel cramped. I only invited two or three people from a few of my classes, the rest was all Alice. I knew she was a social butterfly by all means, but I had not even fathomed how many people could have showed up on such short notice. Of course, this _was _college.

Edward, still playing bodyguard even though technically he was off the hook, always stayed within eye shot of me.

I tried to mingle, but I felt like I had stumbled into the party uninvited instead of being the co-host. I wasn't sure why I felt so awkward, but as the night wore on I started to realize how many people were sitting in twos. Boy, girl. Boy, girl. Boy, girl. I frowned a tiny bit, wondering how all these college students had time for relationships. Obviously it wasn't unheard of; Alice was balancing it well.

I chatted with a few couples here and there, but it only lasted as long as I could take their PDA. Not anything over the top, just arms around each other, hands combing through the other's hair absentmindedly, etc. Finally I decided I needed some air and made my way toward the balcony, only to stop dead in my tracks at the sight just beyond the door.

There was a couple being _very _over the top out there. They were pressed against each other so that they almost looked like one person with a few extra appendages. And they must have been really caught up in the moment to not notice that is was turning bitterly cold outside.

I glanced at the clock on the wall and decided that three hours was plenty of time to count as being a good co-host and snuck back to my room. There were a few people in the hall but they didn't even seem to notice me as I made myself small and hurried to my door. I unlocked it, squeezed inside, and shut it again firmly.

Finally.

I flopped down on my bed and buried my face in my comforter. I wasn't going to let myself feel down just because I wasn't in a relationship. It was stupid and pitiful. I didn't have time for one and I was only 19. Not to mention I was apparently bad at dating. My first college dating experience had lead to my first restraining order.

Awesome.

I hadn't been in my room for more than 10 minutes before there was a knock on my door. My head snapped up and my eyes narrowed, betting it was some drunken couple wanting to spread some kind of disease all over my bed.

"Go away," I yelled.

"Bella?" It was Edward. I should have known he would notice my absence. "Are you alright?"

I sighed as I got up and walked over to the door slowly. I grabbed the knob and yanked it open, the noise from the living room flooding back down the hall and into my room.

"I'm fine, I just needed a breather," I told him, thinking of the gross couple on the balcony that had ruined my chance of getting actual fresh air.

He smiled a little too knowingly at me. "Me too. Do you mind if I join you or would I be interrupting?"

I opened the door a little wider to let him in and made my way back to my bed. I heard him shut the door behind me.

"Lock it," I told him.

"Are you sure you're okay?" he asked as I heard the lock click. I sat on my bed, pulling my legs underneath me so that I was sitting on my knees as he followed and sat next to me, leaving a comfortable distance between us.

"Yeah," I said, then sighed heavily. "Honestly?" I glanced over at him, watching the way his eyes danced back and forth between mine as he tried to read my thoughts. "The main reason I wanted out of there, was because... I felt lonely."

His eyebrows creased.

"I was just watching all those couples out there. Perfectly paired off. And the reason they're all here at my apartment is to celebrate the fact that I keep pushing people away." I frowned and then looked away. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't unload on you."

He was quiet next to me for a good minute before I finally got the nerve to look at him again. His expression was kind of sad and hopeful at the same time. He reached over and grabbed my hand and squeezed it.

"Bella, I don't want you to ever feel lonely. You have so many people all around you, who would do anything for you, including me."

"I know," I whispered, doing my best to give him a small smile, then turned my head down to stare at the floor. I knew I had people who loved me, who would do anything for me. It didn't make me feel any less of a third wheel though.

I felt him squeeze my hand once more before standing. "It's late. I'm going to go clear the place out." He took a step away from the bed before I stopped him.

"Edward?" My voice was still almost a whisper, but he heard and turned back around to face me. "I just wanted you to know that I appreciate all that you did for me. I honestly don't know how I would have gotten through all this without you."

He smiled, taking a step back toward me and as soon as he was within arm's reach, I sat up on my knees, grabbed him and pulled him to me in a bear-tight hug. I was sure I caught him off guard, but he returned the embrace immediately and wholeheartedly, his arms sliding around me to pull us even closer together.

I held onto him for a good, full minute before making myself release him. He pulled back, leaving less than a foot between us. "Anything," was all he said, his eyes reflecting how much he meant it.

Then, any and all reasoning gone from my head, I reached up and pecked him softly but quickly on the mouth. I pulled back immediately, my wide eyes looking into his. I wasn't sure why I had done it, it felt natural and pretty innocent, but it obviously took both of us by surprise. Edward's face mirrored mine for a short moment, but apparently it was the only invitation Edward needed. His hand slid around my neck and under my hairline as he quickly closed the distance between us again, his mouth returning to mine full force, sending heat shooting in every direction in my body.

His lips molded to mine, and while it started out strong but sweet, it very quickly escalated into a nipping and needy frenzy. I was just as crazed, my hands running up his neck and up through his hair, holding onto it and using it to keep him close.

After a minute or so, Edward pulled away, his breath panting hard as he looked at me. "Please tell me this isn't because you feel lonely."

I smiled softly and shook my back and forth. "No, this is because I give up. I'm done making excuses." He returned my smile, knowing what I was saying. "This is just long overdue."

And with that I pulled his lips back to mine.

**I know, sorry. I tried to make this end differently but it just wouldn't. I promise I'm not fading to black on you, nothing is gonna happen the first night!**

**Next chappy will have the James POV I'm sure you guys are all looking for and it is mostly written, so keep a looksy out for it!**

**In the meantime, let me know what you thought!**


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